Not Much of a Role Model

Just wondering how we managed back in the 80s, when my 2 were little, and parent and child spaces hadn't been thought of. Or if they had they hadn't filtered through to my neck of the woods. I had a double buggy too, for a while, and the automatically opening shop doors were few and far between. Happy days! ?

What a horrible experience! There is such a lot of anger around. Am tempted to blame Trump & Hillary, but it sounds like that woman is deranged. Pity Thatcher closed down all the asylums......

Rant time? With a disabled GD, it really infuriates me that perfectly able people park in the disabled bays. They don't even have their late granny's blue badge.
Bad manners is inexcusable. The best thing to do it to ignore - but Jug you are right, the woman's poor boy has no hope of behaving any better when he grows up. he thinks it is normal behaviors.
I learned the hard way - my alcoholic father was candid to the point of cruelty; I thought it was normal and only later in life that I realised that it was downright rude. It is hard to change in later life [i was in my 30s...]

Bad manners ARE -

I parked in parent child space in Waitrose when I had no children in car just the seats
As I got out I felt really guilty and decided to move .i even said lightheartedly to young mum in next bay I was wrong and felt bad and re parked elsewhere (although she had not even noticed I had no kids with me )
When I went to desk for free coffee she was there complaining about this horrible woman who had taken parent space and how disgraceful it was - I coughed politely and said yes that's me and I moved and you know i did - get over it - !
Some people ....just love an argy bargy

If you are a blue badge holder you are allowed to park in parent/ child parking.

What a coincidence that this has just appeared on GN. as a similar thing happened to us yesterday in our local Morrison's. My husband had just got out of the car (which we had parked in the 'mother and toddler space) and I was just opening the door to let DGD out.We were then confronted by a screaming virago, berating us for misusing the space. I calmly pointed to my DGD and the woman completely deflated and scuttled off across the car park. What is it about these spaces that cause people to feel such a sense of entitlement?

The woman as you say was unhinged put it behind you as she made a fool of herself unlike you well done for rising above it maybe you and DH should of laughed at her I usually find this entertaining as people find it confusing

I think we should all have a great deal of sympathy for the poor parents of invisible children. I frequently see the large four wheel vehicles mentioned here parked outside our local Waitrose in the parent and child spaces, and see people getting out presumably with invisible children. I sometimes want to say it must be hard enough for their child(ren) to be invisible, without their being careless enough parents to not have a car seat for them, but as I don't fancy a rant or a black eye I keep my counsel and walk on by! Very annoying though - we have driven there with GD (5) and GS(2) and not been able to take advantage of a wider space and struggled to get the little ones out.

I love being fat, people insult me far more for my weight than my poor parking...I have hobbled off by the time they get to mentioning that.

I do have a blue badge and need it because I have CFS ? fibro arthritis and spondilitis...........I drag myself around the supermarket just to have some mobility in my day before my energy is depleted..........

I do wish disabled spaces were the ones closest to the store.......I certainly can't push a trolley far when it has a load of stuff in and need extra space to get in and out of car....I agree that parent need that too but hopefully they have more energy than me.

As for the trolly that needs taking all the way back to the store, to retrieve the pound coin, I just have to leave them and forgo my money..........grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

She is an out and out bully, and I salute you for your restraint and not giving in to her. The poor child - as you say-having to witness this sort of behaviour. I hope he learns from yours and not the woman he was with. Sometimes children and young people living in difficult circumstances do learn from their experience what not to do rather than to follow bad examples.

I feel very sorry for the poor child with her. At that age they do feel embarrassment too.

You did the right thing, by not rising up to the abuse, however, perhaps she was just having a bad day. No excuse for being rude, but no one really knows what's going on in other people's lives.

A friend drove with his wife and two young children to the supermarket, it was absolutely pouring with rain, and he was dismayed to see no available Parent & Child spaces left He dropped his wife and the children off to start their shopping, whilst he parked, way over the other side of the car park.
When walking back to the supermarket, he saw a couple get in their car in the P&C space - no children with them at all - as they were about to leave my friend tapped on the window, and asked them if they wanted him to call the Police. Bemused they asked why, and he said....because someone has obviously stolen your kids!!!! There was an altercation with no apologies or excuses from the couple.
Sadly people park in Disabled and P&C parking bays without the slightest pang of guilt....

Why is everything one needs always on the top shelf - I'm 5' and can't reach, so always looking for the tallest guy I can see - fortunately, to date they have always been brilliant!

I often tease my DD if I go shopping with her that we should use "Parent & Child", she is horrified & would not dream of doing so if DGS isn't with us.

I struggle getting out of my car in normal spaces but do not qualify for a "Blue Badge" so have to park in normal spaces, walking without a trolley is also difficult but I do have a stick & try to park near Trolley Park.

I'm quite tall so reaching up isn't too much of a problem, but low shelves especially if items are well back

I'm afraid people seem in general to be more and more selfish, thoughtless and inconsiderate - I'm quite often astounded by people's behaviour on the roads and when parking. And don't get me started on the huge vehicles that many seem to drive these days, a lot of them are the size of a minibus - no wonder we have less and less space on the roads!

