Lil's Bar 2

It's so good to note that Lil's bar is making a brave effort to prepare for the most disgraceful inn of the year award.

I don't think pete is skint ella ,I just think he enjoys rooting around in his pockets,it is a habit he has acquired rather like a nasty twitch,I think it started when matron was heard to mention about conducting a FFI test...or perhaps he is merely re-arranging his furniture..
maybe pete or gramps have taken to wearing lipstick..
If the missing marigold comes to light could you please hang it on the hook in the kitchen,to comply with hygiene regulations and food handling..

Thanks, Pete, you don't look so bad yourself - not sure about the Brylcreem'd quiff though, it seems to be attracting the midges....

Cheers Ella (only a couple? after all I've done for your back!) Oh well better than nowt. Ana you look stunning tonight......

Nasturtiums again, Ella! The lipstick on those glasses is 'Trollop Red' not 'Innocent Peach', which is of course what I wear. I left it to the guilty party to clear up his their own mess down there - goodness knows what's been going on since that lock-in the other night...

Pete I've left you a couple in, as you're obviously skint by the way you keep rooting in your pockets

Billiards anyone?

There's a lot of empty glasses down the cellar, most of them have got Ana's lipstick on them! She's a proper little alky tinker when she gets going!

gramps is still down there, lying on the floor moaning something about his torch not working now matron's been been pressing the button too hard, and one of the rubber gloves is missing

Did I hear that a stranger was getting them in?? in that case I'll have a double...thats two pints

x 100

Huge welcome back Smoluski Your wit was sadly missed!

There was a matron called nellie
Whose chest used to hang past her belly
Imagine her pain when it started to rain
She managed to tuck one in each welly..

A Laydee got caught in the rain,
Somulsky we heard was her name,
She vanished by night,
Gave poor Pete a fright,
The laddy,s forgotten 'Er name!!

gramps do you have a prolapse ?think matron better have a quick shuftie .....torch please...rubber gloves....brace yourself gramps

gramps look after our Nellie...I'm off to upload a pic that I painted for Gally Have been asked to add it to the album.

Motion for "prolapse" to be accepted as being a legitimate word for use in Lil's Bar!

Hands up please, and all in flavour say "on yer bike!"

Absolutely! I think it would be good exercise if we all learned to 'strip the willow' - you need bags of energy for that dance...and the wearing of a kilt [for the boys] is essential...

Peckish is a good sign...but I'm not sure there's much in the way of wholesome sustenance in here. I wouldn't go near those nuts, anyway... Tripe and underpants onions, perhaps?

Is that accompanied by a highland fling soop

This calls for a sing-song.

Here we are again - happy as can be -
All good friends and jolly good company.
Never mind the weather
Never mind the rain
As long as we're together -
Whoops she goes again.
Lah de dah de dah
Lah de dah de dee
All good friends and jolly good company....

S*d the medication pour me a big one as well whoever is nearest the white wine,anything to eat in here am feeling a bit peckish all of a sudden...

Hooray!
Your very good health, nellie!

Lil said you can borrow her old pair of drawers soop and wave them if you like...not looking at the floor you lot can do no wrong today....drinks are on lilxxxx

when

Yes, big welcome soop. then how about we all skedaddle out of her way when she sees the state of the floor in the snug!

Deep breath. A certain laydee name Smoluski [was Nellie] is back in the gang. When she pops in for a drink I suggest we all give her an amazing welcome. Wish that I had a big flag to wave!!!

Right Lilly I'll lock the door....and we can get on the pool table...best of five?