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Why do I feel guilty?

(15 Posts)
sunseeker Fri 29-Jul-16 10:51:59

I have had a gardener for the last 5 years, ever since DH died. In the past he has been very good and we get on really well. However, lately he has let me down on a number of occasions. 3 weeks ago he told he he was going to cut my very large hedges, they still haven't been done and are getting totally out of hand. He came yesterday, cut the grass, cut half of one hedge and then left. So today I have another gardener coming to give me a quote to put everything right and if he does a good job I will use him in the future. So why do I feel guilty about the 1st gardener? He does a couple of gardens around here and those are immaculate - it is just mine he seems to have lost interest in.

Gagagran Fri 29-Jul-16 11:14:44

Could he be looking for a pay rise sunseeker? Has he had one in the last 5 years. Could be that! Just a thought.

Mumsy Fri 29-Jul-16 11:17:40

perhaps your first gardener is over worked and trying to fit people into his busy schedule and was going to come back at a later date to finish the garden off. Did you ring him to ask when he was coming back?

sunseeker Fri 29-Jul-16 11:19:36

I pay him the same as everyone else - it does go up every year. I haven't rung because his phone number on the receipts he gives me are so faint I can't read them.

Gononsuch Fri 29-Jul-16 11:23:41

Have you told us everything sunseeker, theirs a reason people change after 5 years. So why do you feel guilty about the first gardener.

sunseeker Fri 29-Jul-16 11:30:59

I feel guilty because he was so helpful after my husband died, he has worked hard on the garden in the past. As I said we get on well and the only thing that has changed is that the last couple of times he came I didn't make him a cup of tea! (I was going out). I give him a free hand in the garden to do whatever he thinks necessary (I'm not a gardener) and I pay his bill promptly.

ninathenana Fri 29-Jul-16 11:40:19

H does gardening jobs I just asked his opinion. Does he have set hours. Could he simply have run out of time ? H says was he using a battery or mains hedge cutter as if it's a long hedge maybe he ran out of battery. Rude of him not to explain though

ninathenana Fri 29-Jul-16 11:42:30

maybe his cutter run out

sunseeker Fri 29-Jul-16 11:50:59

Over the last 6 months he hasn't stuck to specific times or days, just turned up. Yesterday was the first time in 3 weeks. I think Mumsy is right, he is cutting back on how much he does (he is 60) and he has said his wife would like him to spend less time working, but I do wish he had said something.

Nonnie Fri 29-Jul-16 11:54:05

Should he be cutting hedges just yet? Isn't it too early because of birds nests? We always get ours done in the autumn

obieone Fri 29-Jul-16 12:04:19

Sometimes people do not like to say that they can no longer cope with everything the same as they used to.
This situation seems a bit like the classic, man does not like going to the doctor syndrome.

I dont think you need to feel guilty.
I do however think the situation needs a bit of gentle handling[assuming I am right].

If you get another gardener, still be grateful and gentle and understanding to the one that has treated you nicely up to now.
It is possible that actually, he may be quite glad that you have got someone else to do the work.

In an ideal world, your gardener would have said somthing.

NotTooOld Fri 29-Jul-16 12:15:50

Perhaps he's ill?

Christinefrance Fri 29-Jul-16 12:18:49

If he is not doing the job you pay him for then explain and get someone else. You are employing him, he is not doing you a favour.

janeainsworth Fri 29-Jul-16 12:32:11

I think the only thing you should feel guilty about is not discussing it with him.
If someone is underperforming, you should give them a chance to explain before just getting rid of them.
If he was your employee as opposed to a contractor, you would have to do that, or find yourself on the wrong side of an employment tribunal.
But it's only common courtesy, really.

stillaliveandkicking Fri 29-Jul-16 21:52:47

I'd find someone else too. After all you don't really owe him anything, if he's not doing the job properly then it stands to reason.

I think by the sounds of it he doesn't want to do your garden for some reason and he would probably be relieved.

Carry on with new guy and if he approaches you just explain you thought he might now be too busy etc. so you've employed someone else.