My offspring all grown up and have left home now.

Many years ago, before the advent of reserved spaces for anyone, i had parked in the one available space near a wooded area. As I got back to the car with the 4 children, I noticed that the warden was just about to write a ticket for me. My return had been exactly on time which meant I would have been a couple of minutes late in getting them into the car.

Great time for a game for the 4 year old. He ran off into the woods. I was holding the baby in my arms as I fumbled for the key. Big girl (6) was despatched to find her brother. Younger sister (3) was noticed to be quietly vomiting into a bush.
The warden... a real jobsworth, started to write out his ticket even though the whole family had been back at the car on time.

I drove to the council offices to make a complaint to the head of department ( who had always deemed it fit to send me a personal Christmas card addressed to her 'friend') Don't think I'll let you off just because you know me she laughed.
I had to pay up and for several months afterwards found it preferable to drive to a less forbidding town to do my shopping.

Similar issues with disabled parking bays I'm afraid. But one thing I've noticed is how random it seems the siting of specific parking spaces and wondered if others had noticed too. The powers to be seem to have picked random blocks and designated them disabled or parent spaces yet often they bear no relation to actual needs! Today for example I went to Toys RUs for a gift for DGS birthday tomorrow and disabled parking was at the end of the building, further away from entrance but even further from the exit, yet walking is deemed too painful over 20m! Frankly a joke when "normal spaces" are right in front of the doors! ??

I have to admit to parking in a parent and child place when I'm with my 91 year old mum. She's very independent and insist on walking (with a stick) but it's very slow going. We need the extra space around the car so she can get in and out tho'.

I don't park in the specially designated spaces. However I find that the ordinary spaces have got smaller and what with columns and bollards proliforerating everywhere I can not park my 2 door car in a normal space and get people out of either side. I have to drop passengers off before parking and then back in with my car tight to to the line on the passanger side to be able to get out of my car. This has attracted abuse from people who want to cross the line with their door and want me to park plumb in the middle of a space. The store manager tells me that I should (I don't) park my car in the disabled or parent and toddler spaces as they are just extra wide spaces sited wherever the supermarket fancies and have no legal standing so they don't care or enforce them. He tells me they just called them wide spaces for a while for 4c4s, 2 door cars and people needing more space, but had to change the names as the parent and toddler group weren't sure where to park.... Although he tells me there is no such thing as parent and toddler spaces really, one store started it as a customer gimmick and the others have had to follow as its expected, but they are all just customer spaces, some wide and some standard in his book.

Lozzamas
The supermarket manager to whom you spoke is exactly that, a supemarket manager.
He should stop offering 'free' legal advice, as he is completely wrong about 'disabled' and 'parent and child' parking spaces.
If a supermarket owns the car park, and they have designated spaces for use by a particular group, with a sign warning of penalties for wrongful use, they can, and indeed should, prosecute anyone using them without need.
You should, incidentally, park in the centre of your chosen parking space, as if you inadvertently put the tiniest portion of your car, even wing mirrors, over the dividing line, you can be prosecuted by whoever manages the car park as you would be deemed to have taken up two spaces!
People who 'want to cross the line with their door' are actually in the right, you are wrong parking hard up against the line. Maybe not legally wrong, but definitely inconsiderate.
Until we were expectant grandparents DH drove a two door Mercedes Coupé, so I fully understand the problems of small spaces and two door cars, but it's not a huge problem for passengers to get out before the driver pulls into a parking space.

When I see some of the things on Gransnet that Grans have to put up with, I can well imagine that the shouty woman in the OP was having a bad day. Still, she obviously was not in the right. If all the parent and child spaces were full, she was just as much entitled/obliged to go to a disable place as you were.

However, I have no idea about the legal position on that one, but I can imagine that registered disabled people have more right to a disabled parking space than parents with children do, as the special parking spaces for them are probably only a courtesy measure.

My children also joke about parking on the parent+child spaces - it's especially giggle-worthy if they're driving the car.

Firstly those spaces should be labelled 'carer and child' the relationship between the child and adult is irrelevant. Also I was told by shop manager that disabled and parent and child are interchangeable so both can use both. Our local farm equipment suppliers have 3 disabled parking spaces because they have to by law but to date (8 yrs on) not one disabled person has used them because, I imagine, limited numbers of disabled people buy combine harvesters etc. So we are told we can use them and of course would move immediately if the spaces were needed. One reason I think some people use these spaces is that new cars are much bigger these days and it can be impossible to open the doors when others are parked up against you. My daughter once had to wait over half an hour in the rain before she could get her baby into the car because she could not access the doors on either side of her car. She had been unable to find a wider space.

JackyB
Re: Your comment that 'the shouty woman' was 'just as much entitled/obliged to go to a disabled space as we were'....

As neither DH or myself is in any way disabled, if there was no 'parent and child' space available, we would not ever use a 'disabled' space.
My main issue with the other Gran was that she, for some weird reason, thought we should give up our 'parent and child' space to her, and move to a 'disabled' space, where, as we are not disabled, we would have been liable to get a £50-00 fine as that is the level which that particular car park has set 'improper use' fines at!