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AIBU - to be worried about the future for my grand children

(119 Posts)
WishIwasyounger Sat 15-Feb-20 20:10:48

I seem to very wobbly these days about the future, what with the climate change emergency threatening our very existence, the growth of populist right wing governments, the increasing poverty gap, and the spreading of international killer dieseases such as the Coronavirus (why isn't it spelt as two words Corona Virus).
My grand children are growing up in a much worse gobal environment than I did. Please re-assure me that they'll be ok.

Yehbutnobut Sun 16-Feb-20 09:32:25

I feel the same as you OP. to the extent that I wish I’d never had children and thus grandchildren if this is the world they will surely inherit.

Chestnut Sun 16-Feb-20 10:03:25

You're being a doom monger Yeh. Haven't you read this thread? There is much to be thankful for and you cannot predict the future. I hope you don't express those thoughts to your children and grandchildren.

Hetty58 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:05:30

Yehbutnobut, we have children when we're young and in love. The world is a beautiful place and we enjoy it with precious little new beings.

It's only when we're older that we begin to see (and experience) the gruesome pain and reality of life. We realise that we can't protect them for very long. I now believe that it was selfish and stupid to have children at all. Why perpetuate it?

optimist Sun 16-Feb-20 10:15:26


grandtanteJE65 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:18:01

I was born in 1951 and have faint recollections of the Hungarian uprising and Suez in '56. The 1970s saw troubles in N. Ireland, the middle east, the Vietnam war. I can also remember the French fighting in Africa before giving up their colonies, Apartheid , Powell and Paisley stirring up hatred, the Falklands crisis and the advent of AIDS.

Somehow, we just got on with living through it all, didn't we?

Your grandchildren will too, through whatever they have to tackle.

It's understandable you are concerned for them, but if you look at my list I am sure you can fill in all the good things that happened, which I have left out.

GrandmaWednesday Sun 16-Feb-20 10:20:09

I don't think it's unreasonable to be worried about our dgc's future. The threat of gloal warming is of a different order than historic challenges, which may have threatened societies, civilisations, but not the entire planet. However, being aware isn't enough. We must do all we can, those of us with enough time and resources, to protest against the short sightedness and self interest of our populist governments. Then at least we can play with and enjoy our dgc's while we can, and help to build their resilience for living in an uncertain future.

Jillybird Sun 16-Feb-20 10:23:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

maddyone Sun 16-Feb-20 10:26:59

Welbeck, my husband and I had the MMR vaccine last year as part of our travel vaccinations because a country we were about to visit had a measles outbreak. Just ask at your surgery, you can have it.

Hetty58 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:27:17

A science professor told me that we have to accept the fact that we're living on a dying planet. Apparently, we passed the point of no return back in the 1970s. All we can do now is slow down the inevitable.

The situation is very different to all the temporary troubles mentioned above. Man is self-destructive, entitled, ignorant and lives in a cloud-cuckoo land of denial, false beliefs and perpetual optimism.

Beanie654321 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:30:04

Dear wishiwasyounger. The world is crazy and it must have felt like this with our grandparents and parents as they prepared for war. Life is an uncertainty that's what makes it interesting. Our children will grow up right with the love and support we give them. They just need to know they are loved and have some one to turn too when situations occur. We cant change the world we live in as one situation improves another will come along. Xxxx

annab275 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:34:36

I nearly wasn’t born as my parents worried about the future of the world just after the war and Hiroshima- luckily I was. Always be optimistic and trust that your children and their children will help the world move to a better place. Also it seems that disaster and negativity are good for the press and media.

4allweknow Sun 16-Feb-20 10:34:41

No matter what Age there are always what seem to be terrible threats to life. Cuban crisis was horrible, daily threat of the west being obliterated. Smallpox, polio even TB would get us all. The London smog from coal fires, how many did that kill! Goodness, no matter where you look there has been and will be doom and gloom. Mankind has a marvellous capacity to overcome most as will your GCs generation.

Oopsadaisy3 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:37:26

Don’t you all think that it’s time to stop all this doom and gloom and try to do something to slow down the problem? At least try to make life worth living for our families.

My DDs and GCs are actively trying to get the message across that we have to change our ways, DD1 spent most of yesterday beach cleaning.

Personally, I’ve stopped buying anything in single use plastics! Milk comes in glass bottles, I take my own brown paper bags for loose fruit and veg and I have old Tupperware containers that I take to the local farm shop for meat and fish, they are more than happy to place goods in them.
I’m trying to do my bit, but it’s frustrating to see people of my age with their plastic wrapped goods being put onto the conveyor belt at the checkouts.

We need to keep nagging our MPs to put forward greener legislation.

All this wringing of hands, how many of us are trying to change our ways?

I have an elderly couple who I see quite often who just say that it not worth worrying about, as they fill their bins with plastic, it makes me so cross!

