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My Mother's Lips

(18 Posts)
Flowerofthewest Fri 06-Dec-13 10:22:05

How on earth do I persuade my mother that less is more and NOT to use the garish bright red lippy that she wears. It is also put on crooked because she has AMD and will not accept or admit that she cannot see very well. I have bought her lighter lipsticks (not pale) and she has not used them. It is a shame, she dresses well but does not notice the stains on her clothes, maybe where she has spilt a drop of tea etc. She is outgoing and walks to the town every day to meet friends for coffee and a moan chat. But the lipstick looks terrible. My sister will be more direct than me at Christmas when mother goes to stay. She said that she will say how much younger a lighter lipstick looks and that bright red is ageing. Mum is very very concious about her age. Her name seems to be "I am C..... I'm 87 you know" that is her middle name now. Bless her cotton socks - although she would never be seen wearing them.

Nonu Fri 06-Dec-13 10:51:01

You can"t really ! if it makes her happy leave her be !!


annodomini Fri 06-Dec-13 10:56:40

An aunt of mine used to wear a deep red lipstick that made her look far older than her years. But it was so much part of her that no-one would have suggested a change. If your mum is attached to her lippy, flower, leave her be. She probably wouldn't be happy with anything else.

JessM Fri 06-Dec-13 11:00:02

Has she already got a really good magnifying mirror with a light? xmas pressie?

Agus Fri 06-Dec-13 11:28:24

Possibly your mother sees this as part of her identity Flower and something she does not want to lose.

Just a thought, is there anyway she would go along with you to one of the stores who offer free make-up lessons and maybe take the advice of a beautician?

Flowerofthewest Fri 06-Dec-13 12:00:15

Oh OK you lot. I will try to ignore the Flippin Lippy grin

Maggiemaybe Fri 06-Dec-13 12:37:39

It's lovely that she wants to keep the style she's used to. The mirror idea is a good one, though. wink

Flowerofthewest Fri 06-Dec-13 13:12:35

It is a VERY crooked style though and she would take the idea of a magnifying mirror as an insult sad

JessM Fri 06-Dec-13 13:36:44

grin well some of us have been using magnifying mirrors since we were about 45...
If one was cast away on a desert island which 3 grooming products... toothbrush, magnifying mirror, comb

Couldn't you claim that you had found yours an absolute godsend ?

(the downside is that one sees the wrinkles etc)

annodomini Fri 06-Dec-13 13:49:43

You can get a very pretty pocket magnifying mirror in John Lewis. I gave my DiL one as a birthday present and she loves it.

Iam64 Fri 06-Dec-13 13:53:18

my my JessM - did you hang out with my mother? In my rad fem days, when makeup was just not part of my wardrobe, she frequently told me that if she was ever sent to a Desert Island she would take mascara, rather than lippy as emphasising the eyes was particularly important.

Anne58 Fri 06-Dec-13 14:21:43

Speaking - I'm 55 you know- personally I wouldn't be able to put my eye make up on without a magnifying mirror, and quite a strong one at that. (There was once a harrowing incident when I looked into the mirror with my glasses on, don't try this at home).

I have also recently changed my make up habits of a lifetime and switched to brown eyeliner and mascara instead of black. It just looks softer some how. But I do appreciate the difference between making a decision yourself, and following someone else's advice.

Now, if someone could just help me down from this fence and check my bottom for splinters....................

kittylester Fri 06-Dec-13 14:29:54

I understand the spots of tea etc Flower. My Mum would have killed any of us for daring to go out with less than spotless clothing but, even before she descended into dementia, her answer if any were pointed out on her clothes would be, 'It's only tea!' or 'Well I can't see anything!' and it made me sad to see her like that. And, as for mis-applied red lipstick, as we sisters? confused

FlicketyB Fri 06-Dec-13 15:40:55

.... and I hope she wears lots of bright colours and to hell with it. If that's what she wants to do, let her do it. But getting a good mirror and light so that she can get it on straight sounds an excellent idea.

Lona Fri 06-Dec-13 16:03:45

Just don't tell her that it's a magnifying mirror!
That'll give her something to think about while she's applying her lippy!

GadaboutGran Fri 06-Dec-13 16:07:30

Might she be doing it because she knows it annoys you?

shysal Fri 06-Dec-13 16:15:21

On my desert island the mirror would have to come with tweezers! You don't mention a hairy chin, maybe that would be worse than the lippy, so look on the bright side!

numberplease Fri 06-Dec-13 16:52:08

My second daughter, when in her late teens and early 20, used to wear blusher put on a bit too liberally, on what I thought was a daft part of her face, but as she was apt to get stroppy when criticized, I said nowt. Imagine her wrath when her auntie told her about her wedding!!