Do you think you're still 'attractive'?

We've just made a start on sorting through and cutting down our large accumulation of photographs and I was amazed that I was much better looking than I ever thought I was at the time. (I too had a disparaging mother.) Not fantastic, but certainly not ugly, I thought then that DH married me for my car maintenance abilities. Now, having gained a bit of weight and surplus flesh plus a slouching arthritic limp I'm definitely nothing to write home about!

But, on thinking about it, I'm really not too bothered. I continue to try to make the best of a bad job, but as long as I don't look in passing mirrors I can't see myself, so I can just be me. And most people seem to be happy to know me so I'm happy too.

I guess it depends what you mean by attractive. Attractiveness is complex; it isn't all about superficial prettiness*. I've always found what I shall call the look of intelligence/personality in a face more attractive than what we are pleased to call beauty. There is a tendency in some fashion publications for the models to look rather vacant. I find that offputting.

*physical beauty... whatever you want to call it.

mrsmopp - I had long hair that used to fall in ringlets (not cool in the 60s)

How great it would have been if hair straighteners had been invented then.

In my youth it was the thing to have long straight hair - think Cathy Mcgowan but I was blessed with thick unruly curls so not fashionable. Mother told me I looked like the wild woman from Borneo, or an explosion in a mattress factory, or that I looked as if I'd been dragged through a hedge backwards.
But now at last I get compliments on my curls and told I'm lucky. A decent haircut was all I needed...

the only way I would ever stop traffic is to become a lollipop lady

Oooh yes Katek me too. I'm always having a fright looking in a mirror and seeing Dad in a dress staring back at me. Scary!

I never was a looker as they say, but must have had something going for me as I married twice.

What does alarm me though is when I see my father walking towards me in shop mirrors!!

When I was young and pretty I used to stop traffic. Now the only time that
happens is when a driver stops to let the me the OAP cross the road safely.

No- but I do think I've acquired another kind of attractiveness which comes from the heart (I know some of you will that that hard to believe lol).

Some of my old friends who have remainded very attractive are sadly not very nice people. I have 2 old friends who have managed that miracle- become even better people and friends, and remained hugely attractive- my hat off to them.

Well to be honest when I look in the mirror I think wow, I look fantastic!
Then I put my specs on

That's kind of you Ana. Don't worry though, I am well aware that there's more to me than what I look like. I'm actually a pretty confident sort of person and gain self esteem from what I do rather than what I look like. Not praising or complimenting children was certainly the way things were when I was young. Unlike now when everyone is told they are "Like totally awesome"!

My four year old grand daughter was looking at some 35 year old family photos and said to me 'you don't look like yourself anymore'.

The new me still likes to look the best I can.

Even, sometimes.

Women are their own worst enemies sonetimes.

Jane10, your post makes me feel sad - surely your husband/partner must have found you attractive? And as has been said in previous posts, 'attractive' doesn't necessarily relate to looks.

It never even crossed my mind that I could possibly be attractive! Parents and Grandparents didn't encourage that sort of thing when I was young and DGSs certainly don't now! - "You're fat Gran". Who needs self esteem anyway!

Am I still attractive? An absolute stunner in my and my husband's eyes anyway!

I would be worried if my brother in law wolf whistled at me as that is not normal ... I expect he fancies you deep down.

Why don't you ask him to stop ... that is quite reasonable

My brother-in-law has a habit of wolf whistling at me when I walk into a pub or whatever for a meet up. It is SO embarrassing. People look around to see the gorgeous creature he is whistling at and they see.... erm.... me

Just what I've been thinking ....

Mmm..I think Drummerman could be on the pull..

Drummerman,put a photo of you smiling,

I can honestly say I have never considered myself attractive.

I'd read this thread.
Later was walking through the village and heard a 'wolf whistle'. No way was I going to look around as I knew it would be a friend having a laugh'. It really is quite hard trying not to have a look.

I wasn't too far wrong, it was my stepson

Everyone looks ancient to anyone over the age of twenty anyway ...