Why is 21st C life so stressful

Monica, my grandmother the same. How did they do it.? They deserved far more. Life's not fair. I get upset doing everything on line, but it's nothing compared to what previous generations went through. My niggle is the knack of community spirit, when it's my turn to go no one in my road sound know.

My son often remarks how easy our life has been if born In the baby boom age.
I felt the 50s were so quiet as a child when with very few able to drive and people obviously had had enough after the war years so were more sociable. Also, if one left their job they could usually find another job quickly.
Now there are too many on our island fighting for jobs which can be stressful.

I married in 1970 and advice on contraception wasn’t available, where I lived, unless you were engaged and about to marry.

CariadAgain I have to say that you are wrong in stating that there was no contraception prior to the 1970's and that women had no option but to have children.
My children were born before the '70's and were planned babies, three years apart.

Why the ?

Barleyfields

That was real stress MOnica. Rather like my many times great grandmother who had her baby baptised and buried her husband in 1809. I would say annoyance with computers, which pales into insignificance, comes from impatience. I had horrible stress when I was working - I can cope with computer saying ‘no’ now and again.

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The poster is correct it is draining and infuriating and goodness knows how people with additional needs cope. Whataboutism isn’t very useful. We are talking about the irritations of now.

Swings and roundabouts all round I guess.

In my mothers era (ie she was dating in the late 1940s through to early 1950s) the "rules" were very simple - ie "Nice women didnt - and nice men didnt ask" and so there was no chance of finding one had just been "used" for free sex. But, on the other hand, she was unfairly dismissed as soon as she married my father (ie because that's what the public sector did in those days) - although she did manage to get a private sector job to replace it (which she did until 3 weeks before I was born in the event).

However, a marriage before the 1970s meant you had no option but to have children - whether you had decided to or no - as there was no Pill or legal abortion. So I'd have had to be a "maiden aunt" or nun or something to stay safe from unwanted pregnancies.

I still think the 1970s to early 1990s constitute "Normal Times" - when we'd got the stuff we needed to live more comfortably but before all the "cuts" by the State and loads of scammers around trying to use our computers and phones against us to steal.

As a former personal secretary - I can sympathise with those being forced to use impersonal call centres and it drives me nuts being put through to them myself. I just want someone doing what I used to do - ie picking up the phone right away and trying to be helpful with "Hang on a minute - I'll find your file" or whatever was appropriate and = job done.

Allira, My father was a 'Man from the Pru' ! I remember him filling in his long black account book and visiting clients with him once or twice when I was young. I phoned the Prudential recently about savings for the grandchildren and they said I needed to do it through a financial adviser!!

It isn't.

I don't find the 21st century any more stressful than the 20th.

Perhaps because I can use a computer and rarely run into the difficulties you describe, which admittedly are infuriating.

When I run into them, I exit the site, and go back to it later, if it can wait. If it can't I simply phone and get some bright young man or woman to help me through the problem.

I understand your frustration with the digital world. I recently applied for a casual job as an exam invigilator but as it is in a school I had to fill out a form with my full employment history including all gaps when I was not employed. Apart from the fact that the form didn't have enough space for my extensive career, my computer skills are a bit limited so I lost the partly completed form once, redid it and got to the end then managed to lose it again. I finally completed it having worked out how to make extra space for the extra 20 years worth of employment history, and submitted it. I hope it was worth it as I lost most of a weekend on it! I've been retired for nearly 5 years but am needing to increase my income a bit with the way things are going. I didn't expect to have to jump through all these hoops ever again. Hopefully this will be the last time!

I despair!

Life was v hard for earlier generations.Was it more stressful though? After all the challenges they had were those previous generations had had & were shared by those around them.There must have been days where they were absolutely desperate, but did they have this constant background stress from needing machines to do every little thing, & from constant change & decisions & arguably living in a sharper elbowed society?

Although it has its virtues (we are all online here for example),I think technology has become a source of great stress for so many people these days. It’s as if it’s added another layer on top of all the other every day stresses that have always existed in one form or another. In our attempts to make things easier, we seem to have made a number of things a whole lot harder! On top of this, there’s the addiction aspect to a lot of online stuff, especially for younger people and those that are more vulnerable.
I don’t know what the answer is. I try to balance the amount of time and effort (and frustration) on these issues, with good old natural living, ie being in nature, having peace and quiet and having time away from screens.

We have life much easier than our grandmothers and great grandmothers
It's not stressful to me, stress is different for each person as is how we deal with it .

Franbern

I think that trying to compare the stresses of our g.parents, etc and our own is rather like comparing apples and pears.

Okay, I do not have to take in washing (when already doing it - by hand for my own family of ten children - like my East London g.mother), but there is no doubt that stress caused by modern, technological living has a great effect on our lives.

