Negative attitude

That's quite sad Diddy . What has made you feel differently about the situation of late ? You have managed to rise above it for some years I presume ? To be honest you don't sound very happy , with your marriage in general .

Hi well I have lived in Sweden for fifty years and our driving licences have always been accepted as ID, I dont have any other ID, I get money out of the Bank etc with it I was there today in fact,I have a British Passport and have never used it here, only my driving licence.
Other ID used a lot is Bank ID, for Internet Banking that is. Do you live in Sweden too?

monologues.co.uk/Pam_Ayres/Ask_My_Husband.htm
I always think this poem sum up my beloved OH. ?

In Sweden the driving licence it the standard ID, it is accepted everywhere, he has said today he must apply for a new one, so problem over.

It's not the standard ID in Sweden - the standard one is the National ID card/Identitetskort that you get from Skatteverket (Tax Office) or the Police that are background checked. Driving licences are accepted as ID though - but they tend to be a bit pickier in my experience and not accept them if they look like they have any damage (they don't accept non-Swedish passports as ID either).

Diddy do you love this man? If the answers yes and he's always been the same then that's it but do you know I m wondering ?

Thanks Nannaand Grampy, no I havent, other than say he should calm down, and think of his health when he sounds off,unfortunately he is a person who likes everything to circulate around him, not really caring for others, he is happiest when telling people how good he is at everything, and boring them to tears to be honest, there is no great point in talking it over with him, if it doesnt affect him he wont listen. Thank you for writing, I will do my best.

I have to say Grampy used to be very much the same. His glass was always half empty whereas mine is half full.

Some years ago we had a heart to heart and I told him I wasn't buying into his frame of mind anymore. Because I listened and there, there, there'd him I felt I was giving him the attention and approval and even agreement he wanted .

It took a while, and more than a few cross words ( mainly on his side) but he stopped being Grumpy all the time . I just wasn't going to feed the grumpiness.

He still sounds off to me, as I do to him but the constant avalanche is long gone thank goodness .

Have you talked about it Diddy and told him how it affects you ?

Thank you everyone, I agree with most of you, but at times even my positive nature takes a fall because of constant moaning, but I promise I will try to ignore it and not let it affect me so much.
In Sweden the driving licence it the standard ID, it is accepted everywhere, he has said today he must apply for a new one, so problem over.
I will think of your suggestions next time there is a moan, I promise, thank you again.

Can he not get a proper Swedish credit card-style ID card? Official bodies are much happier and less picky with the formal ID-checked "leg" than driving licences and passports

I'm inclined to think like BlueBell if he cant let off steam with you who can he do it with. We would both ring each other if something went a bit scewiff and indeed is something went well. We just communicate with each other all the time and take the good with the bad. Perhaps you have just had enough of him full stop Diddyl?

my other half can moan for Scotland and win gold medals at it,always been the same ..just let it wash over you or nod and agree if he really expects an answer.I married him knowing he was like that so I never expected him to change ....I am excessively easy going though ...maybe that helps .

Aren't husband and wives supposed to share their frustrations (I don't know I never had one who was interested in anything I did) but I would expect each to use the other for their moans and groans who else should he unload on If it is so annoying to you maybe you are a little bit out of love and when that happens you noticed every little thing that you don't like Are there still things you do love about him ?

My husband has always been a bit like that too but he does not ring me to tell me things. I just make the right noises and then forget what he's just said. I would probably be feeling like you are if I let it get to me. Luckily my very positive attitude seems to be rubbing off on him as he's getting much better as he gets older.
Can you try to ignore it like I do.