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Children playing out

(55 Posts)
Elrel Tue 19-Apr-16 17:59:44

My short road is a cul de sac, I am in an 'arm' set at a right angle. My house is one of ten small terraced house opposite another ten, no road, only two pavements and strip of grass between them. Due to a slope the far end has a set of wide shallow steps.
Sunny day, three small boys, under 6, happily out on scooters and a small bike, going up and down the pavements and the steps. As I'm thinking how nice to see them out of doors the neighbour from the house nearest the top of the steps appears and shouts at them to go away. Their mother was already in her small front garden keeping an eye on them. Their father appears and replies to the neighbour.
Later I tell the mother that the neighbour is known for telling off children who play on the steps and has done it for the last 30+ years.
I feel so sad that this bullying behaviour cut short happy, innocent, inoffensive playing out.

Cosafina Sun 24-Apr-16 11:07:58

One of the things I love best about East London, since I moved here nearly 3 years ago, is that the kids play out in our street. It's quiet enough, and with speed bumps, and the older ones look out for the smaller ones, but it's wonderful to see them running around having fun instead of slumped in front of the telly or hunched over a PlayStation.
Plus they all greet you with a smiling Hello as you walk past - this is how life in a community should be!
Why doesn't the OP's grumpy neighbour move to a retirement village where he won't be bothered by youth?

EEJit Sun 24-Apr-16 10:41:19

I'd be inclined to go out and join the kids, right outside the grumpy old gits house. But then I can be a bolshy old git when I want to be.

jinglbellsfrocks Sun 24-Apr-16 10:27:42

I still want to know why Grannylyn bumped this thread only eleven minutes after the previous post! grin

lizzypopbottle Sun 24-Apr-16 10:22:14

I live on an estate of bungalows. We brought our three children up here and they played on their bikes in the street but nowadays there are few children around and I suppose we've got used to it being quiet. It was quite a surprise then, a few weeks ago, to hear children playing in an adjacent back garden. Their voices are so loud! I was wishing for a volume control! ? They seem to be here to stay (although I never noticed the house had changed hands) so I guess we'll get used to hearing them. Their conversations can be quite amusing when the boy isn't teasing his sister to the point of noisy tears ?

Retrolady Sun 24-Apr-16 09:51:47

Apart from any traffic issues, I love to hear next-doors children playing outside. They are very good if I ask them to keep their bikes etc off my bit, though they do forget sometimes ... well, they're kids - I bet I was the same. I remember we had a neighbour when I was a child who was a right misery and used to puncture our ball if we accidentally let it stray on to her front grass, and went completely crazy if we walked along the top of her 9 inch high wall. We were only about 5 - for goodness sake!
That misery should treasure the sight and sound of children playing happily. They'll grow up and retreat indoors to their screens soon enough.

Barmyoldbat Sun 24-Apr-16 09:45:21

How sad not to let children out of the garden to play. They do need to acquire life skills and if they are Molly coddled this won't happen. I see no harm in a child being allowed to cycle or scoot up and down an area outside the home, as long as they are given some rules and parents keep an eye on them.

meandashy Sun 24-Apr-16 09:39:48

I wished I had a garden! My gd (5) lives with me and it drives me nuts having her stuck in doors! It isn't realistic to be at the park all day! Tell the old far to p☆☆s off!

harrysgran Sun 24-Apr-16 09:34:30

I think it's nice to see children playing together outside as long as they aren't destroying other people's property cars gardens etc I always played outside as did my three children but I feel people can be a lot less tolerant of children in general now.

Angela1961 Sun 24-Apr-16 09:27:15

My daughter allows her 5 year old out to play (she stays in the garden ) and he practices his bicycle skills on the pavement in their cul-de-sac. It is worrying these days that some people would moan at children playing,perhaps forgetting that their children were probably out doing the very same a few years ago.

rubylady Sat 23-Apr-16 14:50:25

Gosh, they'd have been alright with us lot growing up! I counted 42 friends I grew up with in my area and we all probably made a racket, put chalk marks on the floor, played skipping, football, hide and seek, made ice slides in winter, babies in prams in summer, all under the watchful eyes of mums sat in chairs in the back street, a wonderful upbringing. My children played out, my DS in the cul-de-sac we came from 18 months ago but still plenty of children around for him to join in with. Not so much here, we're on a main road now but then now he has mates round. I'm not sure there are more paedophiles around, maybe we are more aware of them than in our childhood times with the media but still children should be allowed to be out and parents keeping an eye on, just like they did in the '70's.

