apricot I'm employing a two-pronged approach! I'm already in direct contact with the MD of the manufacturing company - a Guaranteed Delivery letter seemed to do the trick. Another one will be winging its way tomorrow! Now, I've also emailed the CEO of the retailer. I'm afraid my missives are seriously lacking in humour 
Possibly the amount of humour is in a ratio proportionate to the amount of £££ spent 
Hello! Did I "hear" my name?
Sorry, I cannot claim responsibility for that, but very much wish I could!
wondering if Tracey is really phoenix in a previous job, or even in disguise as Tom
Wonderful
I love the idea that 'Tracey' would consider changing her job to that iof cherry dropper because it 'sounds like fun' !!
Very amusing - loved the idea of the cherries being dropped from a height
That was funny, Mini. I wonder if there are any more exchanges like that online? 
I was looking online for the best way of complaining about our brand new cooker with a whistling grill - not a melodic, happy, let's-all-join-in type of whistle. No it's a low volume, high-pitched, ear-piercing whistle which renders the grill unusable other than in ten second bursts.
Where was I? Oh yes, while looking online, I came across this, which I found amusing enough to make me calm down and decide to rephrase parts of my almost-libellous complaints letter (I'm waiting for the third engineer's visit 
)
Here's the link: forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=4681859
Apologies to those who don't like links, but it's far too long to post the whole thing
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