Holiday anxiety

I suffered real anxiety before my holiday this year as it was my first one since my husband passed. My boys kept reassuring me I'd be fine but it didn't help. I've always worried about going on holiday like yourself but always had my husband to be a support. We went to Greece had a lovely time and now I feel a stronger person. Holidays are out of usual routine and can cause anxiety but once there the benefits of enjoying yourself in the sunshine will outweigh the negatives. Have a great time

I deal with this tendency to worry by being very(over!) organised .I have a checklist of things to do before I go,people to tell,things to pack (categorised depending on type of destination )I find it helps .I pack and get essential documents together a few days before .I quite like being picked up by taxi (our nearest airport is ten min drive)especially if it's an early morning flight as I feel even if we oversleep -we never have-the taxi driver will wake us (we avoid flying from other airports if at all possible ).I did hear of someone who got her dates wrong .The taxi driver turned up the morning before she thought she was going away ....he was right. And at least she got away .
I also clean the house thoroughly before we go .And try and have paperwork etc up to date
I'm not good at spontaneity and if travelling independently like to have accommmodation booked well in advance too
It's not an age thing with me as I've always been like this. Family joke is we could get the train (planes if theyd let you) before the one we intended as I insist on being in good time for everything. I have ti have unpacked, showered and have a drink in my hand the other end before I can relax.But after that I'm quite good at it
I love travelling and have done a lot of it but the pre trip anxiety remains .

Abroad is not Heaven, they have disasters, diseases and bad weather so when you book a holiday don't expect perfection.

For me a problem is that you have to book and pay so far in advance to get a reasonable price that you have no way of avoiding disasters and illness. I can never find these cheap last minute offers.

My husband says pay a bit more and travel in a bit of comfort,

Going on holiday is rated as one of the most stressful things so maybe better to put a few things in a suitcase and go without too much planning, I do see some British ladies overdress on continental holidays, you don't need a dozen matching outfits.

Chelseababy you can't please everyone.

Know just how you all feel I usually have a medical emergency the day before once blood pressure sky high and last year in eye casually just because I had an I growing eyelash. Sure all this is just caused by my anxiety levels. Will think about asking for something when I go to New York in a couple of weeks time thanks for the suggestion.

I suffered from pre holiday anxiety for years to the point where i only went because I knew I'd be ok once there. I'd describe myself as a born worrier who can easily 'catastrophise' the slightest event. A few years ago I had some counselling relating to my relationship with my very elderly mother and it was the best thing I've ever done. It was quite transformative and has helped me enormously with my tendency to worry. I have learnt to manage it and one of the bonuses is that I now look forward to holidays.
Lots of excellent practical suggestions on this thread which may well be all you need, but for other 'Olympic worriers' - do consider seeking help if it's starting to affect what you do/ don't do.

Hi
Feeling anxious and worried is a terrible thing to suffer from.
I wondered if you had ever tried Hypnotherapy?
Hypnotherapy and CBT don't just deal with the symptoms of anxiety it also goes into the root cause of your anxiety, meaning that you can start functioning again without feeling anxious.
Stuart Thompson is a hypnotherapist from Colchester, (but also does Skype online consultations) and has over 15 years experience as a therapist and specialises in anxiety.
He offers a free consultation here is his website page about anxiety:
www.stuarthypnotist.com/anxiety-treatment/4590698106

I totally agree with nanandgrampy... Break it down and put it away in boxes. Have a lovely holiday.

I'm similar to you Bernice 123. Look forward to a holiday, then when it arrives think "why on earth do I want to leave home, I'm comfortable here?" But once in car and on the road, or in a plane one relaxes.

We once had to run (in days when I still could run!) for the plane while our names were announced as DH had mis-remembered flight time. These days I book everything and keep the paperwork safe - make sure we get on the road or at the airport ages before necessary, with plenty of food and drink available and a book to read because I don't like service station/airport food. DH goes to hunt a good fry-up, I have my provisions and a book!

I'm glad to read this thread and see how many other people worry about holidays and travelling. I have worried for years and nowadays worry about what mess I'll return to as I have 2 sons living at home.
This year I fell on the train whilst looking for a working toilet, leaving my granddaughters alone 3 carriages away. In future a fall and what if I'm ill while responsible for the grandchildren will be added to my anxieties.

I'll join in too, I worry about everything. Possibly because many many many times I have a medical emergency just prior to travelling but I still make myself book and go. Of course, once there I am mainly OK and have a great time.

My husband is very grumpy about holidays and I have to take the initiative else we would not book anything and leave home but, of course, once there he'll turn to me after a few days and mutter 'isn't this lovely, I am so glad we came'. Grrrrr.

Incidentally, he is always cross with me as I, too, like to leave the house clean and tidy. He says I must be the only person who does so it was a joy to read that many others do this too.

Can't tell you how relieved I feel to know I'm not the only one who gets in such a state about holidays. My anxiety factor is really high at the moment as we are going away for a week (in this country) and for the first time our neighbour can't look after the cat so we have a pet-sitting lady coming in to feed her twice a day. I have this terror that the lady concerned will have an accident and our cat will starve to death, or we will have an accident on the way home and no-one will know that the cat is in need. Wholly ridiculous I know but I can't stop myself worrying. I also know logically that we will have a lovely time and that the cat will be fine! But logic doesn't come into it.

I hate the preamble to holidays, including packing, but am usually ok once we get there!

I am usually quite an anxious, worrying type of person. However in July my daughter asked me if I wanted to go away on a last minute holiday (less than a week in advance) I just went on line, sorted out my travel insurance (with existing medical conditions), placed all the items I wanted to take in the spare room ready to pack then when the time came, just packed my bag and went. Best holiday ever, no time to worry about anything, just had to get there. So maybe last minute works better for some people. Mind I would never worry about trivialities like window cleaning, paper work etc. Have no pets though, that must be a bit of a hassle to arrange.