Willow500 Sat 23-Apr-16 12:38:26

When my youngest son was about 2 he would go up and down our concrete drive on his plastic car which admittedly did make a racket. Our neighbour came out one day and handed me some money and told me to go buy him a bike. Duly bought him a little trike with rubber wheels and peace ensued - for us and the neighbour smile

Eloethan Sat 23-Apr-16 09:50:28

If this man objects to throwing balls back, he is obviously just a grumpy git. I would hate to live near, or - worse still - next to, someone like that.

Elrel Sat 23-Apr-16 03:13:31

Ethel and Tricia:-
Our 'perfectly good gardens' are too small for bicycles or scooters. Children get to know each other by playing in the street.
The 'arm' our houses are in is at a right angle to the actual cul de sac road and has no road, parking or other access for vehicles. Delivery vans etc. have to park in the main cul de sac and carry the goods to our houses, a big nuisance for them when items are large or heavy such as building supplies. The children were not at any risk from traffic.
The grumpy man has been telling children not to play outside his (end terrace) house or on the steps, which are part of the pavement, for 30 or 40 years.
The area between our two rows of facing houses is suitable for skates, dolls prams, small bicycles and scooters.
I've since heard from the grumpy man's next door neighbour that her husband has netted over their garden as her boys like to play with balls and he won't return them if they go into his back garden. Her boys are 7 and 9, well behaved and polite.

TriciaF Thu 21-Apr-16 08:55:11

Yes, I think it's the increase in traffic and parked cars that would put me off letting children play out now. Even in a cul de sac like Elrel's, cars often do turns in the street to exit.
Rather than being a paedophile, maybe the old grumpy lady had had a near miss in her car. Gone are the days of roller skating in the front street.

Eloethan Wed 20-Apr-16 22:53:31

Most back gardens aren't suitable for children to play on their scooters. It's no wonder that children are less active when there are old miseries around like this. At one time children could play on the street safely and happily but many urban streets, such as ours, are lined with parked cars.

It used to be a bit of a sore point between my husband and myself when some of the young boys played ball outside. He was afraid of it hitting our car but, provided they're not too boisterous, I think children should take precedence. It's not safe for younger children to go unaccompanied to a park and some parents can't always spare the time if the park is a bit of a walk away.

etheltbags1 Wed 20-Apr-16 22:08:57

I think the problem is that it is too dangerous to let children play, its modern day society, in the OP, the grumpy old woman could have been a paedophile or harmed the children in some way. My DD and partner have vowed never to let my DGD out to play in the street for her own good. They will let other children into the garden where it is safe but not outside. I agree with this. I often wonder why children play in the street/grassy areas when most houses have perfectly good gardens, it makes sense to invite little friends into the garden and check afterwards that they get home safely as I did with my DD friends.
Its not like the olden days when streets were the only places to play.

Synonymous Wed 20-Apr-16 21:47:47

Granarchist I can still remember being told off when I was 9 years old and made to get a scrubbing brush and a bucket of water and scrub the pavement clear of hopscotch chalk marks. I can remember thinking that the lady who complained was very grumpy and obviously didn't know how to play hopscotch.grin
So nice to hear that the children are happily playing. smile

Newquay Wed 20-Apr-16 20:34:47

Bump? Grannylyn?

Granarchist Wed 20-Apr-16 15:35:37

In our lane the children chalk out a hopscotch area - a new child brought up in Japan, took one look and said would they be made to remove it as they would in Japan. I think it's great - I'm sure she will enjoy joining in.

Charleygirl Wed 20-Apr-16 14:57:43

I also live in a cul de sac of 16 houses and 2 flats. The children have a great time playing outdoors here and are all very well aware what to do when a car comes. I do not like them dropping litter or planting branches of trees on my front lawn but they are very good and do clear up when I ask them to do it. They also know that I do not like 6 of them riding their bikes over my lawn. It is open plan and they do not understand yet what private property means. It works both ways because they run to help if I am planting or pruning a bush. I would not like to live here without them. I get told all sorts of childish secrets.

grannylyn65 Wed 20-Apr-16 08:18:28

bump

glammanana Wed 20-Apr-16 08:06:07

What a misery your neighbour sounds I hope the Father was firm but direct in his response to the person concerned as long as they are playing nicely there is no harm done imo,its lovely to see children enjoying themselves and not stuck in front of TV's and game stations.

Anniebach Tue 19-Apr-16 22:52:47

The children should have that freedom, I hope they don't fear the miserable devil.

Elrel Tue 19-Apr-16 22:44:56

Thank you all, I might tell the mum about the supportive comments on here next time I see her. The incident made me feel so sad.

Newquay Tue 19-Apr-16 22:34:06

I hope that those children continue to play out there-grumpy neighbour has no right to tell children to go away presumably it's public access. I should just tell the children to keep away from that end of the path and watch them like a hawk as you say the mother was already doing.