'The wa'er in Majorca ...!'
'Can there really be such poverty in England?' - Lord Curzon's reply when napkin rings ('serviette roundels?') were explained to him.
Mymadeupname & Sluttygran, absolutely seupah brilliant posts!
Jalima, your cupboard counts on two counts! Shows artistic instincts + fact that you really have much more important things to do.
Granny23, hope this doesn't sound disrespectful, but anyone who tells people to improve themselves ain't posh. It's marvelous that you love your sister but please don't ever think she's better than you.
As my Nanny Nana used to say, 'Morals not modes.'
Joan, the 'port out, starboard home' origin is acccurate, I think. A friend used to work for the P.&O. (this was in the '20's-'40's) and he knew lots about their history. It was from him we learnt about it.
The Real 'Uns shop as little as possible, but when they must, try to do so from charities (RNLI or Gurkha tea, almost any charity for Christmas cards.) Donate old clothes to Oxfam & also buy there, thus frequently clad in friends' and relations' cast-offs. Think it's marvelously funny if made aware of fact. Dress their children in hand-me-downs. Usually v. much at home in church & can frequently sing hymns surprisingly well. Have not moved to the country, just always been there, like the Pennines. Actually know the locals, unlike week-end trendies or new arrivals. Usually more comfortable outdoors - including in cemeteries - than in (though there's not much difference, considering their houses) and very happy around not only horses but also bulls and tanks. When on tractors (which is often) somehow manage to look as though they should have lances. Own & use nail-brushes & clothes-brushes. Use white or yellow for baby things, not pink or blue. Frequently ignorant on many subjects but may have written the definitive work on something like Coptic Pediment Design. Know how to polish silver. Dread facing God about the double-glazing, even if the National Trust made them do it. Worry about dry rot, the garden, & foxes being sad now they can't enjoy the hunt, but not about class.
I was brought up to believe that thinking about it ('poshness' by any name) automatically renders the thinker a bit unsound. ('Not posh', 'non-U', or any of the other words or phrases that the so-called posh would never actually use.) Showing off, making people feel awkward, being pretentious, being selfish, greedy, or picky - all most unsound, don't you know.
I was also taught that most of us will think about it ... it's impossible not to hear and see differences ... but if you start imagining it matters, watch out.
J.M. Barrie captures it in 'Peter Pan.' Hook is eaten alive with jealousy of Pan because he always has good form. The fact that Pan never thinks about good form is what does it. Hook knows that he has to think about it & can't bear the fact!
Like Garnet, I was (thank heaven) a child-of-all-camps, often quite literally as my family were a mix of Bohemian, old-fashioned, working class, v. upper-middle with traces of Scots nobility, and everything in between. The shortest summation I can give of the 'real thing:' bred-in-bone confidence, and kindness. If you're snooty you're probably a would-be. Usually the older the money/family, the more they'll have in common with what we used to call the working classes ('lower-bracket sub-securely fiscally situated' now, I suppose) & the less they'll care about show. Can be brusque but usually have kind hearts even if no coronets; admire people who aren't cowed by 'social things.'
There's no way to fake the sort of confidence those people have. Wish I'd more of those particular genes. Not to be posh - just because it would be nice to be more confident!
The Princess who felt the pea wasn't 'p.' (Posh or pukkah.) First of all she felt the pea, then she couldn't hide the fact that she'd felt it. Probably not even English ... some sort of dreadful middle-European pseudo-royalty, all filigree and fuss, though if you're her hostess, and you're 'p,' you'll never let on that you think that, you'll just be fritefully concerned about her. (In fact if you're really p. this Princess wouldn't be staying with you anyway!)
The Two Fat Ladies of Blessed Memory definitely real 'uns. (You have to see Clarissa Dickson-Wright's full name to believe it! I'll try to link. No held breath please.) Likewise Robert Hardy & Jeremy Brett. Joanna Lumley, though she should never have stopped fighting for the Gurkhas. I admire her for what she's done but it's not something you stop doing. It's not about losing pukkah-points because I don't care about that, I just think everyone should try & help the Gurkhas.
The whole thing is wonderfully funny as long as it's not used to hurt people or stop them doing things they want to do. I don't think there'll ever be a 'strata-free' society. As with religion, new ideas & ideals will take - are taking - the place of old. Fame, 'status,' etc. Plus c'est change O mores. It's like 'The Admirable Crichton.' So we might as well have fun with it, enjoy 'The Diary of a Nobody,' G&S ('Hearts just as pure and fair may beat in Belgrave Square as in the lowly air of Seven Dials ...') & the supreme Daisy Ashford:
'You can help me perhaps to be more like a gentleman said Mr Salteena getting rarther hot I am quite alright as they say but I would like to be the real thing can it be done he added slapping his knees.
I dont quite know said Bernard it might take a good time.'
If I were posh, of course, I'd never have written any of this.