She doesn't think about us.

Again, why is she your friend?

What are her redeeming qualities that make up for the bad ones?

The ball is in your court - fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, same on me

She shouldn't have turned up at all - after being with someone who has covid.
Obviously she should have let you know that - beforehand, not once she was in your company.
Did you stay with her? I wouldn't.

Disorganised /user/loser. Yet one of those who manages to get others running around for her-not my type at all. Your other pal had right idea!

All I can say is dump her !!

If you've known her for 50 years, had you warned your other friend she's always late? How long has she known her?

My late best friend was always late, in the end we always went later than the meeting time. My late husband didn't tolerate it and on several occasions, even going half an hour later, she still didn't arrive and we left. She died aged 52 and I regret not waiting now, she just didn't have any sort of consciousness about time.

Do you need this person when you have others who know the meaning of the word respect?

If someone phoned as I was leaving the house I would either ignore it or tell the caller I could talk later.
She often uses this excuse and is never on time. Another time her shoes broke and she popped home to change but it took her about 20 minutes to do that!

Whoaaa, it would rattle my cage too. Being late often can't be helped as situation arise but to offer no apology or freely explain the reason for being late is just plain rude.

As for meeting up with you AFTER being in the company of someone with Covid, well, that to me is beyond comprehension!

You're right when you say * she has no consideration*, you can't change the way someone behaves but you can change the way you handle it.

Do you know, she sounds like my friends Mum (I am not kidding) who I am pretty sure has mental health problems that have remained undiagnosed all her life. The not mentioning an ill son ever again is just bizarre isn't it?

@Kircubbin2000

Aging affects us all in many different ways. Maybe your friend is starting down the road of Alzheimer's/dementia. Or she's just at that stage of 'what the hell'!

I really hope you warned your other friend that she had spent the day with someone suffering from Covid!!!

You could try treating her likewise, if you think that might have an effect on her. Or you could interrupt her when she ignores you, and put your point over!

Mind you, I think I'd have walked off, too. I have noticed that I'm less likely to just put up with crap these days!

Very kind and thoughtful contribution, Dumpling. Thanks.

It is extremely rude to be constantly late, shows a lack of consideration for others.
I think I would have left as soon as she mentioned that another friend had covid, the woman clearly has no thought for your safety.

We dont go inside cafes since covid and friend had no mask.

I also have memory problems. If your friend hasn't asked after your son it doesn't mean she's forgotten him. It just means she thought of him when she was dusting or something and it had gone again from her mind again when she saw you. There's also a very good chance she no longer has any idea what his illness was and might not like to ask in case she should appear unfeeling at not remembering!

The book, I fear, is lost!

I think I'd have gone inside the cafe with the punctual friend and been finishing coffee when she arrived. If she'd been in close contact with Covid she really should have cancelled anyway. That was very unthinking. I hope you didn't go and sit inside with her. And I hope that if you did, you're ok.

I am one of those people who are always occasionally late. I inevitably start with the best laid plans and intentions but even if I leave for an appointment really early to allow for every traffic light turning red as I approach, something (tractor/accident/road works ...) will conspire to stop me. On the rare occasions I do get somewhere on time/early the other person is late so doesn't appreciate my triumph.

Perhaps memory or some concentration problems.When I told her my son was very ill she never mentioned him again or asked how he was. Also I lent her one of my favourite books and when I asked for it she denied ever having it!
After 50 years I don't think it's worth falling out.

It’s worrying she is still driving, very selfish. I don’t blame your friend for going home if it’s regular occurrence , do you think she has some memory problems,

I am so tired of posts of people who shouldn't be driving but still do

Something really bad has to happen for this to be remediated?

maddyone

I’d have made my excuses and left.

I wouldn't have bothered with excuses, I'd just have left.

What did you do kirkcubbin?

Probably true, she has had a couple of minor accidents lately.Half the population here is the same as the village is a retirement favourite!

kircubbin2000

Hithere

Why do you consider her a friend?

I have known her for 50 years and she always steps up in an emergency. I think as she has got older she is taking a lot of tablets and living in a daze or muddle a lot of the time.
Funny though she was able to get up and get her boyfriend to the airport in time at 6 this morning!

So, this friend takes medication that makes her muddled and living in a daze! She should not be driving!

So she was able to take her "boyfriend" to the airport this am after him being in close contact to her & her other friend positive for Covid no wonder it is spreading everywhere.

I am not excusing her behaviour (and it would have upset me too), but some people do seem to operate on a different plane to others.

I have a friend who is the same - we used to have lunch every week, and she was always late with some excuse. I remember waiting for 15 mins in the rain, and she sauntered up to say that she'd seen a dress she like in a shop window and stopped to try it on! When we were out, if she saw someone she knew, she would leave me standing whilst she chatted to them, not introducing us or including me in the conversation - just rude.

At the same time, she would do very kind things, and was often very caring. It was as though she didn't realise that what she was doing was annoying and hurtful. I don't know if it was that she hadn't been brought up with manners, or quite what the explanation was, but in the end I stopped the lunches. I'm not one to cut out friends as a rule, but it reached the point where I was annoyed more than I was pleased to see her.

Just let it go! Hope you stay well

Hithere

Why do you consider her a friend?

I have known her for 50 years and she always steps up in an emergency. I think as she has got older she is taking a lot of tablets and living in a daze or muddle a lot of the time.
Funny though she was able to get up and get her boyfriend to the airport in time at 6 this morning!