To have limited sympathy for this couple

Even in the first world problems are relative and, in the middle of a pandemic having to reduce your wedding list by a small number is hardly going to be on the top of most people's sympathy list.

First World, not first work ?

Yeah, they are first work problems, but we live in the First World - what other sort of problems are they going to have?

Not being unreasonable at all! First world problems!

People are often not very sympathetic to others they consider made unwise decisions. The comments to this article in the Irish Times are generally negative - basically that it was foolish to travel to Hungary for Christmas markets www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/travel/we-were-ready-to-come-back-from-our-city-break-then-my-mother-tested-positive-1.4759939

Nan0

Yes, we have had several family weddings here using our cattle barn which we muck out , line with straw bales round the walls, pressure hose and sweep clean, tamp down fresh chalk on the floor, have homemade bunting and have hog roast barn dance style weddings with music played by friends / family and a lot of catering by me and local caterers.I.make the wedding cake, or whoever was mother of bride, and hire tables chairs from village hall, do the flowers from own and friends gardens etc

They sound really good and probably don't cost an arm and a leg either.

Yes, we have had several family weddings here using our cattle barn which we muck out , line with straw bales round the walls, pressure hose and sweep clean, tamp down fresh chalk on the floor, have homemade bunting and have hog roast barn dance style weddings with music played by friends / family and a lot of catering by me and local caterers.I.make the wedding cake, or whoever was mother of bride, and hire tables chairs from village hall, do the flowers from own and friends gardens etc

I do have sympathy. Sometimes, against our better judgment, we are trying and hoping for some normality and who’s not disappointed when long made plans fall apart

I suspect the journalist created the GN account for the purpose of finding suitable interviewees. A bit sneaky, IMO.
My daughter is very shy, she would have died of embarrassment.
I on the other hand, am a noticebox.??

Really?

I feel a bit spooked now, Marydoll!

We've had two cancelled weddings in the past two years, one baby has arrived before the wedding and another on the way . Do you think the media will approach me for my 15 minutes of fame?

Calistemon

Beswitched

But would you moan to the press and use terms like purgatory?

Of course we all moan about the restrictions of Covid, having to cancel an outing, or a holiday abroad etc.

But there's a time and a place.

I often wonder where they find the people who moan on the TV news about missing their holidays etc, because of Covid.

When I posted on GN about my daughter's cancelled wedding, I was approached by a journalist, who wanted to interview me.
I declined!

Yes, I realise it's the media which finds disappointed people and probably exploits them.

I was brought up to eat everything because children were starving in Africa and India, and taking money to Sunday school to help them. Did it make a difference?

They must be very disappointed and were caught in that moment.

They go to people who are disappointed, perhaps worried about the loss of money or impact on family, stick a microphone in front of them and ask for a reaction.

I haven't read the article, but unless the couple are saying that their case is more upsetting than people losing loved ones or getting married in wartime then I don't know what that has to do with it. People can be disappointed without thinking that it's the worst thing to happen to anyone ever.

I have never understood the need to rank-order people's hurt. I was brought up being told that there was always someone worse off than I was, and what about the poor children or the starving babies. If anything, thinking about them just made me feel worse, and it made me feel as though my feelings didn't matter. They weren't the most terrible that had ever been felt, so I should just swallow them and be grateful.

As I see it, this couple have had bad news and were reacting to it. No more and no less. They should probably have had more sense than to react in front of a journalist, but if they were young they maybe didn't realise the implications of doing so. I really hope that this sort of conversation isn't going on anywhere that they are likely to read it, as it would just add to their distress.

Beswitched

But would you moan to the press and use terms like purgatory?

Of course we all moan about the restrictions of Covid, having to cancel an outing, or a holiday abroad etc.

But there's a time and a place.

I often wonder where they find the people who moan on the TV news about missing their holidays etc, because of Covid.

To be fair I think.people also dont understand about good marriages, and frequently length of time has nothing to do with it. I know marriages of 30 plus years that were hell on earth.

People have totally lost the sense of what makes a good wedding ...

A friend from the other side of the world attended a daughter's wedding this Summer, and the whole thing turned into a tragedy.

But would you moan to the press and use terms like purgatory?

Of course we all moan about the restrictions of Covid, having to cancel an outing, or a holiday abroad etc.

But there's a time and a place.

It's not a competition is it. Today I was vaguely irritated that I was served the wrong meal in a restaurant, I might even have a whinge about it to someone. This doesnt mean I dont understand what has happened to the hospitality industry recently or the absolute horrific situation in Afghanistan for example but me having a moan has no impact on their situation whatsoever.

I disagree. It was quite emotive on a morning when many Irish people were facing job loss, business closure and ongoing worry about vulnerable family members at a time when hospital resources were at risk of becoming overwhelmed by Covid patients. 'purgatory' being used to describe having to reduce your wedding guest list from 125 to 100 was inappropriate in my view.

Thankyou Beswitched

I just read the RTÉ report online and actually the tone is quite objective and, if anything, sympathetic. Interesting that it has evoked a critical response to the couple, which seems undeserved.

Delila

Why are people criticising complete strangers for expressing their disappointment at having their wedding arrangements spoiled? Surely that’s perfectly understandable.

We don’t know the full story, or their personal circumstances, and can we really trust the veracity of a newspaper report of their situation? We all know that journalists have a tendency to sensationalise any story they can get their hands on, with the intention of provoking a reaction, and it’s clear to see how this article may have been designed to irritate local sensitivities

What was the newspaper by the way?

I actually said newspaper but it was RTÉ, the Irish equivalent of the BBC.

Dinahmo

I have a theory - the more expensive the wedding, the shorter the marriage. I've seen it borne out too.

Not always.

I expect The Queen and Prince Philip's wedding wasn't done on a shoestring!
??

Initially when my daughter's wedding was cancelled the day before the first lockdown, the insurance company refused to pay out for cancellations due to Covid, as wasn't included in the terms and conditions.
It couldn't possibly have been included , as no-one had even heard of Covid, when she took out the policy.

A classic case of wriggling out of their commitments, Marydoll!!

I understand that it won't make up for their disappointment, but hopefully, the couple have taken out wedding insurance and they will be compensated financially.

Initially when my daughter's wedding was cancelled the day before the first lockdown, the insurance company refused to pay out for cancellations due to Covid, as wasn't included in the terms and conditions.
It couldn't possibly have been included , as no-one had even heard of Covid, when she took out the policy.

Eventually the Government stepped in and the decision was reversed. Between that and the credit card companies, we got most of the money back.

As for some of our guests, who were coming from the USA, they had their flight money refunded by the airlines.

It took nearly a year to eventually sort things out.

Dinahmo you are being very brave when I expressed similar sentiments I got a heavy put down.

But I totally agree.