I am so lucky

A thoughtful thread. I too have many things to be grateful for - a loving husband, three children who are close, and enough money to be comfortable. I have step children who have always treated me well and I’m very fond of them, three biological and five step grandchildren. But I also have sadness, and sometimes, no matter how hard I try, the hard times seem to overtake everything else. I just want my family to be happy, and when thats not possible it breaks my heart. Thoughts to everyone with such worries, and of course gladness for those who are in a happy place. Merry Christmas everyone x

62dg -

With families, there has been some friction in several of the family circles I belong to over the years, & some "no-contacts". But the family where no-one has ever had a long-standing estrangement is my mum's, with 9 girls & 2 boys. They have argued, yelled & sworn when they are together for 60 years but..... they stick together & if anyone is ill or down on their luck or feeling left out, they all rally round.
I'm not sure if conflict is a recipe for happy families in general but it seems to have worked for them.
Good post, I too feel lucky in my family & many of the relationships I have now I'm older.

Kate1949 I often notice your posts and you are an inspiration to me, as indeed are many other posters.

As we get older we realise more than we ever did what is precious. When I was young I was carefree and foolish, somewhat unaware of people's feelings. But all that changed in an instant when I lost someone close. Now in my old age I count my blessings every day that I have a small family and we rub along pretty well. I am not wealthy but not poor either and enjoy giving what I can and seeing the pleasure it brings.

It is indeed a time to be grateful.

The thing I learned during the pandemic was that however bad thigs seem there is almost always a silver lining in every cloud.
Like in 2020 I have just learned that I will be alone for Christmas. In 2020 it was travelling restrictions preventing me going to my DD in Scotland. This time it's because I tested positive for covid last night. The positives? I don't have the 200 mile drive each way. I've already had a video call from DS and his family and will get one again on Christmas day. The negatives are logistical - presents here for the family that I was supposed to take, not only from me but also from DD who is flying in on Christmas day from Dubai. DD may be lacking some warm clothes which I was taking up for her but she'll have to wear layers. My presents are all in Yorkshire but I'll get them before the new year when they all visit on the way to stay with other relatives here in the South. Meanwhile on Christmas day I can eat what I want and watch what I want on TV for as long as I want.

I am grateful for video calls and the fact that I have a loving family who are concerned for my wellbeing. Let's all focus on the positives and be there for those who are struggling to find the positives in their lives.

The daffodil story has made me smile too , she sounds to be a remarkable lady , you are so lucky to still have her.
I had a happy and contented childhood , have a loving family and I consider my self very fortunate. DH Alzheimer's is causing some worry but he is physically very fit , things will get worse - I know that but for now all is ' well' .

Lovely to read all these posts and I wish I could add to the happiness that radiates. Sadly I have two daughters that no longer speak to me and this will be the second Xmas without them. To think two years ago we were a happy family of 14! I can remember thinking that was my happiest Xmas ever. I am glad I couldn’t see into the future. I am lucky to have another daughter and we are very close, she too like me is baffled and doesn’t know why her sisters stopped speaking to me. So I am hopeful this time next year I may have some resolution. I wish everyone a very merry Xmas

The neurodiversity in our family can make it quite challenging at times but on the whole, most of our blended family get on really well. I am grateful for the good times we have and try to put the times that aren't so good behind me. Family to me is the most important thing in my life and so I am more tolerant to things I wouldn't accept with anybody outside of it but if it becomes too much, I take a step backwards quietly until I find the resilience to carry on.

I'm so sorry for those of you who have encountered such difficulties in your lives, life seems very unfair at times. Reading these threads I realise I must count my blessings more with a healthy (ish) happy family who all get along together with only minor bumps in the road.
I hope we all have a good Christmas and 2025 brings better times

Kate1949

Most people go through crap. You are very lucky indeed and it's lovely. I don't see it as smug by most, just grateful maybe.

I try to be grateful I really do. My childhood was horrendous - violent, chaotic, abusive. My mother let a dentist take all my teeth out when I was 11 with no good reason. She died when I was 23, my sister was only 14 at the time. My brother took his own life. My nephew died of leukemia when he was 16. I was visiting him at the time and saw him die. I have alopecia, my husband has cancer. As Maw says for starters. I try to be grateful I really do. And I am. Sort of.

💕

Welcome!

I love GN, though I’m not as long standing as many here.

My life has been very up and down, like many of us, but I’ve been blessed with wonderful parents, fabulous friends, very annoying but good children and a husband of 30 years who does his best most of the time.

I am grateful and I’ve done my best to “give back” in some ways when able.

I was just thinking the other night how lucky I am. As I snuggled down in bed I suddenly thought of all the other Grans of my age trying to find a safe spot to sleep in the ruins of their wrecked homes in the war zones at present.
I've had a variably lucky life so far and really appreciate my current state. Things haven't always been particularly rosy though.

I am often humbled by stories of resilience and am uplifted by the advice and support given every day on GN.
Your story has touched me Kate1949, dealing with so many difficulties with such strength.
I have managed a few bumps in the road , as have so many of us, but I do have, as the song says, so much to be grateful for.

I too count my blessings. I have two wonderful children and two grandchildren who mean the world to me.
When we talk about childhood I usually say that my real life began when I was 17, that was when I met my husband. From that day in 1963 he was my world. When he died in 2021 I never thought I could survive without him but thanks to the support from Gransnetters and my family I am here to tell the tale.

Thankyou for this timely reminder to count our blessings.
I am grateful to GN for being such a wonderful support since I joined about 5 years ago.
At that time my DH was dying from cancer and undergoing painful treatment. As soon as I shared my
story, we were surrounded by warmth and love which has continued. It's 4 years since he died and I can still come here whenever I feel low.

Thank you crazyH you are very kind. I'm glad you had a lovely childhood. It may have stood you in good stead for your future difficulties. I wish you well.

Kate1949 - I always remember your story, especially the extraction of your teeth for no good reason. There was certainly something wrong with your mother. Life has dealt you some hard blows …… my childhood was almost perfect. Adulthood, not so. Btw I too had alopaecia areata, during a very stressful time in my life , but it did grow back.
You have a great attitude - no self-pity. Good wishes to you !

I meant to say people are very lucky indeed if they don't. It wasn't directed at the OP.

Most people go through crap. You are very lucky indeed and it's lovely. I don't see it as smug by most, just grateful maybe.

I try to be grateful I really do. My childhood was horrendous - violent, chaotic, abusive. My mother let a dentist take all my teeth out when I was 11 with no good reason. She died when I was 23, my sister was only 14 at the time. My brother took his own life. My nephew died of leukemia when he was 16. I was visiting him at the time and saw him die. I have alopecia, my husband has cancer. As Maw says for starters. I try to be grateful I really do. And I am. Sort of.

Many of us have sad things in our lives and you just never know because they tend to keep things to themselves. If I see someone being rude or unpleasant I tell myself not to judge. Different on these sort of online things because you can’t see faces or body language.
Sorry about your terrible experience Rosiesmaw

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

They say life is what you make it but I am well aware that isn’t always the case. I actually didn’t notice any smug or self satisfied comments, only gratitude.

Very true Tigerpaws.

Easily said when you haven't experienced the same cards