Oopsadaisy3 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:38:08

Sorry a stray exclamation mark made it into a sentence instead of a comma

Saggi Sun 16-Feb-20 10:41:27

What is the matter with you say”Britain an awful place for the young to live in” .My grandson and granddaughter ..12 and 8 are well fed ...well educated( mostly in kindliness to others) sports....guitar and piano lessons. They have never wanted for stability. The boy is 5’6” tall and a picture of health...the little girl is less robust, she has asthma.She is treated with appropriate drugs( all free) to help her live as good and healthy a life as possible. She had regular checks to adjust her medication as she grows.... I grew up with two kids who died of badly controlled I do worry about her and my daughter who also suffers this horrible illness! But to say Britain is an awful place to live is disgraceful... we live in a country that HAS problems ...I don’t disagree. But turn on your tv and see real poverty in India and Africa where some kids are lucky if they get the bare necessities of life....let alone life saving treatments . You should de-camp to these countries , if you think so little of Britain! Leave it to those of us who are thankful to have had the luck and good fortune to be born and live in this country. Makes me wonder why so many folks are clamouring and indeed risking their lives just to get here .

Notthatoldyet9 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:45:34

Life has always been difficult
You are just worrying because they mean so much to you
Try and focus on all the wonderful things life can bring

Minerva Sun 16-Feb-20 10:46:24

My parents had a 3 month old at the outbreak of the WW2 and had three more before the war ended and another one later in the 40s. How’s that for optimism.
I had my babies in the teeth of the Cold War and it did worry me but I still let it happen.
Now I find myself worrying about the grandchildren living in polluted air, extreme weather, a sea of plastic, knives in school and megalomaniac heads of state.
Hopefully they will find a path through it all.

Bugbabe2019 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:46:26

They are bit in many ways it’s a better world also
People tend to look at the past with Rose tinted glasses
2 world wars, slums, disease, etc etc
They’ll be fine!

Saggi Sun 16-Feb-20 10:47:03

....less doom-mongers is what this country needs....and a good ‘kick- up the - arse’ ...for people who think poverty is anything less than a 50” t v

Notthatoldyet9 Sun 16-Feb-20 10:47:56

Life has always been difficult
You are just worrying because you love them
Try and focus on the wonderful things life can bring

grannybuy Sun 16-Feb-20 11:03:06

I'm all for doing everything we can to protect our planet, and because we have the knowledge and tools, we are very aware of what the future might be. Having said that, I sometimes wonder if there's a bigger picture. There may be life cycles in the universe, and we are a minuscule part of this. Maybe the planet wasn't meant to 'live ' forever. Of course it's normal that we see it from our own personal viewpoint, and from our own place in time. Our generation will never know the outcome, and of course we should, and will, strive for preservation. Just a thought.

Phoebes Sun 16-Feb-20 11:04:05

I love your positive post, MOnica!
We have to be as proactive as possible and do whatever we are able to help the planet.
We recycle everything and take our own bags to the supermarket.
I don’t pay any road tax on my car because the emissions are so low. Why aren’t all cars made like this?
Birth control should be actively encouraged world wide with large financial incentives and people should be made to realise that their lives could be so much better without large numbers of children.
I hope the work on plastic digesters is progressing and that all shops will try to eliminate plastic packaging ASAP.
We can all do our bit by a little litter-picking as well. I would help if the council litter bins were checked every day as they are so often overflowing.
We can all do our bit! A lot of drops in the ocean soon add up!

Phoebes Sun 16-Feb-20 11:04:51

It would help!

NotSpaghetti Sun 16-Feb-20 11:14:05

GrandmaWednesday is right - this is of a totally different order. Wars and famines are not global - even World War, however awful and devastating to families, countries, peoples, hasn’t led to the total destruction of the planet.

And whilst you are right M0nica about our significant reductions, these were (and are) the “easy wins”. Unfortunately it’s uphill for us now.

SueDonim Sun 16-Feb-20 11:28:16

I’m loving your post, Monica. smile Yes, we can and should acknowledge the problems the world has and all do our bit towards ameliorating them. In my experience, many people are already doing that, and change is being forced onto the likes of supermarkets by people-power. There’s always more to do but small steps are better than standing there hand-wringing.

The issue of population is a sticky one. We need young people to be born so that mankind’s existence is guaranteed (unless one thinks the loss of mankind would be no bad thing). I read last week that the UK’s population hasn’t renewed itself by the number of births to British citizens since 1974! All of its increase in population since then has been down to migration. Now there’s a thought. However, the best way to reduce, or at least not increase, the world’s population is by educating girls. That has the most effect on reducing birth rates as women realise there’s more to life than having babies.

Quite honestly, though, if I felt as gloomy about the world as some people do, I think I’d take myself out of it by my own hand.