You have to make a swift judgement call before wading in with any 'counter attack' either physical or verbal.I agree that sometimes a little old lady act may work, but in other cases it may spur them on to attack you as you seem weak.Doing nothing shouldn't be an option though, as others say, phone for help, dive into the nearest shop and get help [depending on the crime you witness.]Most verbal stuff you have to let go, particularly boys effing and blinding in bus queues.Even if we don't like it, we have to accept that f**k seems to be an everyday word for tons of schoolkids.I do think that women can get away with remonstrating with boys/men better than men of any age, less risky for us I mean.It has to be said though, that young people get very angry these days so very quickly[ actually there are some very angry older people about as well!]

And therein lies the problem Ana - the aggressors rights taking priority over the victims rights. The balance has to be restored.

I'm not sure if I have posted this before on this forum but here goes: I remember watching a programme where they were interviewing policmen from the 30s, 40s and 50s and asking them the difference between then and now. A few of them said that in those days, criminals would not harm members of the general public deliberately, if you were at home, they didn't break in and for that, the police felt a 'grudging respect' for the criminal. Now it just seems that everyone is afraid of being accused of 'hurting the feelings of the criminal' - I'd have them in the stocks and throwing soggy, rotten potatoes at them!

Yes, I agree that would be a good solution HollyDaze - in theory! Haven't such punishments been challenged as being 'too demeaning'?

Park wardens, Ana could patrol in pairs (and it would create employment) and would need to be given some power of arrest (walkie talkies or something to contact the police). Police should take loud-mouthed yobs seriously - it could be the catalyst for something much worse if it isn't dealt with.

Authority doesn't strike fear into these yobs because the fangs of authority have, largely, been capped. Start implementing proper punishments - three strikes and it's down to clearing chewing gum off pavements, picking up litter, painting park benches - anything other than a fine which most of them seem happy to pay.

But would park wardens be safe? And would the police be bothered to chase after a couple of loud-mouthed youths? Call me cynical, but I don't think any form of authority strikes fear into many of the youth of today, and of course they all know their 'rights'.

There was a time (pre-injury) that I would have happily confronted them and stood my ground but now, I know that would be foolish. My phone, on the other hand, would have been out very quickly if I had felt threatened in any way.

If I saw someone being attacked - again, I am now not able to wade in but the phone would be used as well as trying to get more able bodied people to help. We can all do out bit to help protect each other.

As an earlier post said - more beat bobbies and bring back park wardens to help keep the public safe.

I agree that intelligent avoidance can sometimes work. My son was in an uncomfortable situation, having unpleasant remarks directed at him in a station waiting room. He took out his mobile phone , gave a name and number and asked for immediate back-up from the nearest car in the area. Quite convincing as he too is a 6ft rugby player but very non-confrontational.
The lads scarpered!

So we can safely assume the little, old lady in the red coat who waded into a heist armed with only her handbags and saw off 5-6 potential robbers in motorbikes was neither Bags or Gaga

Tutting and rolling one's eyes is doing something. It is showing disapproval.

I wonder what the reaction would have been if the abuse had been racist? Would people still have ignored it? It is time that we all made it clear that this kind of behaviour whether racist/ageist/homophobic/sexist is totally unacceptable. Easy for me to say and harder to do I know, but I suspect I would have waded in and then panicked later. Maybe some of the young women who find feminism funny and old fashioned would like to do something about it. Maybe just everyone call 999 when you see it happening?? Do these people not have Mothers/sisters/grandmothers of their own? I remonstrated politely but firmly ( and loudly) with two teenage boys who were effing and jeffing in a queue at checkout in a supermarket. Everyone was tutting and rolling their eyes but doing nothing. I told them to be quiet or get out of the shop I was not going to listen to them. They shut up. High spirits and jokey comments are one thing, but aggression such as the blogger suffered is totally unacceptable.

Thanks bags - I am definitely weak when it comes to scary situations so appreciate your defence. (But I don't condone them either - the situations).

I was badly bullied physically as a child so think my lack of bravery stems from that. Discretion is the better part of valour and all that.

So, in effect, I'm doing the same thing as the blogger thought she was doing: defending the weak.

One hears loads of stories about non-confrontational interventions ending badly for the intervener. Self-preservation when scared is not a sin. Bravery is great but people shouldn't be blamed if they are not brave. That's all I'm saying. It is too negatively judgmental.

I don't think the blogger's intervention was confrontational either. Fat lot of good the intervention did, confrontational or not. And, no, that's not saying she shouldn't have intervened. But I reiterate that I think it is wrong to judge other people as "condoning" just because they don't intervene in a scary situation.

