How much do you spend on a wedding gift?

I agree with most here that £50 is more than enough. Like many others I hate giving money. Especially when you get no thanks as happened at my nephew's wedding. As we had to leave money (in an envelope ) on an overflowing plate with some falling on the floor we weren't even sure they'd got it.

Fifty pounds is handsome. And you good wishes of course.

My friends who got married after living together said they wanted for nothing but please would everyone give something to their favourite charity I LIKE that
Another friend who had a 50 th anniversary party with food and drink said they needed nothing but ‘if wanted’ (I like that) could we give to a roof appeal for their favourite community theatre
Of course it’s practical to give money and I ve no problem with that at all my problem is being ASKED for money it’s all so mercenary

£80 is too much.
I don't agree with cash instead of presents, especially if the couple have lived together for years.

I can remember getting an invite from a couple I barely knew getting married. I had never met her and him about half a dozen times. They wanted money so I gave a cheque for £50. The only thank you I got was a round robin email saying thank you to everyone. I wasn't very happy.

For me it would depend entirely on who was getting married. Normally I would also do a cross-stitch wedding sampler as a gift.

We lived in Ireland for a while and there giving money to the happy couple is the done thing. I was somewhat gobsmacked when it is almost “expected” to receive upwards from 150 + euros. If its a close member of the family it could be as much as 300 euros. I actually knew a few people that kindly “refused” an invitation because they just couldn’t afford to go. One friend that I had told me that they were going to a family wedding and by the time they paid for 2 night accommodation (night before and the night of the wedding) outfits for the family of 4 and the present the cost of the weekend could have paid for a 2 week holiday abroad.

I would give either £50 or £100, giving £80 seems like you had to put a lot of thought into it which somehow (for me) strikes the wrong note. The idea of £50 plus a small personal gift also sounds good to me.

My usual rule for not v close relatives, or friends and their children, is £50 if we're invited to the evening party only, £100 if we're invited to the whole shebang.

When our oldest son got married they said they didn’t want any Presents only our Presence at their wedding but if we wanted to give something a small cash contribution to their honeymoon,they went to Edinburgh for a weekend,it would be greatly appreciated ?

I give £30 if invited to the evening do only, £50 if invited to the whole event and £100 for close relatives. I gave more for my own children.

I hate the request for money too. If not given the option, my rule is to try and cover the amount spent per guest on the wedding breakfast (and evening do). £80 sounds OK for two people, as I think that most wedding breakfasts are about £35 per head, and this would allow something for the buffet in the evening.

I think £80 is generous. I would probably give £50 at most.

Oh dear... this all makes my own wedding plans look so miserly... registry office just us, then off to a friend's field for a BBQ party... only request is everyone wears wellies and brings a little something food/drink wise, no gifts required ( we are very poor!)

Exactly janesinsworth. Champagne after the service, three courses, or more during the day with generous supply of wine. Musicians or pianist during the meal. An evening celebration with dancing and food later. I’m very happy to give cash rather than a gift. We didn’t go to a recent evening do because we had the toddlers so their parents could relax. I sent £50 but would have liked to send more

Personally, £50 for a relative is more than enough, for close family I would and do, give more.

sodapop maybe they’ve spent all their holiday money on giving their friends and family a fabulous day of celebration.

That is generous Ffion and quite sufficient. I don't mind giving money as it means no wading through lists etc. I do feel though if couples have everything they need and are asking for holiday money etc then maybe they could ask for donations to a favourite charity as they are so fortunate.

It depends who the gift us four. Of course you'd give more to family, but I was invited to dils sisters wedding and I gave £40 from me and my dd. I'd rather do that than buy an unwanted present. A close family member is of course a different matter, you be giving a lot more.

I don’t see a problem with asking for/giving money.
When we lived in Hongkong we went to several Chinese weddings and the custom
was to give ‘lucky money’ in a special red packet. Very sensible in my view.

If a couple request money instead of a gift, I heave a sigh of relief that I won’t have to wade through a list hoping there will be something suitable left on it, and I just think of it as payment for the occasion - the meal and the party so I think £80 - 100 is appropriate, perhaps more if it’s very lavish.
When one of my young relatives got married last year the invitation included overnight accommodation and breakfast the next day at the venue, so our gift included a sum of money to reflect the fact that we hadn’t had to stay overnight in a hotel.

Would agree with others that £50 is plenty and if you spend another £5 or £10 on a nice photo frame or similar
that would be more than enough. If everyone gave £ £50 that would amount to a fantastic luxury break for them, but actually I don’t like these requests for money, it costs enough to be a guest with outfits, transport, and often 2 overnights in hotels.

More than generous in my book, I would never give that much to anyone other than my own flesh and blood.
My nephew is getting married next year and they are already living together and bought their own house so I expect this will be the solution of what gift to give them. Won't be as much as that though.

£50 would be my limit also. The fact is that if every guest or couple gave £50, they are going to have a very tidy sum, and there's a very good chance that closer family members will donate more, so please only give what you feel you can afford. Remember the day is going to cost you more than that with new outfits and hair dressing etc.. Just my opinion

I think it’s horrible asking for money although I understand the logic behind it It depends how close you are to the couple and how much you feel you can afford I d never be able to give £80 but if that’s in your abilities and you re comfortable with it, fine, BUT never be ashamed or feel you ‘have to’ give a certain amount ( or the going rate) as a gift should make everyone happy the giver as well as the receiver

I'm not an enthusiast of the large weddings, with day and evening do's in big expensive hotels. But - it isn't my wedding. Big Weddings are the thing now, whereas "in my day" it was a frock from Wallace and food back at our house to celebrate us getting married some time after buying a house together.
Having said that, I'm easy with young couple's who have lived together for several years asking for money rather than a toaster. I know one young couple who suggested their guests gave to an identified charity. Generous of them.
I wouldn't feel embarrassed about any amount Ffion. I'm sure young people are pleased with any amount they receive. I tend to give more to close relatives or friends than people I don't see often. Is that mean