Spoons and forks

Dilemma: having been brought up to say toilet, lounge, serviette, settee etc. would it be betraying my roots to change to lavatory, living room, napkin and sofa?

Incidentally, the plans of our house call it a lounge and we went from lavvy to toilet all those years ago in an effort to be refined.

Advice please from all those 'U' gransnetters out there.

Haha, petallus I can't help you as I do half of what you do so I'm only half-U

toilet, sitting-room (front room more often in Scotland), napkin, settee.

Hm. I think I like the half-U idea.

I think you'll find I invented it, Bags - if you look back a few posts....

Oh no, just checked, I was half non-U!

It must have sneaked into my subconscious, nag, and popped out again. I will never use the term again without acknowledging its inventor: Nag-a-ram

You're just out to confuse me and get me into trouble for getting my references wrong, aren't you?

Say whatever you like and stun people with your intelligence- that's what I do

No, I just don't like people taking credit for my original thoughts, which I then discover were not mine at all, and even worse, weren't even the same!

Way to go, grannylin!

At meal times with my DGC we are not allowed to mention pudding until everyone has finished their first course. If anyone mentions that word too early they get shouted down and told that they can't have any. Usually Grandad winds everyone up by asking what's for pudding then pretending to be horrified and upset that he can't have any So now it's always known as the "P word"

Love that story, yoga

My sister had a similar rule when she was eating at my mum's house with her kids. So her clever eldest child took to sweetly asking grandma if there would be "sumpin' else" when she'd emptied her plate

If we had the temerity to ask what was for pudding at our paternal grandmother's house the answer would always be: "Wait and see," or "Never you mind." The anticipation nearly killed us - especially as the puddings were sometimes what we would secretly describe as "disgusting".

I do however find myself behaving in a similarly outrageous fashion when the grandchildren ask what's for pudding. But I temper the surprise by saying "it is definitely something you both like" which seems to satisfy their curiosity.

Incidentally, one would never ever ask a hostess at a dinner party "what's for pudding?". So early training on this little slice of etiquette probably does not go amiss.

I am happy to say that there were no daft rules about mentioning pudding in my childhood - mainly because there usually wasn't any! We got rice pudding after Sunday dinner (not lunch, it was the main meal of the day), and tinned peaches and Carnation milk at Sunday tea.
For several years after the war we had very little cutlery or crockery - I remember drinking tea out of a jam jar.
I have no patience with nit-picking about what to call everyday things - who cares, as long as people understand you?

Our favourite pud in those years of austerity was mum's chocolate pudding: Bird's custard with cocoa added with some raisins or sultanas.

Oh dear. I was just expressing an opinion!

petallus oh yes, I remember my mother desperately trying to get us to say "toilet" and not "lav", and the more my poor old dad persisted, the more she nagged. He had a barber's shop, and she kept trying to make him call it "the salon" too.

At granny's house we were convinced that there was a pudding called 'waitandsee'.

So was everyone else, ariadne. I don't think you're being got at. x

Exactly, bags - everyone is entitled to their opinion. I suppose I just feel there are so many serious problems in the world that I have lost patience with trivial matters! Sorry if I upset you, Ariadne.

When my auntie moved to a brand-new 'bought house' from rented property, the front room (as she used to call it, as do I still) changed into the lounge. Auntie M was an absolute star and could always be relied upon to use the wrong words for all sorts of things eg "What a perfect vintage point it is here!" I hasten to add, that because I use 'front room' instead of lounge/sitting room/drawing room, I don't think any of the latter are wrong...oh dear, I'm getting into a tangle now! Anyway, my front room is also my bedroom when the other 'arf's snoring becomes too much!

I have a front room (for best) and a back room where I live most of the time when I'm not in bed - in the back bedroom! My granny had a drawing room, only used when the minister came round, and a parlour where we all gathered.

I see your point about trivial versus serious matters Greatnan but I also think this is one of life's great dilemmas.

Should one worry about which fork to use at a posh dinner, getting exactly the right shade of Farrow and Ball for the living room or whether or not leggings are suitable for the over 50s when children are starving in Africa?

Is it okay to give to an animal charity or campaign to save the badger when money is desperately needed for cancer research?

I don't know the answer but I'm sure I shall enjoy seeing my friends for coffee later this morning in spite of all the suffering in the world.

I hope that didn't sound pompous

I serve pudding and lay my table with napkins and a pudding spoon and fork. Strictly speaking pudding and dessert are different, the latter being fruit and nuts served after the table has been cleared. However, as Americans don't talk about pudding, but desert, cookbooks (which need to sell in the US as well as in the UK because of the production costs) always talk about desserts – even if the desert in question is bread and butter pudding, brigade pudding, queen of puddings Christmas pudding, Eve's pudding, halfpay pudding, summer pudding, Queen Mab's pudding, rice pudding…