I want to help.

You sound very caring. Personally I wouldn't give her money. Sometimes when you help people out with money, they keep coming back for more. I would find another way to help her.

As kind hearted as you seem you should not become involved in any way with this person. You are basically going against the agency decisions if you assist her financially.

I don't think anyone has judged Amiral5 but offered advice. I have to agree with most of the other posters and say that the OP should definitely NOT give money to this lady. there may be reasons unknown to her why the charity she helps at isn't giving help promptly.

Absolutely not. You are considering breaking the boundaries of your contract with your charity. The boundaries are there for a reason. If you start helping this poor lady personally on an ad hoc basis, it would not be unreasonable for her to expect you to help her in the future. Her needs could become unreasonable and I don't necessarily mean financially. She may come to rely on you emotionally. Inevitably her demands may slowly become
more than you can cope with and you have to let her down. Imagine the further distress to both of you when this happens. Boundaries are important to protect everyone concerned.

Sad as it is I wouldn't be handing over money in that way. She must be receiving finance of sorts, benefits ? If so, I would have thought that she'd be exempt from paying rent/rates. Wouldn't anyone else go to the DWP or CAB for help ?
Can you ask her if she's getting all the benefits she's entitled to ?

If you know she has bills to pay, could you not go with her to pay the bills, rather than giving her the money which might not go where you intend it to?

You obviously have a very kind heart, but as others have said, please please don’t hand money over to her. It won’t stop there, you have said her family is dysfunctional, I would Be very worried if word got out to them, then they may take it upon themselves to badger you for the same handout. I would also imagine that you would be told to leave your place with the charity as I’m sure this would be a massive no no with them.

You sound like a wonderful person with a wonderful heart, but I really think you should not give her money directly.

* Amira15* - I don’t think everyone is judging this person. I’m certainly not but would say that having spent a fair chunk of my working life supporting marginalised and disenfranchised people in similar situations it is not a good idea to become personally involved as in this way it can be seen as a kind of favouritism.

Surely the original poster’s charity is one of many in the area? Or beyond? Maybe a referral can be made to one that will help her in other ways and within their remit. For example, for short term one-off help around housing in particular, a referral to the “Vicar’s Relief Fund” maybe - or if children are involved, “Banardo’s”. There are lots of charities around offspring of regiments or with a specific connection to a particular trade.

Maybe you could help by undertaking a charity search according to her needs?

grannyactivist does have a way round giving cash by paying a bill directly - but if you are working with a charity that may well see this as “getting too close/involved”.

I have to admit that when I worked face to face with people as you are doing, more than once I gave to a charity that helped people with the problems I was seeing in my own clients.
This at least means you are helping “someone like her”

I hope you find a solution to your dilemma. Good luck.

I agree with all the other comments, please don’t give this lady any money and don’t get involved.
My husband runs a charity helping the homeless and despite me telling him not to, he has over the last 2 winters begged, tents, clothing, sleeping bags and food. He is now realising no matter how much you do for these ‘chaotic’ people you cannot win! They sell the tents and sleeping bags, clothing goes to a shop that buys them they get £3 for a big black bin liner full. They also stop people in the street trying to sell the toiletries they’re given. The clothing was put on a table so they could help themselves but now a note is made of what they’ve been given and they have to hand back the dirty sleeping bags to get another.
I’m not saying that they are all like that but sadly the majority are! In these 2 years they’ve only managed to get 1 man, an alcoholic, on the right road! These people soon realise when they find a softie and how to manipulate you.

I also volunteer for a local charity which helps families and individuals in need, and understand how hard it is not to become involved with some of the clients, especially those who you form some sort of connection with. Our charity NEVER gives cash to anyone, as you just cannot know how it will be used. We do offer supermarket vouchers as well as vouchers for the local food bank, help with bills and school uniforms, furniture, carpets and white goods, so our remit is extensive, but we have thresholds and if it looks like any particular client may be abusing our help it is discussed by the visiting team and limits are set. We frequently refer clients to CAB or a local financial advisor to make sure they are claiming all they can, and will sometimes make our help conditional upon them seeking financial advice. But please do not put yourself in the position of being this lady’s personal benefactor - you cannot solve her problems single handed, and may lose your volunteer role if you do this.

I'm wondering Dawn, if your organisation is to give people fairly quick help early on and this lady has longer term needs.

