No words.

JamJar, that is so very sad

So many sad losses here. Over thirty years ago a friend, a fellow Mum at the school gates lost her DD, she was 6 and had a brain tumour. There were Mums who could not deal with this and would cross the road to avoid speaking to her. Reading here some will know exactly how hurtful that must feel, I could not begin to imagine.

It's surprising how many people have suffered in silence with this very sad loss.
MiL had a daughter who died at 10days. I know she was called Jane but MiL never spoke of her I only know what DH has told me.

My younger daughter who has suffered several miscarriages plants flowers , after losing twins last year she planted two rose bushes , when living in Wiltshire she scattered poppy seeds on the plain

You are right, Luckygirl it will never go away. However I would hate to join the group mentioned, my grieving is done in my own private way.

Losing one child is bad enoigh, but losing a second... I cannot bear to think of those who have had to suffer all that yet again

to all those of you who have lost children. It never does go away I know.

Mine would now be in their early forties, I think of them, wonder at times if life would have been kind to them, would they have been healthy. I have no one to speak of them to now, their father died three years after they did. But I remember them

each year I remember my first born her birthday and anniversary 7 weeks later, she would now be 37 ...I was told go away have another child ...I did she stayed with me for 23 years..she would be 35...I have only just been able to scream and sob,,triggered by my OH illness,it would have been easier if I could have cried,now the healing is starting..my son thee youngest grieves for the sister he grew up with and the one they never met.

My Mum talked incessantly, to us her children, not our Father, about the stillborn baby (whisked away, she never saw the baby) in the last few weeks of her life. I managed to find where the baby had been buried and we visited there. She had never mentioned the baby until I think she knew she was dying and sadly my parents could never talk to each other about their loss.

When you lose a child or grandchild you find out who your real friends are. It's surprising those who think it's contagious.

I agree with Alice 100% - ditch them and stick with those who stick by you. A friend in need is a friend indeed.

You are absolutely right Luckygirl. I will never get over the death of my much loved grandma. Last Friday afternoon I was busy in the kitchen and suddenly felt really tearful. I know it sounds crazy but I could faintly hear the theme tune from The Chase playing in the distance and the memories of my grandma and our Friday afternoon teas came flooding back.

It is never too late to grieve for anyone, baby, child or adult. As long as that loved one is in our hearts, then we will grieve.

What a lovely blog. It made me feel all shivery and quite sad.

My grandma gave birth to a stillborn daughter whom she named Elizabeth, when she was in her late 40's. The baby was full term and my grandma blamed herself for the babies death all of her life. She said that she was so ashamed to be pregnant at that age and despite her strong catholic faith she admitted to having times, particularly at the beginning of the pregnancy, when she wished it would all just go away. My grandma experienced a great deal of trauma during her pregnancy. One of her close friends took her own life and my grandad had a major heart attack. Both events no doubt played a part in the loss of her baby.

My grandma talked about this right up until she died this year.

What a very moving piece. I am in tears. My Mum had a full term, stillborn son a year before I arrived. Whenever she spoke of him she became very emotional - something I did not understand as young girl, because she had me, didn't she? After she died I found a pile of letters and cards she received at the time which she kept bound together in a blue ribbon - her memories of my brother, who she named Martin.