Men in their 60's and younger want younger women usually. Nice to read that so many women have such a positive experience of long marriages, that they dont want to repeat the experience, so glad I never bothered.
When I did decide to try a relationship I was quickly cured by the automatic dis-respectful attitude to women, that seems to be so prevalent in alot of men, even when they hardly know you.
I dont fancy men in their 60's etc. attraction is about looking at someone attractive and sexy and a pleasure to experience - I subtley notice attractive males and with dignity - leave it at that.

That's hands clapping, Lona. I like your reference to a special friend ?

Bellasnana ??
rubylady I agree about society's expectations.
Lona ? ?

I think young relationships are about chemistry and older relationships are about common interests. My ex and I are both in new'ish relationships. He is riding round on motorbikes with his new partner, [also an adrenalin freak]something I could never get to enjoy. The S.O. and I go shopping, go to nice cafes for coffee and cakes,walk on beaches a lot and watch sport together.I certainly wouldn't have wanted this due to the trauma it cost all of us at the time, but we are both very content with our lives now, and we all, actually get on well. I did join a singles group 15 years ago, not with the intention of meeting someone but just to get out and meet people in general and another group that involved phoning people up didn't work for me; in fact it was horrible. I didn't have internet back then but, if I was 15 years younger and in the same position I probably would give it a go. Although I bet that older internet dating men are still looking for women 10years younger#somethingsneverchange

lizziepopbottle I could have written your post after the part about your relationship with your husband (mine was a bully).
I love living alone and have done for most of the last 24 years. I don't have a dog to cuddle though, so I make do with a special friend
I don't think there are many gems out there either.

Always pleased to read about those who found happiness via Internet Dating Sites but l sadly did not so after many scammers, who thank goodness never quite managed to scam me, although many tried hard too, now 3 yrs on and now aged 70 l have given up. Now days prefer to stay with my known friends within my local Church and enjoying my various interests and lovely holidays.
Never the less to all those who may sometime in the future decide to give it a go....
GOOD LUCK!!

I know it sounds as if I'm condemning all men of our generation as reactionary old fuddy duddies looking for a surrendered wifey... but men of our generation were probably set this example by their own fathers. I've read posts from the guys on GN and they do sound quite liberated but they're bound to be taken and pretty special, too, to join and contribute to a forum that's mostly women! I don't think there are very many gems out there to justify the search and so I'm happily single ?

Why is it seen though in society as though you are not whole if you are not with someone? I love being single and have done for a long time now. I would not like, at this stage of my life, to find anyone. I enjoy my own company and like lizzy says, I too do not want to wash anyone's boxers or slave over the stove to cook their tea anymore.

I have loved, of course, but it would take a very special person to take me on now, with my illnesses and needs, so I am probably better off tending to myself. That way I can decide if I want to have tea at tea time or go to bed for an hour. So no, I wouldn't try internet dating, been there in the early days of post divorce, never again. Very happily single.

As a fairly recent widow, I agree with everything lizzypopbottle said.

An ex work colleague met and married her FOURTH husband via internet dating!

I am single (widowed over 8 years ago) and was married only once and for 33 years. I wouldn't want another partner for several reasons. Some of my reasons are altruistic and some are downright shallow!

I think it would be very hard to establish with someone new the sort of relationship I had with my husband because we started out together at age 20 and lived and grew together in love, respect and trust over those 33 years.

My husband worked hard (worked himself to death wouldn't be an exaggeration). He left me comfortably off and the provision he left behind will be mine and our children's. I would never risk another man having any claim on that.

I don't need anyone to look after me. I can turn my hand to most jobs around the house and can call on two sons, a daughter and a son-in-law or get someone in, at a pinch.

I've had my fill of washing, ironing, cooking, cleaning and 'being there' for someone else. In other words, I don't want to look after anyone now my husband is gone.

I have friends and family so I'm not often lonely although I do go short of hugs sometimes but my dog is a real comfort and he expects nothing in return.

I'm not sure people are honest about themselves on dating sites. If there's no photo, there's a reason... You've heard the saying, ' You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your Prince.' I'm not willing to kiss any middle-aged frogs. If I was honest on a dating site, certainly about my age (64) I'd have to expect men of a similar age to contact me (if anyone did)...nuff sed! (This is my shallowest reason! And, yes of course, I'm devastatingly attractive myself ?)

I've always been independently minded and I suppose I've become even more self-sufficient since I've been widowed. I please myself and I'm happy. I don't have any need to start again with someone new. I might sound hard as nails. In some ways I am but I'm soft as clarts (NE saying) about my family.

I honestly don't think I could be bothered. Even if I wasn't married, you never know what you might end up with.

Happily married but if I did find myself single I wouldn't look for another partner.

However, I have a friend who was widowed at 51 who joined an Internet dating site a couple of years ago and after meeting a few oddballs is now in a happy relationship with a lovely man.

No its not for me, should anything mean I was single again I would be happy to remain so. I acutally enjoy my own company and that of my family and friends that would be enough for me.

Nothing wrong with trying it and its a way to expand your friends group but its not for me.