Bringing up bi-lingual children

My three were brought up bilingual and are eternally grateful and are bringing their own children up to be bilingual too. This is one thing I am positively passionate about, so I'll refrain from commenting here.

Obviously the Health Visitor was way out of line with her remarks and I am quite shocked that this came from a Dane - Denmark being relatively small and Danish being a language spoken by so few people, they all have a high level of mastery of German or English, and I would have thought that they didn't only encourage bilingualism, but took it pretty much for granted.

When GD 3 was little about 3 my daughter returned from a visit to the Health visitor almost hysterical. Apparently the child was fat, backward and had speech development problems. I eventually managed to calm my DD down. The next scheduled visit to the HV I took my now 4 year old GD. A different HV wasnpleased with my GD and didn't find any problems. I reported the first health visitor but was fobbed of with platitudes and my granddaughter had not seen a Health visitor since. These so called health visitors are not always right. If you have concerns consult another proffessional.

My pre school grandchildren are being brought up bilingual and their language skills are excellent they are far above their expected level for their age. Their understanding of how language works is a pleasure to hear.
There is lots of research to show being bilingual helps the child's brain to develop so I am not sure why the health visitor has an issue with it.
I think your daughter should trust her instincts and carry on doing what she thinks is right.

I think that that health visitor doesn't know what she's talking about. How ridiculous to say that the child will be delayed in learning to speak. Utter nonsense.

wonderful to be bilingual. Hope HV will soon stop visiting.

This is a subject close to my heart - I worked with children learning English as an Additional Language (EAL) at County Level. I totally agree that bilingualism is massively advantageous on so many levels so when my daughter and her French husband had our DGSs, I actively encouraged them to speak both languages and consequently the boys (8 and 6) are fluent in both French and English. It is important that whatever language/s the children hear is good rather than a parent using a language that they are not confident using. The attitude of the HV visitor is outdated and totally out of order!

Health visitors think they are God...carry on doing what YOU think is right.

Talking of picking up languages easily - when we lived in the Gulf we had a Swedish family move in next door. Naturally enough, the children spoke nothing but Swedish. The little girl was 5 or nearly so, the boy was a little older.

The only school they could attend was English speaking, and children had to have a certain level before being admitted. The little girl attended an English speaking nursery for just a month - and that was enough for her to start at the school.
The boy took a little longer, but in just a very few months, you would never have guessed that both of them were not born native speakers.

innishowen: you are of course quite right, and if the HV I am complaining about has run into that kind of family, her concern becomes rather more understandable!

There is research which shows that children exposed to more than one language at home may speak later than the average child but will speak both when really and is probably understanding both languages more than anyone realises. Being bilingual brings such great advantages so continue as you are. I would ask to change your health visitor and give the reasons you have written here for that decision and I wouldn't care if she was offended,

Health visitor is out of order. My child grew up in another country speaking two languages, now speaks three fluently as an adult and is confident in others too. ( Which means he is able to work internationally and travel with ease, respecting and engaging with other cultures) All the multilingual children I have worked with have always managed really well, even those with severe disabilities. Communication in expanded and any forms is to be celebrated and encouraged.

Thank you all for your advice.

May I please say that neither I nor the rest of the family would dream of accusing all Health Visitors of this kind of attitude. Most are indeed well-qualified professionals, but this family has been unfortunate.

There is nothing odd about the HV still calling - this is normal here in Denmark.

What this particular woman is basing her assessment on none of us know at the moment. I have suggested to my DD that her husband, being the Danish person in the household should ask her what the assessment is based on, and if necessary write a formal complaint to the HV's supervisor.

I assume that the guidelines for assessing children in immigrant households where the parents have a poor or practically non-existent command of Danish are being brought into play here, although they are not applicable.

I myself have tried unsuccessfully for years to get the teaching profession in Denmark to realise and act upon the fact that Danish language tuition for immigrants is nowhere near good enough.

The child's hearing and motor skills are normal, but the crèche he has been going to until a fortnight ago, he is now in kindergarten, was badly run with no-one really having time to talk to the children. Latterly, he was, of course, amongst the eldest children there, which cannot have provide much incentive to him to do any speaking.

Thanks again for your interest.

I hit post before I wished the OP well and to relax and enjoy the little boy. Share his language journey together and please be reassured!!

