It’s normal behaviour now and seen as a courtesy. I do have a hall chair but it’s hardly ever used by guests but we find it handy.
Good Morning Tuesday 12th May 2026
I understand that many people expect guests to remove shoes on entering their house. I have no objection to this and fully respect their request. However........... if this is important to them why do they not provide a chair / stool for their guests to use when removing and putting shoes back on ? I visited a new neighbour recently and it was clear what was expected of me - a large shallow tray to place outdoor shoes on . That is perfectly ok , but I had to bend down and found it a struggle to remove my shoes and replace them when leaving ( slip ons next time !) AIBU to think this? We don't expect our visitors to remove their shoes. I am uncomfortable in just socks ! Somewhere to sit in the hall when visiting people would make things so much easier!!!!
It’s normal behaviour now and seen as a courtesy. I do have a hall chair but it’s hardly ever used by guests but we find it handy.
I prefer people to remove outdoor shoes but do not ask them to do so, family do it automatically.
Grandchildren always sat or played on the floor so I didn't want them coming in contact where shoes had been.
My family all take their shoes off when they visit and we do likewise when we visit them. I always take my slippers with me when visiting someone else’s house.
And like whiff I always use a coaster both at home and when visiting and I expect others to do so when visiting me.
Like Bella23 taking shoes off when visiting, wasn’t a common practice in my recollection, but we did change to slippers indoors at home. Like others, I had designated indoor and outdoor shoes at my very particular school. DD2 and her DH often slip their shoes off here, but they’ve usually called after a woodland walk. I keep slippers at their house, as they take their shoes off and use slippers indoors, as does DD2’s family. However, when DD2 became a wheelchair user, we bought her a spare chair for indoors, so she didn’t roll ‘God knows what’ from her wheels around the house. Later, we ripped the carpets up and replaced them with wood.
Tradespeople seem to take their shoes off as a matter of course, even if invited to keep them on.
I do have a monks bench to sit on in my hall, which comes in handy.
I think the OPs problem was not taking shoes on and off , but the lack of a seat to help the procedure !
I never ask people to remove shoes. I have a vacuum cleaner and a mop, and doormats at outside doors.
I find it exasperating when I go to people's houses in groups (eg book club meetings) and we are asked to take our shoes off. It's not so bad when people are arriving one at a time, but when the meeting finishes there are a dozen or so 'older ladies' all bending over in a cramped hall, trying to lace up winter boots without falling over.
As others have said, if people have mud (or worse) on their shoes then of course they should remove them, but on the whole, after walking on a pavement and wiping feet on a doormat there seems to me really no need to take them off.
I don't ask anyone to take off shoes unless they are obviously dirty from being outside in bad weather. I do have a mat at the door, and ask them to wipe their feet, no-one objects
We always take our shoes off and any family visiting do so automatically and Vice versa if visiting them. Why would you want to walk into your house with shoes that have been on dirty pavements where dogs have had a wee and poo (even if picked up some remains) people have spit and worse, you don't know what you've stepped on.
Dd lives abroad and it’s normal behaviour to remove shoes. Many people have a basket of slippers for guests to use if they wish.
We always take ours off if visiting as do most of our visitors. All except one couple who never do. They say their shoes aren’t dirty. Of course they are, they have been used daily on the streets and if they wiped the soles with a damp cloth they would see how dirty they are.
We never used to remove shoes,
though one school friends mum always insisted shoes off way back in the 50 s snd i always felt it was strange but it’s accepted snd expected now.
I have a small shoe Horn which fits in my handbag - very useful.
It is an age thing . My DMiL who died earlier this year aged 98, used to receive visitors with a "come away in and keep your feet on!"
What's the point of dressing in your fancy party shoes if you have to shed them to reveal ice cold stockinged bunions.
I could barely suppress laughter when we were invited to DS proper first flat and asked to remove our shoes. The carpets were white and the only furniture were leather seats and a giant fish tank
Was this the very same human whose bedroom at our family home was practically impenetrable?
I always take my shoes off when visiting family or friends, all family and most of our friends take their shoes off when they come here.
When we have had parties/gatherings I wouldn’t expect people to remove their shoes, (many do though) I just give the carpet a quick clean with my Vax carpet cleaner the next day.
If someone was struggling to either remove or put on shoes I would get a chair for them.
I've posted this before in similar threads but when I was young my Dad was a GP and his practice was in our house. Over the course of a week literally a hundred patients would troop in and out. Our dining room was the waiting room and Dad's study was the consulting room. Taking shoes off was unheard of and never done. Somehow we survived!
I would never expect visitors to take off their shoes in my home. I do it when requested eg at my sons as they think shoes carry germs. It doesn’t seem to bother them though that the cats walk all over the work tops in the kitchen!
I have got wise to this eventually and always have a thick pair of slipper socks with non-slip soles in my bag. I sit on the stairs if there isn't a seat available, not much help in a bungalow though.
Come to think of it, the two places in rl, of homes I go into where it is requested, in both cases, the woman of the house is not British born.
Llamedos13
Here in Canada it’s a way of life and to come into someone’s home and NOT take off our shoes would seem strange.I do agree though that a seat is very useful.
Is it?[Canada]. I never knew that. Explains something. Never even thought about it.
I take my shoes off when I come in, walking over stream after stream of smelly wee from dogs as well as loose bits of mud and leaves etc
I don`t expect my visitors to take their shoes off, unless they have been for a walk but I never have to ask, they always do. I have quickstep flooring, carpet would be very different.
Some reason offended her🙄
We were never brought up to take shoes off when visiting I don’t know anyone who did We all wore slippers in our own home etc mostly for comfort and warmth I guess your status in life makes a difference I came from working class stock
(and proud of it) and no one had carpets just Lino and rugs
I live in a transient area so no neighbours to visit and all my good friends live one or two bus rides away so we always meet in the middle for meet ups I can’t remember the last tine I visited or had a visitor in my house apart from my family I ve never asked anyone to take their shoes off though
I always take my shoes off in someone else’s house, but I take a pair of light indoor shoes to change into. I’ve had them since we used to visit a lovely friend who preferred people to sit in their stockinged feet rather than bringing carpet slippers to change into, which for some people offended her! The shoes were a compromise. I’m not terribly fussy about it in my own house as none of our ground floor rooms are carpeted, but though I don’t insist on it, many, even tradesmen, do it as a matter of course.
I find it an odd thing but always remove shoes when requested. It is mostly younger people in my experience. Luckily there are usually stairs available to sit on
If they have a dog it’s welcome in my home. Just vac up any hairs when they leave
So the dog’s dirty feet and paws are ok, but a person’s shoes aren’t?
I would hate to reveal my ugly buniony shaped feet in someone else's house.. they look so much better enclosed in shoes!
I love tthat memory of taking ballet shoes to a party. At school we had indoor and outdoor shoes. The indoor shoes were proper leather shoes not plimsolls and were all bought from the uniform shop...which must have made a fortune.
Our carpets are very old..not antique just old and we have mostly sealed old floorboards in our Victorian house, so I don't worry about shoes on or off. I sit on the stairs to change out of my boots.
I wouldnt expect visitors to take their shoes off, but I would remove mine with no problem if asked when visiting especially if there is carpet and not hard floor. A bench to sit on would be helpful. Maybe I should take ballet shoes again.
To top it all when the hostess came to tea with us she didn't even offer to remove her shoes!
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