Things your mother said!

My mother frequently called me a daft apeth. I always wondered what an apeth was, and thought she was likening me to a monkey. It wasn't until years later that I realised it was 'a daft happorth' - apparently a Yorkshire expression, (she was from Sheffield).

Vest and plastic mac - yes!! and a hat if it was cold.

When I was being pathetic 'you look like a dying duck in a thunderstorm'

'How's the enemy?' - referring to time, she didn't work, had home help twice a week and didn't drive so didn't have to run me around!!

'What will the neighbours think' grrrr

My mum used to say “ don’t come running to me if you break your leg” also the obligatory make Sure you’ve got clean underwear on.
My grandma used to say if we had a cough and didn’t want to go to school “it wasn’t the cough that carried her off it was the coffin they carried her off in”

Close your legs there is a bus coming. That got me in trouble when I worked I told a lady that and she stood up and asked if it was her's. Everyone started laughing.

grannygravy I used to get the one about clean and good condition underwear although not about it needing to match.

I was involved in a car accident and was taken to hospital. I was moving house at the time and dressed in scruffy clothes including my comfy underwear that had seen better days. Yep, there I was in a&e thinking "OMG I have my scruffy underwear on!"

‘If the wind changes you’ll be stuck like that’

‘Don’t care was made to care’

Loving all these..so funny!... and many my mum said too. I always remember one particularly funny/poignant one from a book of children's sayings I have.. "mummy tells me off with a nasty smack in her voice"... I know just what she meant! ?

Mum was mostly a " do as you would be done by" & " never judge a book by its cover" kind of person. But a phrase that has passed down and DGC now say is " cheatie comes beatie" if anyone tries to fix the dice or look at someones hand in cards etc ???

No peace for the wicked and I want never gets.
If I went to mother saying I had a tummy ache or a headache she would tell me it was the wickedness coming out ☹️

I lived in Liverpool as a child, and if we were trying to fool my mother she would say " I didnt come over on the boat yesterday" which I later learnt was a reference to the poor Irish

"No sense, no feeling!"
I was surprised at how often that applied when my own kids were growing up.

"I'll bang your heads together, you two!"
Ditto

If asked what was for tea or dinner, mum would sometimes reply, 'If it, if i've got it you can have it, If I haven't then you can't'!!!

Yes the work ethic was well and truly drummed into us wasn't it dbDB77 . Sitting down with nothing to do was frowned on, knitting, potatoes to peel, brass or silver to polish, all jobs to do sitting down

Yes NannyJan - "If a job's worth doing it's worth doing properly."
And "The devil makes work for idle fingers."
And "A fair day's work for a fair day's pay."
The good old Protestant work ethic - no wonder I feel guilty idling my time reading GN threads

If one of us children was caught picking our nose, Mum (and my grandma) would say,
"Come out, it's not a chip shop!"

Dooh! I meant sometimes a dog.

When dad went out he was 'going to see a man about a horse' or sometimes a horse.

If mam thought I looked a mess I was also told I looked like I'd been dragged through a hedge backwards ...or sometimes I looked like 'lizzie from the felling' whoever that was. I've never heard that one from anyone else.

My DH loves to hear me tell him the things my mother said.

Men only want ONE thing!

You can't make a fire from old cokes.

Both these things are true in my opinion though I hated to hear them quoted.

Now DH and I often quote her in some situations when we're watching a film on TV.

Just remembered another one...
whenever I asked where she was going......'there and back to see how far it is'. If I asked what she'd been doing.......'made a shirt and gone to Leeds'!??? What was all that about??

Do as you like, you'll live a day longer!

Oh ‘don’t care was made to care’ and ‘you know what thought thought don’t you?’

No

Brilliant remember my gran when you asked ‘what’s for dinner?’ She said

Dolls eyes and watercress’ utterly baffling.

She was a welsh speaker maybe lost in translation

Also ‘red hat no drawers’ my teenage dd had no idea what drawers were

When I was, not she I was. Sheesh!

My mother used to say, when we misbehaved “You’re enough to make a saint swear!”
She I was a teenager, going out to a disco, I’d ask her how I looked, and her only compliment would be “a blind man would be glad to see you.”

Charley my mum used to use the starving Africans to get us to eat too. One day my sister put her chips in an envelope and asked where she should post them