Is it me or them?

I volunteer for the Salvation Army and we discovered, purely by chance, that there are several families claiming food parcels, toys, toiletries etc from each of our 3 local SA centres each week. We aren’t allowed to share details of families because of GDPR, so we decided among us that any family asking for food parcels and other support should be allocated to the SA centre based in their postcode area. This hasn’t gone done well with the families in question and we have been subjected to verbal abuse and threats of violence

Our village has a small informal food bank / box at the church, no referrals or applications, anyone in need can help themselves. There’s one person, well known, who is not in need, who waits for it to be replenished and has been known to immediately take absolutely everything. Mostly it is well appreciated and usually more by the elderly than the young families.

A documentary about the Trussell Trust some years ago made a point of showing users of certain food banks, queuing noisily, some smoking, most with newer phones, the uniform of nails/brows/lashes/lips and dyed hair that must cost more than a few meals, some going home to houses with several big dogs, expensive pets to acquire and to keep, some using big 4wd flashy cars. It left exactly the bad taste the makers must have expected.

"When you give, let not your left hand know what your right hand is doing."and "love your neighbour as yourself " says it all, does it not?

Yes unfortunately tictacnana there will always be those people who feel “entitled “ and will take advantage of everything they can. There are so many very deserving people out there though.

She may have been answering a leading question from the reporter. They need good, preferably controversial answers and it sounds as if they got one.
But even if all was as it appeared, I might have answered the same.
I would happily go without myself, and buy presents for my grandchildren. (Not their parents, I would explain the lack of funds to them, but I couldn't disappoint the children).

I know someone who uses food banks who goes on holiday 4 or 5 times a year - admittedly not abroad but it still seems extravagant when you can’t afford the basics.

Catlover123

Our local food bank doesn't have a referral system. They ask people what they need and deliver, and one person wrote down rump steaks! They had to explain that this wasn't possible. It's impossible to know if everyone is really needy or just taking advantage.

Much depends on how the question was asked, though.

If it was 'which of the following items do you need?' with a checklist, then adding rump steaks is one thing, but if the question was 'what would you like for 7 main meals?' and left open it's another. Some people eat the same things every week, and if rump steaks was their Tuesday dinner then it would seem reasonable to ask for them. They may not have realised that fresh food is not usual for foodbanks for reasons of storage if they had never been to one before.

I don't think that food bank food should all be basics either. I appreciate that if someone has £5 to donate then basic ranges will get them more to put in the donation bin, but it must be depressing to have to live on pasta and tinned tomatoes all week. The occasional treat is no bad thing.

Catlover123

Our local food bank doesn't have a referral system. They ask people what they need and deliver, and one person wrote down rump steaks! They had to explain that this wasn't possible. It's impossible to know if everyone is really needy or just taking advantage.

I now do deliveries for our local food bank for the people who can't collect for themselves, but when I volunteered in the offices packing the bags up I became aware of a vast variety of clients. Most were really grateful for what they were given but some were asking for every possible extra that was available and would try to grab everything in sight.

People are referred and get a basic bag each week of their referral, but many of the donations don't fall into the categories of the basic bag, so are offered in addition, such as toiletries and some foodstuffs. We also get foods that are past their 'best before' date which clients can have if they wish. Obviously everything in the basic bag has to be in date. Yes there are some who may be abusing the system a bit, but most are in genuine need.

And you only need to look at the statistics

A large percentage of those referred to food banks are on means tested benefits but that does not necessarily equate to not working. It definitely equates to having lower than average income and it relates by area where rent is higher or pay is lower too

A large percentage of disabled people are also referred to food banks

And let us not forget that food bank usage rose in step with the cost of living crisis...

That all shows need

We have an estimated 40,000 babies and another 189,000 children all known to be in food poverty in the UK. None of which are ever responsible for the choices of adults and no one can say that those adults are making bad choices and not doing their best...

... Not without pure gossip anyway

Never discount how much stress and pressure things like Christmas puts on families... Some people go without for months

Christmas is a holiday everyone shares it should never be for just those who have more

If people cannot afford to celebrate a national holiday to a reasonable extent without being cold or hungry then that just shows you how broken this country is

Some people just do not know how to budget or prioritise.
I worked with older people for several years and some of them used to complain they were so hard up that they were freezing cold at home. I asked them “what about your winter fuel allowance?” They usually said they had spent it on Christmas presents (which is complete madness) and a few used to say they don’t ever see it because it goes straight in their bank! 🤣

