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Funerals just now

(15 Posts)
mariella22 Sat 12-Sep-20 12:57:13

We went to pay our respects to a lovely lady this week, by standing at the side of the road as the hearse and family arrived at the village churchyard, whereupon at least 100 people there then drifted into the smallish graveyard . I thought the point of naming the route to the final resting place was to avoid a crowd congregating there ?

Calendargirl Sat 12-Sep-20 12:59:28

It now seems that any number can gather for outside burials, providing you observe social distancing.

Calendargirl Sat 12-Sep-20 13:00:27

Calendargirl

It now seems that any number can gather for outside burials, providing you observe social distancing.

Whether that still applies after the rule of six, I’m not sure though.

Nannarose Sat 12-Sep-20 14:20:24

I have personally welcomed the return to the custom of standing on the street as the funeral procession goes by. I can't be the only gran who remembers when this was the usual way to show respect and the actual funeral was for close family & friends.
I think it died out as people began to work further away from home and communities were less close. When I was a child, time off for a funeral was granted sparingly, but allowing the workers to stand outside the factory / workshop for a few minutes was standard. The procession would normally make its way past such significant places. We would sometimes be called upon to stand out in the school playground as a procession went by.
I don't think it was a local custom, but we had a Welsh migrant community who would sing as they stood on the street, and I can't hear Bread of Heaven without remembering that.
I moved to London 50 years ago and I stood quietly as a funeral procession went past, only to find everyone else staring at me!
Sorry, haven't really addressed the question, but I think a lot of people don't know what to do, and don't want to appear disrespectful

bikergran Sat 12-Sep-20 16:40:32

I have just arranged my mums funeral we are allowed 22 in the crematorium.

I know many of her neighbours would have come under normal circumstances but are unable to now.

So I printed some little cards with date and time that my mum will be leaving from her home,popped them through the letter boxes at the sheltered accomodation where she lived and where my dad still lives.

I invited them to feel free to see my mum off on her final journey on Tuesday, bearing in mind social distancing.

More for support for my dad who has lost his best pal of 66 years. Im sure some will stand outside and some will watch at the windows.

Daddima Sat 12-Sep-20 16:46:34

A happy rising to your mum, bikergran. I’m sure people will find a way to pay their respects.

Grandmafrench Sat 12-Sep-20 16:53:37

Love and RIP to your dear Mum, bikergran and support and wonderful memories for her best pal. Take care of yourself.

bikergran Sat 12-Sep-20 16:54:06

Thank you Daddima its very painful.

ninathenana Sat 12-Sep-20 17:06:24

A well loved work colleague died recently. I know pre Corona the crematorium would have been packed.
One of his colleagues organised for people too line the street where he lived and where the funeral was leaving from.
I'd never seen or heard of this before. My mum always stayed in behind closed curtains if there was a neighbours funeral.

Calendargirl Sat 12-Sep-20 18:00:44

At the very start of lockdown, a well known local man died. Just an ordinary chap, but had lived in the town all his life.
The day before his funeral, a burial at the cemetery, his daughters put on local Facebook page the time the hearse would set off from his home, and suggested anyone doing their daily exercise could maybe be around then, as only 6 family allowed to attend.

The cemetery was about a mile away, and the whole route from his home to the cemetery was lined with locals, all socially distancing.

His family were overwhelmed, but said how it made a sad day so much better.

morethan2 Sat 12-Sep-20 18:45:24

Condolences bikergran a kind thought coming your way. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Susan56 Sat 12-Sep-20 18:57:17

Sending condolences to you bikergran💐

My husbands uncle died last week,The funeral is invitation only.Unfortunately due to the distance involved in getting there we have had to decline,this has given two other people the chance to attend.
In normal times we would have travelled by train and stayed a couple of days but this isn’t possible due to COVID restrictions.We feel very sad as my husband and his uncle were very close.

bikergran Sat 12-Sep-20 21:20:59

Thank you to you all, it is a sad time and must admit until your thrown into it especially how things are at the moment, you don't realise how distressing it has been for families to not be with their loved ones or even been able to say goodbye.

We were lucky my mum was able to be cared for at her home, with the wonderful district nurses and carers.

My heart goes out to anyone that is trapped in this awful situation we have going on.

MellowYellow Sun 13-Sep-20 18:30:05

Condolences bikergran, how tough for you. A well-known homeless man died in my town recently and on Thursday the centre of the town, where he was usually to be found, was lined with people to watch his hearse carriage, drawn by horses, go by. It was a privilege to be able to see it.

Tweedle24 Sun 13-Sep-20 18:38:49

A friend of my late DH died during lockdown. It was arranged for the route to be lined. Apparently, it was well supported. I didn’t go as I was shielding but, was given all the details later.