Another retired RHV here and feeling totally exasperated that the OP describes inaccurate information and an unprofessional attitude. Please don't tar us all with the same brush.

This child is obviously blessed with the opportunity to learn two languages and it is to be applauded, not judged. Yes there may well be some slight language delay if you are only assessing one of the languages in isolation, but in total this child will already have a far better grasp of language than those learning just the one. Being exposed at such a young age will ensure development of correct pronunciation and inflection - something adult language learners often fail at - and especially with a difficult language such as Danish.

All HV's should have a line manager, and if no one mentions the situation to the relevant person then nothing will change. Any manager worth their salt alerted to this situation should offer an update/training/awareness to bring the professional in question up to date as part of a mandatory professional appraisal procedure.

I did postgraduate speech and language development qualifications following my RHV training as this aspect of child development I always found amazing and in turn it enhanced my relationship with speech and language therapists.

If children are going to be bilingual it helps if they start before 5-6 years as then they learn naturally from parents. Your dd is sound like she is doing fine. If the child is happy and can communicate to both parents surely there is no problem. The child will speak more Danish as goes to nursery school and then school.

In my experience many Health Visitors are would-be 'brain surgeons' (not literally) simply because they think they know it all. I have friends who have children who speak 3 languages at home (Punjabi, English and Dutch) - what a great advantage in our multi-cultural society, and they are well-balanced, happy children. Just listen to the HV and then ignore her!

from bilingual households, I meant to say!

The HV is talking rubbish. Esp. when we were living overseas, we knew so many families where children were brought up bilingual - one parent speaking one, the other no. 2.
We even knew a couple or two where the child grew up with 3 - e.g. Greek from one parent, German from the other - and English spoken between the parents. The children would sometimes confuse them at first but would sort them out sooner or later.

Dds have friends whose non-native English speaking parent never talked to them in their own language - Norwegian, Arabic and Vietnamese are 3 I can think of.

In every case the now grown-up children are really cross with the parents who didn't speak to them when they were of an age to pick the languages up effortlessly.

Ulli58 even 30 years ago, your the speech therapist you saw was unfortunately out of date! Bilingualism is advantageous and this has been known from studies since the early 80s. There is often a very slight, non-significant delay in expressive language in children from, but once children reach school age, they are at an advantage. Health Visitors, Speech and Language Therapists and other clinicians are obliged to keep up with research and good practice. Sadly, there are ill-informed and opinionated people in every walk of life!

I have a Spanish/American friend who is married to a Japanese man. Their daughter, now a medical student speaks and writes fluent Spanish, English and Japanese. She just grew up speaking Japanese to her father and either English or Spanish to her mother. English obviously at school and with friends.

You are totally correct, grandtanteJE65, they are doing things right. Besides, learning additional languages reduces the chance of dementia!

Keep up the Danish and English!

This is the best time to teach the child both languages, it will so much easier for him. I am Welsh & was totally Welsh speaking until I was almost 5, we never saw anyone English in them days (I am 74) of hardly any travel. A new industry was built near my village & my mum took in lodgers & that was how I learnt English, took years for me to become confident speaking English, thought in Welsh & translated in my mind before speaking, that child will speak both without any hesitation, oh by the way I have now lived in England for 50 plus years, my husband was Scottish.

Both our children were raised bi-lingually from birth, with me speaking to them in my mother tongue of German and my husband in his (English). There was a slight delay in my son (the older child) speaking either language but he understood both and his hearing was checked and found to be fine. This was 30 years ago and there did not seem to be much knowledge then in Britain about raising children bi-lingually. So much so that we were sent to a speech therapist whose recommendation was that I only spoke English to him! I replied that this is not an option and did not bother to return for any subsequent appointments. My son started to speak English first even responding to my German in English. He picked up speaking German soon afterwards through being with other German children at an international Kindergarten and school. My daughter spoke both languages sooner, having presumably taken the lead from her brother. Both have continued to keep up both languages and have benefitted from being bi-lingual.

90% of people speak English so why bother?

We have friends who only speak Russian at home and only watch Russian tv. Their little boy was not getting a chance to hear any English. He started school last year and the parents said airily "it's no problem, he will get a classroom assistant". Their older son got an assistant until he could speak English. This really annoys me as they could have taken the child to playgroup to mix with local children but didn't bother.