Decluttering - but how do I say goodbye to books?

I have a 6 foot high x 2.6" foot wide bookcase in my little sitting room - and now all my books have to fit in there. Any over, and I make myself prune them down and give some to charity. I must admit though I usually have a few stacked in front as well.

My husband has a smaller bookcase where he keeps his (mainly technical boring books)

I have loads of non fiction - good gardening books etc, and some I had as a present as a child from loved ones, that I can't bear to lose, some of my Dads favourites too. There are a number of hardback fiction I had in recent years as gifts, I feel a bit mean getting rid of them, but probably won't read themm again.

Now I have my beloved Kindle I don't have half as many" read it once and chuck paperbacks" cuttering the bookcase.

Ha ha Durhamjen ! Good point. My answer is books, but I try to keep them on shelves as much as possible. I was brought up in a tidy house where everything had its place, so have had to adapt a lot over the last 43 years. Every flat surface in this house gets covered in DH possessions. But he is worth it

I am all for decluttering and I do give away or swap some of my books but I couldn't live in a house without bookshelves and my children are the same in their own houses. When I am rich and famous I am going to buy a house with a library!!!!

What do you add to the clutter, Judthepud?

I have a DH like that Nelliemoser and it worries me how much clutter we have in the house. And we only moved in 7 years ago. He just can't part with anything, and now has an online shopping addiction! Every day more stuff arrives by post. Clearing it out will be a nightmare!

What a great idea notnecessarilywiser I think I might follow book crossing.com up! Thank you for that.

I have lots of books and I have a very emotional attachment to them, beyond the stories that they hold. But I know one day I will have to clear many of them out. I only have to look at the covers of some of my books to know exactly where I was, what holiday I was on, etc when I was reading them so these I will keep. But many of my books hold no memories or I never finished reading them and these will go.

Does anyone else use "Librarything" to keep a record of their books? If you've got time while de cluttering you could list your books on this site and then you'll always have a record of the books you had. You can even set a view of all the front covers, to bring back those memories. I currently add each book as I read it (you can even record the reading dates) so that if ever I have to get rid of all my books I know that I will always have a record of them.

These days I love reading on my Kindle - so much lighter and easier to turn pages than books! So if there are any books that I really want to read again I can do so easily, and as many are classics they are cheap to upload.

I have a regular book cull of my books and never buy books unless my library cannot get them. Using the library is very important to me and I will order online and wait for the book to be available. Support your local library or lose it!

I would go through them and keep the ones that you feel emotionally attached to or any that you feel you might read again and then get rid of the rest. I don't think you can just ditch old friends! I am more discerning from since we moved and just keep the ones that I really like- otherwise they go straight out. I still feel a bit sad- I don't think that you can have too many books! I can't understand anyone saying 'they are just bits of paper' - they are far more than that!

Books? I was told that every time you buy a new one you should give two away. I do try, so how come I still have seven bookcases full.
Every time we moved, the removal men would say not more books. In fact we always packed up books first because we knew it would take the longest.
However, I do know two couples who have more books than me.

It's not just that, Nelliemoser. My husband was a bit of a hoarder, particularly with tools, screws, nails, etc.
Eighteen months after we moved here, he died. My sons come and ask me if their dad had whatever, and usually they can find it in the garage or shed, so slowly the hoard is getting whittled away but I dare not throw anything out, because that is what they will need the week after. I no longer have a drill because they have both gone to my sons now, but I would probably ask one of my sons to do any drilling. Not because I do not know how to, but because my sons would get upset if I did it without asking them.

BookCrossing members also stock free bookshelves in cafes which have space and agree to have them.

Oxfam's dedicated book shops are good. They look at what the book is rather than its condition and have a wide range of books. Some charity shops are turning into ladies' wear shops now and sell very few books. Some are only interested in very clean recent books. Even slightly yellowed books are often not put out on sale, they like books to appear unread.

If like Silverleaf you would like to know where your books go next have a look at BookCrossing.com. Books are registered, and labelled then released. It's great to hear a book you left somewhere, or gave away, years ago has been found far away. A copy of Skipping Christmas I'd released a long while ago suddenly popped up in the middle of Australia!

There must be something wrong with me. There are very few books I really want to keep. I don't often re-read novels. I have a few reference books that are worth keeping, but I do really worry about the stress of clearing out the house when it comes to downsizing.

Having an OH who hoards and remembering the stress of moving house last time when we were no where near ready to clear out while the new people were moving in still gives me nightmares.

It will be the effort of trying to get OH to part with all the stuff in the house that never gets used and is cluttering up most of the cupboards in the house that worries me.
I am probably getting far too wound up about this. It's worries about what will happen if I can no longer physically manage all this myself and getting rid of some stuff that will keep a reasonable value.

I can see me and him arriving at a two bedroom bungalow with a four bedroom house full of the unused stuff that he cannot part with.