I am pretty fortunate in that my son-in-law living close by will come over (when he has time) to sort things out for me, but this week alone have had problems with my main television, - and, YES it is important to me as my main form of entertainment as I live alone.
Then my home contents insurance,which I would normally allowed just to automatically renew, changed companies and sent me an email saying it would take payment from a credit card that I no longer used. Could not amend this on line as the 'new' company had not yet set up an account for me. So, a telephone call. Five minutes replying with phone keyboard and 'We have now found all your details', then a wait to go to a person - where all my details had to be re-done 'so we can be sure we have the correct account'. All I wanted was to give them correct card number so they could get their money!!! He even asked me how I prefer to be addressed - and (exasperated), I said 'You can call me Beezlebub, if you like, just please take this new card number!!'. Took 20 minutes of my time to manage to do that.
Look back at my parents retirement in 70's 80's. Their retirement state pensions gave them enough to live on, with a holiday each year. They were well served and looked after by NHS, no central heating, but had those horrible parifin heaters which were cheap to run (and smelly), The flat was always warm. They had never learned to drive or owned a car, used free public transport. Television was simple, buy it or rent it, take home, plug into electricity, and use a cheap indoor aerial for their three or four stations. Yes, they had survived the serious stresses of the war and prior to that unemployment of the thirties, but their retirement was a very stress free time. (I think)!!!!!
I do love my technology -ALexa, Smarttv, Hive and central heating, wifi, the internet, smart phones, etc. etc. Fine - when all working, but as soon as something plays up, I yearn for a more simple life.

I agree, different stresses, but to some just as difficult

It’s very very frustrating! Bit not the end of the world! Chin up

I said 'You can call me Beezlebub, if you like, just please take this new card number!!'.
😂😂😂
Hope your telly is ok now, Franbern, we had problems a couple of weeks ago but we think it was to do with transmission.

Mr Brown from the Prudential,so much more friendly and reassuring than a computer or a phone call saying Press 1 to hear about our services, Press 2 for a quote, 3 for sales, 4 if you wish to make a claim or 5 to speak to an operator then 🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶 for half an hour.

I think that trying to compare the stresses of our g.parents, etc and our own is rather like comparing apples and pears.

Okay, I do not have to take in washing (when already doing it - by hand for my own family of ten children - like my East London g.mother), but there is no doubt that stress caused by modern, technological living has a great effect on our lives.

I am pretty fortunate in that my son-in-law living close by will come over (when he has time) to sort things out for me, but this week alone have had problems with my main television, - and, YES it is important to me as my main form of entertainment as I live alone.
Then my home contents insurance,which I would normally allowed just to automatically renew, changed companies and sent me an email saying it would take payment from a credit card that I no longer used. Could not amend this on line as the 'new' company had not yet set up an account for me. So, a telephone call. Five minutes replying with phone keyboard and 'We have now found all your details', then a wait to go to a person - where all my details had to be re-done 'so we can be sure we have the correct account'. All I wanted was to give them correct card number so they could get their money!!! He even asked me how I prefer to be addressed - and (exasperated), I said 'You can call me Beezlebub, if you like, just please take this new card number!!'. Took 20 minutes of my time to manage to do that.
Look back at my parents retirement in 70's 80's. Their retirement state pensions gave them enough to live on, with a holiday each year. They were well served and looked after by NHS, no central heating, but had those horrible parifin heaters which were cheap to run (and smelly), The flat was always warm. They had never learned to drive or owned a car, used free public transport. Television was simple, buy it or rent it, take home, plug into electricity, and use a cheap indoor aerial for their three or four stations. Yes, they had survived the serious stresses of the war and prior to that unemployment of the thirties, but their retirement was a very stress free time. (I think)!!!!!
I do love my technology -ALexa, Smarttv, Hive and central heating, wifi, the internet, smart phones, etc. etc. Fine - when all working, but as soon as something plays up, I yearn for a more simple life.

I agree with Allira and Ayse.

Sometimes computers/iT can so infuriatingly illogical!!

Maybe the stresses of trying to sort something out online these days is contributing to the mental ill health of the nation. I’ve never spent so much time using up so much emotional energy on resolving issues that should be a simple matter of talking to someone. Round in circles you go when you can’t talk to someone. Press 1 for etc…..
I’ve had some very difficult personal problems in my life but the stresses and strains caused by these issues was very different these issues caused by crap technology and saving money on customer care. It’s the powerlessness of it all.

Frustration and anger seem now to be a daily occurrence.

Thank your lucky stars you only have computer annoyances

But we don't know that.
There could be a lot going on in people's lives which are worrying, painful, distressing, so if dealing with everyday matters such as paying bills, sorting out insurances etc, is less than straightforward, it can add to the stress.
These things should be simple and straightforward. There were different difficulties to face years ago, but the Man from the Pru would come to your door every week or month, you'd pay him and he wrote it down in your book.
Simple.

Even I can remember thst from when we were first married!