Name that person.

We have 'Kilt Woman' and 'Kilt Woman's Husband', also a lady we call 'May my horse smell your bicycle?' Because that was the first thing she said to DH when she meet him. We don't know why.
When he was at work some of his staff used to refer to me as Delia as they thought I looked like b Delia Smith. (I don't!)

I forgot Llama Lady. She lives along the road and keeps - alpacas. However, she looks like one of her pets and Llama Lady is more pleasingly alliterative. I do introduce her as llama Lady, safe in the knowledge that she thinks I am referring to her pets rather than her face!

Blimey.

I must be fodder for my neighbours.

Like the thread.

One of the regulars on the station for my morning train to work is known as Giraffe Lady ever since she won.a 5 foot high toy giraffe in a raffle. She spent the next few weeks trying to persuade someone to adopt it with no sucess. One poor man who she was particularly insistent with resorted to hiding and running on to the station when the train arrived.

Love this thread

We have a chap who lives near us and when he walked past the gates one day, my eldest GD (at the time, she'd have been about 6 years old) said 'nanny, Roy Cropper has just walked past your house' - and he does look like him, even down the coat and small bag so to this day, he is known to us as Roy Cropper

The last gardener I had had a shock of blond kind of frizzy hair and was instantly nicknamed (by my son) as Sideshow Bob (Simpsons) - when I'd asked around about this gardener, nobody knew him, the minute I said he looked a bit like Sideshow Bob, they all knew who I meant!

Chap who owns a local off-licence is nicknamed Slithering Sam because of how he sidles up to you and tries, in a wheedling, slightly lispy voice, to sell you stuff.

We do that on holiday. On a recent trip to France we found a lovely little cafe where we ate every day. The owner, of course we called Rene ('Allo Allo). There was another regular,we called President Kennedy, the very efficient waiter was Speedy Gonzales and a grumpy couple who always sat in a corner were the Old Farts. It just makes chatting about them all easier as we had no idea of their names.

Wonder what they called us?

Really enjoying reading this very funny thread!

Mr. Fussy - when planting his annuals he measured the distance between them with a ruler and dusted the leaves with a paint brush. We came a bit unstuck when the children actually called him Mr.F as they thought it was his name. The 'Duchess' - 93 years old and double of the Duchess of Kent. Mr & Mrs Fang - both dentists. Arthur & or Martha. Cotton Wool Man - big hair, round and full of air. Dear Boy. Him Upstairs. Mrs Tee Hee, because she does all the time. Postman Pat (his name really is Patrick). Mr.Smelly, because he does. Jolly Molly to differentiate from the other Molly, who isn't.

I would love to know what they call me - or perhaps not!

This thread is so funny! We have for neighbours, Fat Ugly, the Dumpies, Dick, Idiot Heads, and Thomas Crapper who is a cat from across the road who we think ids great but when DH has mowed the front lawn Thomas comes along and does one in the centre of it. We don't even know if he's called Thomas only that he's a Tom cat, crapper is self explanatory.

We have a Vi I used to think it was her real name until my neighbour put me right and told me it was short for 'village idiot'

A man walking dog who often stops and talks about trains, name is Bill We call him Puffing Billy.

My lovely DD2 calls herself, at times, 'Oops I Forgot' as she overheard me once telling my friend that I had forgotten to take my pill and she was conceived/

A man who used to belong to a singles club by friend also went to was called Merv the Swerve because he swerved from woman to woman

we have acid paul, vw paul and brummie paul as friends ...

Returning from the shops the other day DH asked if I had met anyone, yes I replied, The stout woman, Osama Bin Laden, mrs Blobby and Capt Birdseye.
Any crack, he said. No just had a bit of a blether with them all.
I wonder what they call me.
I hasten to add they are all really nice folk.

Two of our neighbours are always known as George's Mum and Dad, in spite of the fact that we know their names and the fact that George the cat has been dead for several years.

One of my customers at M&S was always known as Small Cappuccino No Chocolate.

Another neighbour is known to us as B*m Face. She is actually a lot nastier than the name suggests, we're being quite nice about her.

Two of my sisters are The Prickly Pear.

We have two Iains as neighbours, one either side. They are 'NiceIain' and 'OrribleIain'. Last week I asked my son to take a parcel round to next door. He called across the garden 'NiceIaian or 'OrribleIain?'.

Fortunately only 'NiceIain' was in - we both heard the chuckle. I so hope that one doesn't get spread round the village!

Merv the Perv lives across the lane, and his wife is Rutting Rosie. Because we knew her when she was younger and wilder.

Barrow Boy lives further up the lane. He used to be one in London, but in the garden still calls out to his wife as if he is about to force her to buy a sack of spuds.

My friend's ex husband moved into our village, we refer to him as 'silly boll**ks', the lady opposite is called 'the French lady' for obvious reasons, and we used to live opposite'Thelma and Bob' (from the likely lads) she looked just like Thelma and always seemed to be nagging and making a terrible fuss about things like encroaching hedges. We also call a rather large chap in a wheelchair 'Ironside' from the old Perry Mason dramas from my childhood. All of these names are in the privacy of our own home.....apart from the first one perhaps

'That Thieving B*****d' lived next door and Slugsie is across the road. The first is so called because he is a TB and the second because of his shape and way of walking - chin on chest, beer belly stuck out and shuffle, shuffle, shuffle. Rude maybe but only called that in these four walls !

The pub DH and I frequented before we married had 'L' the hat (always wore a trilby) 'B' the cab 'M' the shoe 'B' the book all referring to their trade.

The pub DH and I frequented before we married had 'L' the hat (always wore a trilby) 'B' the cab 'M' the shoe 'B' the book all referring to their trade.

Oh yes indeed. In our street we have Neanderthal, Homer Simpson, chocolate teapot, Derby and Joan and fat Bob

Er....no.
Lack of imagination perhaps?

We do this too. We regularly come up behind Mr. Slow in his car. He drives at 40mph and never varies. I make names from number plates too, it drives my OH mad as he can't see them being rather dyslexic.

Not really funny as such, but I used to work as a canteen assistant in a factory, and until I`d been there a while I didn`t know many names of the people on the machines where I took the tea trolley round. Consequently, I`d think of them in terms of what they drank, be it tea, coffee, orange juice, with or without milk or sugar.

We do this too! Mostly in our local pub. There are Phil and Sharon (as they resemble Phil and Sharon from Eastenders), the odd couple because they just don't look like a match at all, Mr Creep (sounds unkind but when he talks to women he looks at their chests with a lecherous look on his face), the lad and his dad although the dad is in his 90s and the lad is about 60.

It's something we do all the time , we currently have a fit family who jog,cycle or run everywhere , the dog man walks his little dog same time every day. a white van man , self explanatory really, a pub lady....don't ask and Harold and Hilda from the TV as they always seem to be wearing the same style of clothes in the same colour.

We used to have George and Mildred living next door, although she wasn't called Mildred.

'Toothy' lives over the road, so-called because he has a mouthful of gnashers in various shades of brown, and somewhere in the distance lives a woman we call 'the Mad American' because she shouts at her poor dog so loudly in that unmistakeable accent you can hear her for miles on a still evening...