Childcare expectations

I have told them I can’t do over night stays unless it’s an emergency. I want to be involved but I’m in and out of hospital and have organ failure. I want to enjoy my years of health . I don’t know how many I have . I love babies but I’m just too ill now . They are cross . Iv apparently ruined her gender reveal - which is next month ? ! By saying this . I think I might be ill that day .

Smileless2012

If your d.i.l.'s health is making it difficult for her to cope with the child they already have, why have another? .

Sorry posted to the wrong person . I worry about this but feel unable to say anything . It’s very difficult.

Smileless2012

If your d.i.l.'s health is making it difficult for her to cope with the child they already have, why have another? .

I think I read that ! That’s the thing we want a slower pace . And children are quick . This site has helped a lot Thankyou x

Grannytomany

I have 17 grand and great grand children so have done my share of baby sitting over the years. But I was always expected to always have the child or children overnight and regularly from Friday evening to Sunday lunchtime so the parents could have a break and a lie in after their night out. This seems to be the modern way. But when I was being expected to have a 6 month old baby (who still woke in the night for a bottle) and his 20 month old sibling who was also a poor sleeper I plucked up courage and said no, no more overnights. And although I offered willingly to babysit at their house so they could have an evening out, the parents took umbrage and never again asked me to have the children. I was a bit sad about that but I’d just got too old to be looking after children so young during the day and through the night up and down with them.

I’m so sorry to hear that . That is a lot to cope with there is no way I could . You haven’t been unfair at all . X

If your d.i.l.'s health is making it difficult for her to cope with the child they already have, why have another? .

They will get over it I think.
Look after yourself and enjoy your women's group.

Ironically, (if you read my comment on the other thread), the family we said "no" to when they asked about regular childminding visited yesterday. My son said, " why aren't you getting out and about more and going away and having more fun?"


He sees it now. This is our time whilst we still can and when our main responsibilities are over.
Of course he doesn't realise that we don't always want to be hopping off to different places these days!

Thinking of you.

I have 17 grand and great grand children so have done my share of baby sitting over the years. But I was always expected to always have the child or children overnight and regularly from Friday evening to Sunday lunchtime so the parents could have a break and a lie in after their night out. This seems to be the modern way. But when I was being expected to have a 6 month old baby (who still woke in the night for a bottle) and his 20 month old sibling who was also a poor sleeper I plucked up courage and said no, no more overnights. And although I offered willingly to babysit at their house so they could have an evening out, the parents took umbrage and never again asked me to have the children. I was a bit sad about that but I’d just got too old to be looking after children so young during the day and through the night up and down with them.

Hithere

You need to take care of yourself and you have the right to set your own limits.

I will be honest I find it very difficult to. Always have . But now I have to learn . But in a kind respectful way x

You need to take care of yourself and you have the right to set your own limits.

I don’t want to seem horrible . I love them dearly and will the new baby . But when it’s due we are on holiday so I can’t help .
It’s nice to know I’m not alone x

Wheniwasyourage

You have seen, and commented on, the thread started by Jules777, boo12. Take the supportive messages on that thread for yourself. We have all done our bit in the past, and should be aware of what we can or can't do as we get older. Stay strong!

I’m new and I have to say it’s been a shock seeing how common it is . I posted the thread and others popped up .
I had thought it was just me !

You have seen, and commented on, the thread started by Jules777, boo12. Take the supportive messages on that thread for yourself. We have all done our bit in the past, and should be aware of what we can or can't do as we get older. Stay strong!

Sorry it should say they find toddler behaviour difficult. Like running about and grabbing things .