GB 2018 - no more manners?

I don't like to see people leaning on one elbow whilst they're eating with just a fork, but resting on them during a meal I can't see an issue with.
Phones are my bug bear. I think its the height of rudeness at the table.

I have to say the phones on the table leaves me horrified - I only have two friends who do this and we talk about them in a very judgey way when they’ve left.

Bluebelle exactly re elbows.years ago when I stayed with French families, the rule was hands on the table when not holding knife and fork.

I m sure manners change over the years doffing caps for instance calling people sir or madam and often people in authority actually cause some of these problems I ve known teachers encourage children to call them by their first name My grandson was might,y confused to be called mate by a teacher then told off and to his black and white male thinking he was his mate I ve heard police call crims ‘mate’ of ‘my friend’ when arresting them
I m sure men must be quite confused do they stand for women, in this day of equality, or maybe they’re transgender, or cross dressers they are standing for I know managers who are fb ‘friends’ with staff or even go out drinking or partying with them the lines are so blurred nowadays .....it’s not just the young

By the way why is it rude to put your elbows on the table, feet and shoes I understand but why elbows?

I'd be happy to give up shaking hands if it helps us avoid 'flu.

Isn’t it what distinguishes us from animals? Good grief! Anything goes today.
Bad mannered people would get no where with me,I detest it.

I forgot to say that it was our Christmas lunch!!

I was horrified at our extended family lunch when several people placed their mobile phones on the table as if it was quite the done thing. This was a 40+ year old and her 60+ mother.

Bluebell we have been trying to get our Grandchildren use tissues or the crook of their arm when sneezing or coughing.
But even using a hand (I carry anti bacterial gel) is better than blasting germs in to the air.

Coughs and sneezes spread diseases
This is not a matter of manners its about public health.

I have no issues with elbows on tables or people eating as soon as their food arrives I know my OH wont eat anything thats cooled ,so he eats it quickly even if it burns his mouth...lol. I hate swearing ,especially really young people swearing I think its vile .I walked behind a group of teenagers last week and every second word was an F or a C or a B word.If they'd been mine I'd have been mortified .

Well you re not supposed to cover your sneezes with your hand as these germs then pass to the next person you touch you are supposed to sneeze or cough into the crook of your arm
When I m eating with others I always tell everyone to start as their plate arrives as I can’t abide luke warm food
I honestly don’t look at elbows on the table, that doesn’t bother me at all, what I do hate is noisy eaters or people who don’t shut there mouths when eating

One little thing which annoys me at table is starting to eat before everyone has been served. (I am talking about home, not in restaurants where there can be delays.) My daughter does this, helps herself from the dishes on the table and starts to eat before anyone else is served, despite me frequently asking her not to do so. I think it is so rude. Particularly as it is me doing the serving.

I don't think shaking hands is important, and elbows on the table are fine when people have finished eating and are just talking. The other examples of desirable behaviour in the OP I think we should keep.

The attitude to swearing has changed a LOT in my lifetime.

What not covering nose or mouth when sneezing or coughing??
Never manners I would make it an arrestable offence!!

Sorry if I sound like a GOW, winter white (lovely name!) but haven't a lot if those things already disappeared. Oh dear, think I'll sign off and take a chill pill!

In some situations, having formal rules to follow can be helpful - especially in another culture but overall, isn’t the issue of manners all about thinking of the effect of your behaviour on others eg not letting a door swing closed in someone’s face or sneezing your germs all over them or allowing someone to stand who is probably uncomfortable so doing. There’s also an interesting difference between manners and etiquette and non-U language - putting milk in second or first, being critical of whether someone says loo, toilet etc.

Horrible suggestion.

Just been reading up on Japan which we will, hopefully, visit this year and they are very formal. Think I will like it. Who knew it was rude to leave your chopsticks sticking up in the bowl? Apparently it is to do with funerals. I put mine on the side because so they don't fall over!

There was something else in the list - about giving up your seat to someone who needs it more. I commute regularly to London and regularly see young men and women offering seats to older/pregnant/disabled passengers without being asked

As you say, it just says ‘poll’ so it has no validity without context. There would surely be a range of difference depending on age,gender, class, region and context. Of the ones listed I would always end up with my elbows on the table at some time during the meal. I don’t usually wait for the host to tell me where to sit,I normally ask. I only swear at home when no one other than DH is here - usually at the radio. But the list can’t be chilling can it when we have no idea where it came from.

I certaintly would not accept them, grrrrr

I am just coming to the end of Bill Bryson’s ‘Notes from a Small Island’ and he is adamant that it is our good manners and little social niceties that set us apart from other nations. Like the original poster, I also find it chilling that these things are being wiped away almost at a stroke and it behoves those of us to whom it matters not to let the drawbridge down and open up our castle to barbarians! ?

Grrr, all those little niceties that make everyday life a little bit more bearable are being dropped because the next generation is in too much of a hurry.

My OH had a manager who declared that sending texts to thank someone or to acknowledge something was to be stopped. He said it was a waste of time.