Intervention doesn't have to be confrontation, Bags as Experigran showed.

Seeing the weak being bullied physically is a completely different situation from hearing people saying abusive things. It is not even clear from the blog whether the schoolgirls even heard the unpleasant comments. My saying this doesn't mean the comments weren't bad or weren't sexism. Perhaps, deep down, I'm more cynical than some others and think that speaking to such toerags is a waste of time, as well as risky.

If I saw someone being physically attacked, I hope I would try to do something about it, even if it was only yelling for help. Fortunately I've never been in such a horrible situation and I hope I never am.

No blaming the victim, aka. I genuinely do not understand why she didn't step aside early on because I think that's what I would have done. I might also have looked crossly at the cyclist for riding on the pavement.

But then I also give way to aggressive walkers who don't budge an inch on a pavement and bear down upon one. It could have something to do with not living in a city or it could be that Thoroughly British Problem (so-called, or is it English? well, never mind) of being the sort of person who would say sorry to someone who stepped on my toe. I call it diffusing a situation. You can call it being cowardly if you like but that does not make it so.

janea, I don't agree that lack of disapproval is implied just because one avoids confrontation. In other situations people are criticised for "being confrontational".

Well said Elegran

That applies to many of us, and it is sensible, Gagagran but it is just as well that some people are prepared to step in when they see the weak being bullied. Otherwise there would be muggings and rapes in our towns in front of crowds of shoppers. Even in a busy city like Edinburgh, a young woman was dragged into a green space in the city centre recently and attacked in broad daylight. There were many witnesses! If they had all joined together to restrain her attacker, she would have been safe.

Now, in my late seventies, I live in a flat above an Indian take away on the High Street. The take away is run by a man, his wife and teenage daughter. he and his wife have limited English although the daughter is fluent. One night I heard a great deal of aggressive shouting down below. I am unable to see what is happening this side of the street as my window over hangs the pavement, but I feared that they were abusing this family and, as there is no exit at the back of the shop, I feared for their safety.

I decided to go down and look through his window in order to get help if they were suffering abuse. My door is tucked round the side wall of the shop and I stepped out right into the middle of a gang of teenagers. They were not in the shop as I had thought, but on the pavement outside. One was on the phone and the aggressive abusive language continued at top volume. Time for the little old lady approach!

I said very kindly, "My dear you seem to be in trouble, is there something I could do to help, maybe call the police for you?" "I'm on to the fing police, they won't listen" was the reply. I touched his arm gently and said that he should calm down think clearly what he wanted to say and then they would listen. He thanked me and did just that. I turned round and quickly went back upstairs. A policeman arrived almost immediately, probably because they had heard me in the middle of them.

I think you have to adjust your own behaviour and approach to the situation. My safety was my main concern and I would not have got myself into that situation had others safety not been of concern. Had I started to tell them off for being aggressive, I'm sure their reactions would have been totally different.

Well I own up to being cowardly and would always avoid confrontation in the kinds of situations mentioned above. It's nothing to do with condoning the behaviours, it's self-preservation.

I always told my son to walk away from confrontation and not get involved in any physical fights even though he was a strong rugby-player. I'd rather he was safe than brave with a knife in his ribs.

When I was in my late fifties I was under a great deal of stress. To cope I used to simply walk, power walk, for miles. One evening after such a walk, I had stones thrown at my legs by several young lads. I was so angry that I turned, shouted, "You've picked the wrong one tonight!" and chased them at full speed along the street. They ran as fast as they could. I shouted that I knew where they all lived and would tell their mothers. I saw them several times after that, but they never bothered me again. I think I frightened them more than they did me. I must admit that less adrenaline might have made a difference.

As we made our way to the back of the bus recently, Gs stumbled but didn't quite fall over. He was fine and sat next to his sister and me. Two teenage girls laughed and one called out 'He fell, he fell!' I turned and pointed out that he was only 4 and I thought she was being very unkind. A few minutes later as she was leaving the bus, she stopped and offered me a 50p piece to buy a sweet for the children. I told her that wasn't necessary but that I very much appreciated the idea. She smiled, said goodbye to the children and left, leaving us all feeling better.
It wasn't an aggressive situation but it was one where I didn't want the children to think that this was acceptable behaviour.

Sounds like you're blaming the 'victim' too...did she 'ask for it' perhaps?

I cannot understand that attitude Bags and I wonder how you would feel if you were to be verbally, or even physically abused, and people just stood and looked on or turned their backs.