We have a large house, with books in every room, but I have found it very difficult to part with old favourites. I have developed several ways of reframing my relationship with a lot of my books by by (a) imagining someone looking for an out-of-print volume they can't find and rejoicing when they find the very thing they wanted amongst the ones I have taken to the Peace and Justice book sale in our town, (b) noticing how long the painful feelings last when I find that I've given a what I thought I'd never look at again - a much shorter time than the unease I feel if yet again I haven't succeeded in decluttering as I'd intended, and (c) noticing how new books cease to contain that magic something I was hoping for when I bought them, once they've been on the shelf for a few months, or even simply weeks. They somehow grow dull and flat and become imbued with a heart-sinking sense of duty, like a set book. I just find it works better to have several approaches depending on the sort of relationship I have with the books, and with what they represent from my past - I do tend to seine the moment when I'm feeling enthusiastic about having a good clear-out, and not to try it if I'm feeling depressed.

I actually think we owe it to our kids not to leave them with too much clutter. I'm certain that all the hard work involved when Mum went into assisted care was largely responsible for DH's stroke. I was still teaching and although he had just retired, he was recovering from a hip replacement. He insisted on doing the lion's share of the work.

Her bungalow was stuffed full of clutter. She admitted as much herself. It was a stressful time for us both and we will not put our own kids through it.

DH's parents, on the other hand, de-cluttered when they moved nearer to his sister. Sadly they both died shortly afterwards and when we cleared out their flat I remember DBIL remarking 'There's not much to show for forty odd years of marriage'

I know who got off lightly.

Nooooooooo

elena, want a set of shelf filling encyclopaedias?

We got rid of 100s and 100s of books last year when we moved. I have not missed any. I took boxes and boxes to oxfam who are very good at sorting books (my ds had a girlfriend who explained they did this very thoroughly and she was a specialist volunteer who researched prices and worked out where to send out of date information books, as there are collectors of this type of thing). Anyway, oxfam took them, and I opted for the gift aid thing. A few months ago I got a nice card saying so far my books had sold for a few hundred pounds and this meant they could reclaim £x in tax. That was a really nice incentive to get rid of some more!

Only problem is our shelves look a bit bare now ??

I have a kindle but as many of have said I am emotionally attached to my books. The kindle is great for holidays so the guy at the airport doesn't look in amazement at my book collection using up nearly all my allowance! I also read several books on my kindle hanging around doing jury service recently . But if I end up like my mum 92 slightly forgetful and fairly immobile I can read all my books again without remembering anything about them. Keep the books you really love and yes I too have this awful dread that all things electronic will suddenly stop working . Us Book worms will be laughing
then !
Having said all that , I will have the dubious task of finding homes for all my late father's books ( probably thousands) when my mum dies ! ??

feetlebaum So what is the benefit of having an empty loft?

We cleared ours completely when we had more insulation put up there, and it gave us a great feeling of freedom!
However, it is now fuller than ever

@Doreen5 - So what is the benefit of having an empty loft?

Someone once told me that paperbacks are meant to be read then passed on to someone else or to charity. I try to do that, except for favourites. I use my Kindle most of the time anyway these days.

However, we have lots of old books which belonged to DPs and DGPs, lots of children's books that were ours, our DC's and books about any hobbies we have started and not carried on with (although we could go back to them). I still regret throwing out some old books which were given to my DF when he was about 7 or 8 from his father's employer, with his name inscribed in them. I gave them to Oxfam about 35 years ago, but I still think about them.
We seem to have books in bookcases in several rooms, more in boxes and even more in the attic.
I could start a secondhand bookshop, but I really should cull them.

blue22 - isn't it a good feeling to send your "babies" out into the world and share them with other people?

Re the OP - I have moved so many times in my life (including moving countries) that I learnt very quickly to hate crates of damn BOOKS that weigh a ton (I must be the most unsentimental person!) So we have very few books - in fact in our current house the bookshelf determines how many books we can have. When it it full, we whittle it down again (and it is not a large bookshelf).

I don't need loads of books on display to show the world how well-read I am .

I have always been an avid reader, as far back as I can remember, even reading before I started school in 1945. O f course, as I got older my nose was always in a novel, but since my 5oth decade, I wearied of novels and now I read books on spiritual teachings, various religions, scientific /medical information. When I feel I have absorbed enough of a particular kind, I will pass it on to someone else. We have a Quaker Library in our village, which loans out all sorts of spiritual books, so I pass onto them; or at a local Peace Centre. I retain certain books for reference and have two large bookcases in my bedroom. I couldn't bear to use Kindle, I gain a certain satisfaction from turning a page, and some books I have had for years, because, as you change, so does the perception of what you read. I did start to write a book last year, to leave as a memory for my family, it included poetry too, I seem to be triggered in picking up a pen and off I go. Then in November of last year I fell and broke the Humerous in left arm, so I went off the boil, but come Christmas and possibly inclement weather, I am determined to see completion. Blessings to all, Margaret.