My daughter has birthday anxiety.
Her 21st birthday was spent in hospital whilst a family member was poorly in intensive care. Hasn't had a good one since. Food poisoning this year. Contracted from a service station chicken dinner. Her G.P. has instigated the appropriate investigation.

I like to take last-minute holidays too, as there is - to my silly mind, anyway - less chance of anything going wrong in the lead up to departure. However......... as a grandma, we have regular childminding dates so last-minute trips are very difficult to arrange. This is the only downside of grandparenting (besides the tiredness!) and worth every missed opportunity! I wouldn't swap missed last minute-trips for not having grandchildren.

Thanks to all posters..i thought i was on my own with this one so it's good to know it's a common thing. I think as we age what once would be the enjoyable flutterings of excitement -that giddy 'can't wait' feeling -somehow morphs into anxiety.

Morethan, I am really interested to know if this anxiety is just a holiday thing or do you get anxious about other things in life too? If so then like me, you are just a natural worrier and there's not much you can do but accept it. I worry about loads of things, in fact (according to my husband)I get worried if I've got nothing to worry about!
My daughter and my husband are just the opposite which makes it even worse. But ultimately, I find no matter how much we worry, it makes little difference to what happens. So take your happy pill, (or not). Enjoy your holiday, and think 'Que Sera', 'What will be, will be'.

I love booking and planning for holidays, in some ways that is the best part of it, the anticipation. Then the anxiety kicks in as soon as I set off. I worry myself sick about.....getting sick. I have had some awful health problems on holidays, the usual stomach ones but also an attack of diverticulitis as soon as we arrived in South Africa, a chest infection in Cuba, flu in South America, cystitis in Alaska. So now I travel with a mini pharmacy in my suitcase but am so anxious the whole time that I probably make myself ill. I should probably stay at home but I make myself get out there and see the world and make sure I get good insurance!

I am such a worrier about holidays. I worry about our 19 year old cat. My next door neighbour feeds her, but I worry the cat will get sick and my neighbour would have to cope with it. I worry about the washing, ironing and packing. I worry about oversleeping and missing our early morning flight. In fact I lie awake all night so I don't sleep in! As a child, my mum was just the same. I remember we would all be sitting in our coats for hours waiting until it was time to go. Every scrap of food had to be eaten too. Mum would boil the leftover eggs and we'd have to take them with us. Fortunately the minute I sit down on the plane I give a huge sigh of relief and the worry has gone away.

I'm a little bit of a worrier but it's always been manageable. This holiday anxiety is really quite new, it's was certainly triggered by missing the flight and the following
mishaps. I too love the planning and once I'm on the plane I'm fine it's the weeks or so before. This year has been the worst. Perhaps it is an 'as we get older' syndrome. I do talk myself round but this week has been particularly bad. I did tell some of my work colleagues and they were surprised so I must be a really good actress/ hiding it.

I attribute my holiday anxiety, (yes, I'm another sufferer) to the fact that we never strayed far from home when I was a child. I remember a holiday in Westcliff-on -Sea, about 20 miles from our home, and a week in Devon ( I went with an aunt and uncle)when I was 13.
Also attribute it to the fact that DH likes to cut time margins as finely as possible, and I constantly worry that we will miss flights.
Don't worry about the milkman,though, as we don't have one. Am intrigued by this worry. Do you think he will be lonely?

Well, I am sitting here totally astonished as I, too, thought I was the only one with holiday anxiety! In my case, I do have IBS so that is an added worry but it isn't just that. We have had five holidays (in the UK) this year with children and their spouses and our young grandchildren so what's not to like? I do my best but find myself longing to get home and when I do finally open the front door, I feel ecstatic! I won't let myself give in to these feelings, though, I love our family too much to miss out on having fun with them. Human beings are funny, aren't they?!

Morethan2 you are lucky - because you love holidays. I think it is very reasonable to be anxious before a holiday and you have had a few bad experiences so it is bound to affect you but if you are fine once you are there then I think anxiety is fine in your case.
I, on the other hand get anxiety before a holiday because Ijust hate going away, (except to one destination where all my family go so it's just like a big party). Last year other half was determined to go to France. I didn't want to go anywhere. I have suffered with anxiety for years, so anything I can do to make things easier is fine with me, so I told him I didn't want to go. He said fine, he would go by himself (driving across to Calais and then booking something when he got there, so no advance reservations to worry about. I was glad I wasn't going, but felt guilty he was going alone, so I agreed. But I didn't enjoy it. I found it made me even more anxious as usual, and I counted the hours til I got hime. Just be glad you are not like me, I know I am not the average holiday worrier. Just enjoy yourself when you are there and tell yourself that you did worry but you got there in once piece, had a great time and felt better for it. I honestly wish I could be like you.

I also worry myself sick before travelling, ever since DH had his 1st heart attack in the airport before our holiday. Problem is, he now worries so much that I have to be upbeat and cheerful to keep him calm, even though I also hate flying!
We've been abroad lots since the heart attack and once we arrive at our destination we're both grand. The home journey never seems as bad for some reason!

So glad there are others like me. I hate going away untill I actually get there and then I am fine. Have gone off going abroad after an awlful tummy bug a year ago so we are staying in England. But going away means the house has to be cleaned from top to bottom (carpets being cleaned next week), all paperwork up to date, garden tidy etc. Why for heavens sake, it will all still be here when we come back. I suppose in a way home is my security blanket and it is hard to,leave it behind.