I know its tough but I suggest writing a list of helpful agencies and giving them to her. If you felt it was appropriate, you could provide some bus fares yourself and accompany her.

Perhaps you could help this lady find some other charities that might be more able and willing to help her than the one were you met her.

I used to work for citizens advice and part of my role involved working with the local food bank. It was my decision as to whether a food parcel was issued or not and this was within quite strict guidelines.
I absolutely understand why you feel that this person needs your help and that the charity isn’t covering it, I felt like that about a couple of people I met and felt the charity could do more. The trouble is that you are rarely seeing the whole picture.
Although it seems to you that she is genuinely in need, there is a whole other story that you don’t know and that is the reason she isn’t being given any more help.
Clients have to be taking and acting on advice and help given by the charity and often clients don’t do that because it’s easier to let the charity do all the work. They end up treating the charity like a supermarket!
You also have to consider that charities have a responsibility to their donors and people who misuse the service can leave donors feeling that their donations are being used fraudulently.
There is a lot to consider here, but please don’t hand over any money personally.
If she needs help my best advice is that you can direct her to citizens advice or step change and they will help, but it may well be the case that she has been ‘through the system’ and doesn’t really need the help you think she does.
You clearly have a good heart, but take it from me, things are rarely as they are presented to you and sadly people can be very manipulative if they think you are an ‘easy touch’.

I hope this isn't the charity you work with, but could you possibly refer her to Christians Against Poverty, as they don't just help people of faith?

capuk.org/about-us/the-cap-story

No, please don't.

I used to work for health visitors in my town and they'd sometimes write to a local charity on behalf of a needy mother and/or child. Smallish amounts like £50 for a cot. I asked if they were ever tempted to pay personally and they said no absolutely not. You keep it professional. Off the book payments could be misconstrued, you might have others putting their hand out, the original donee coming back for more, etc.

Could you not give the £200 to the charity you work for?

Please don't do this because as you may be helping her in a way you are breaking the rules of your organisation and you won't be able to sleep with that on your conscience and that isn't fair to you. Once you cross that line there's no going back so you will either be out of a job or lying to your colleagues and superiors. That doesn't make for peace of mind .

You seem to be a compassionate woman, which does not mean naive. You believe her plight to be genuine but I would tread carefully as other Gransnetters suggest. If it is possible to pay some outstanding bills anonymously or have groceries delivered to her home, again anonymously, then that appears to be best all round. She may have unscrupulous family members who could then see you as a soft touch when all you are is a person trying to do the right thing and help someone on their knees. I salute you..

Definitely a bad idea.
And probably would mean you would no longer be able to volunteer with the organisation.

Good post Missfoodlove please please Dawn listen to people who really are giving you good advice, it has nothing to do with unkindness I m almost certain your charity has very good reasons why they are not continuing to help this lady Charities are not set up to be cruel or uncaring to one particular person in need but rules are there for a reason Support her, be kind and caring towards her but don’t be an enabler to her or her dysfunctional family
You must have had your own doubts or you would not have asked on here

Many posters seem to think that not giving money, groceries etc is unkind.
I think you need to take a step back and think carefully.
A charity relies on volunteers and donations, it will operate in a fair and honest way, if a volunteer is giving special attention to one particular client that is wrong. If a volunteer starts to hand out money to clients
imagine trouble it could cause.
It is very probable the charity has information that the volunteers are not part to.
Going off piste and doing your own thing could cause huge problems that long term could damage the charities reputation and this could lead to a downturn in donations and volunteers.
I have personal experience of voluntary work, I did however have weeks of training and good support.
It seems to me the OP has perhaps not had such a good induction.

I would definitely not give her any of your money but help her navigate through the benefits system, perhaps using CAB and get her help this way. Then you have a clear conscience but acknowledge that she is an adult and has the ability to find help for herself that she is legitimately entitled to.

oh no sorry, do not go down the road of handing out your own money

I think that there are other issues here, too, and data protection would be one of them. You are not supposed to search the records for peoples='s addresses so if you were found to have accessed her address without a reason to do so it could come down both on you and on the charity. If you knew where she lived by other means if you really felt it was the right thing you could send a supermarket gift token, I have personally helped someone whose benefits were not being paid and she genuinely was in a dreadful situation
The other thing is to do with data protection, there may be something which others in the charity know but they cannot tell you as it is confidential so they couldn't tell you.