Whilst I do not deny that there are some people who do not appear to need the food bank, there are so many more people who are struggling and find it difficult to even think of going to a food bank. I had a patch when my son was about 3 when so many things were going wrong and of course while you are down that is when it gets worse, so my washing machine broke down and I could not afford another one and was washing everything by hand. But whilst I did not want to ask for help there was no way that my child was going without food so I had to pocket my pride and ask for help. When things improved in my life I was glad to give some assistance in my turn. You do not know what it feels like until it happens to you. I have always been one who wants to pay bills on time not get into debt etc etc, but when you have a limited income and yet the prices of everything are rising week on week, you are already cutting out anything that might be called an extra so you have nothing else you can cut back on., you do not have that spare money for unexpected things and can only do the best you can and cope with the constant worry and edginess. Well unless you are the home secretary or others like her, I would rather accept that I might give something to someone who d oesnt need it , but I am sure that most of whatever I give is going to someone who really needs that help and I would much rather know that I want to , and intend carrying on, give to a system that helps so many people who are absolutely down. I believe we should help each other whenever possible, and perhaps those who state that they are christians might think of the samaratin as a model rather than the philistines.

Don't be so judgemental. She may have been embarrassed. Perhaps you are one of these people who have had a very charmed life with no adversity. Walk a mile in someone's shoes before you judge.

Unfortunately, some people have no idea how to prioritise their finances. When I was really struggling I went to a CAP Money course which helped enormously.
That Christmas my daughter still had Christmas presents, but I bought everything in charity shops using £10 I scrimped and saved. Her favourite gift was a board game in a very tatty box which we and her friends played lots of times over the next few years.
I was invited to a free weekly lunch group and got involved with helping others less fortunate than myself.
The next year I helped out at a Christmas Day for people on their own. At the end of the day, the chef made up food parcels for everyone and then arranged for a lift home for me because it was an hour's walk.
My circumstances have changed and I'm doing OK now, thanks to CAP and all the wonderful people I met.

There are greedy, dishonest people on every level of society, taking what they don't need, more than they can use, and not caring that they are depriving others. I would like to feel that they are in the minority, and that food banks and charitable organisations, The Salvation Army and individuals who are commited to helping people staring into the abyss are saving so many from despair. My Mother had a desperately poor start in life, and said without The Salvation Army, she and her siblings would never have made it through childhood. Her Father earned a decent wage for the day - none of it reached or benefitted the children.

marta74

I have seen people at the local food distribution centre, father don't work , three small children. Expensive mobile phones,driving a very nice car. Like the benefits system, this charity is abused by some.

The father may just have lost his job. Are you suggesting that they sell the phones they bought with earned income when he was in work? How will he get to interviews without a car, and how will he look for work without a computer or phone?

If we all put in, we can all take out. Nobody who has donated when they could should be shamed for getting help when times are hard.

Good answer Doodledog, I agree.
I would give the lady the benefit of doubt, first - there ARE people in need of food supplements, but I am aware that many of these people sacrifice eating over getting some pleasure out of life while they may be starving themselves. No one really wants to be a handout, they don’t want to admit it.

(but you can’t help wondering is this someone playing the system…?)

TV reporters are very savvy at getting reactionary statements out of people doing pieces to air. If it leads to an expose of some organization that is suspect of fraud, then it’s a path to either cleanup or close it.

I have seen people at the local food distribution centre, father don't work , three small children. Expensive mobile phones,driving a very nice car. Like the benefits system, this charity is abused by some.

I think it was grossly irresponsible of the TV channel if they doorstepped a recipient of a food parcel. What happened to privacy and dignity?

Should foodbanks have 'name and shame' posters with mugshots of everyone getting help, so that others can report those who have cars, holidays or get their nails done?

We never used to need foodbanks at all - it's shameful for the country that people need them in the first place, without adding shaming the users too.

The flip side looks like this

Food Banks are local community and people read things like this and are too embarrassed and ashamed to ask for help

Volunteering and giving to any such organisation should be done without judgement based on conjecture... Otherwise it just honestly seems an excuse to gossip

Sorry but this sort of thing annoys me greatly

I used to issue food vouchers and even though I used to ask some “in depth” questions we were still scammed .

My dad once won a holiday because he sold a particular brand of sweets in his shop.

Who says they paid for their own holiday? Could have been a relative, it could have been booked and paid for before a redundancy or illness

It is just conjecture and if your thoughts immediately go to worst case scenarios, some joy is missing from life somewhere

VioletSky

Erm

That reads to me like she prioritised loved ones and couldn't afford to eat herself

Which is exactly why food banks exist

We don't know if she spent a tenner or a hundred on Christmas...

But either way, she couldn't then afford to eat. That is the point of food banks...

Or should struggling parents buy their children nothing for Christmas?

Give for the sake of giving and knowing there are those in genuine need who would get no help if everyone stopped giving because "that woman down the road, bet she doesn't really need it"

Absolutely.

I dont really understand why food banks and also benefit claimants are targeted in this way, in my time I have met some teachers who are skiving, I have met people who work in shops who arent doing their jobs properly, I have met people who fiddle their expenses, I still think we should have teachers, shop workers and expenses.