What our parents did that we wouldn't dare to...

My mum used to tell me she left my oldest brother in the pram park outside Woolworths not long after having him, going home she kept thinking she was missing something. When she got to my nans she asked where the baby was..... still in the pram park out Woolworths ?

My parents never smacked me, but I smacked my children very occasionally, out of desperation when I was very tired. I think it’s something to be ashamed of. My grandchildren are never smacked.

At four I was regularly put on a 'Greenline' bus to Hemel Hempstead to stay with my Aunt, a round trip of some 60 miles. I never thought anything of it. The bus driver always put me off at the right stop and as far as I can remember my Aunt was always waiting to pick me up. The only thing I ever lost was my sister's Golly doll that she gave me to keep me company.

I got sent to the local shop at 4 to buy pepper. Only time I had an adult walk me home from juniors was when I caught chicken pox. We used to go swimming at the local pool or take ourselves to the park. As I got into double figures I always borrowed a baby and pram to play ‘mum’ with.

I played outside and went around on my own from an early age. So did my children, now in their mid-forties. My grandchildren, 6 and just 10), don’t. The 10-year-old will go to a neighbouring house on his own, but I don’t think he’s ever been on a bus alone. The main reason is that there is so much more traffic now, so roads are more dangerous. Of course it depends where you live - they are in central London. We are not so silly as to think there are more ‘funny men’/paedophiles now, but the said ‘funny men’ are now much more likely to have a car the child could be pulled into..

My infant school was nearby, about 5 mins away but involved crossing the railway at a level crossing. On my first day I was taken by our next door neighbour's daughter who was only a year older than me. Two years later I took my brother on his first day. I don't think my mum ever took us!

I wouldn't dare let a schoolchild walking home from the school bus come into our house to use our toilet for fear that parents would accuse us of abusing the child.

My parents wouldn't have thought twice about letting a child in to use the toilet, or and adult, come to that.

I was sent shopping with money and a note for the shopkeeper before I could read, but only to the shops on our side of Main St. If my mother wanted something for a shop on the opposite side of the street, she phoned the shop my sister's godmother ran and asked her to cross the road when she saw me on the opposite pavement and take me across the street. When I had finished shopping, I went into her shop and she saw me across the road again.

Us locked in the car in a pub car park with a packet of crisps and a (maybe) a lemonade whilst daddy and an uncle had a couple of pints ?

Leaving sleeping baby in car while nipping into shops.

Humbertbear Children learn from experience, and most of them lack experience in many life-skills these days. From a very young age I knew that knives were sharp, fire could burn, water could drown you, falling could hurt you, and to be cautious around traffic and strangers.
I was taught how to cope with situations, and learned to use my own intelligence and common-sense to assess any dangers. In the past children were expected to help at home in any way possible, and were adept at many jobs from an early age.
I think that it is sad that we over-protect our children now. There will always be risks, no matter how we try to shelter them. Not allowing them to learn coping mechanisms means that when a difficult situation does arrive they have no idea how to deal with it.
I think that this immaturity is also behind much of the bad behaviour and crimes committed by young people.

Haughtiest should be eldest ???

I went to school on my own from aged 5 and my sister went to the swimming pool on her own from aged 7.
My haughtiest has just allowed my dgd to go to the local shop alone, aged almost 8 . She (the Mum) was very nervous but felt it was the right time. I agree though I was nervous too. There is a road to cross but mum made sure daughter was safe to do this by watching her several times first. Hard to make these decisions!

These are amazing tales of The Way We Were, when viewed through the lens of the 21st century. We experienced so much more freedom, responsibility and danger than subsequent generations.

I doubt anyone would want a return to those times, but I wonder if a certain resilience and fortitude has been lost forever. When the young football team were trapped in those caves last year I did think about how the event and aftermath would have played out if it had happened in the UK.

Purpledaffodil Yes the fifties were safer. My parents had no issues in letting me walk home from my friends house a mile from ours and in the dark although I did carry a torch as we lived on a new estate that had yet to give us street lighting.

tanith, my mother had a similar experience to you. When she was five her mother had a second baby. It was decided my mother should spend the summer with her granny in Wales. Mum was put on a train in Liverpool with a packet of sandwiches. A married couple were asked to keep an eye on her. Mum said she was terrified and wet herself, but said nothing to the couple. Luckily her granny was waiting at the other end. What a huge risk to take with a child! My mum never got over it.

My parents smoked around us.
My mum used to give us a 'good hiding' and also verbal put downs (Its a wonder we have any self esteem!)
She used to make us go out to play if it was sunny, by locking the back door so we couldn't get back in, if necessary.
The whole family used to make oink noises when my sister reached for an extra slice of bread..
We must have spent our whole lives being 'triggered'.

I used to walk across the fields on my way home from primary school and down the lanes in the dark from secondary school. I also went swimming in the sea unsupervised with a group of 3-4 friends when we were around 13/14 after school. I also used to go off for walks on the hills with a book to read during the holidays on my own. Of course we didn't have such wide ranging TV news in those days. Do you think this is what has made us so protective today?

Sadly you’re right Alexa it’s is well documented and agreed by professionals that ‘stranger danger’ is very rare. Sexual predators are often known to the child. In one way or another - a babysitter, a friend of the family, the piano teacher ....
so all in all, maybe our parents were right - letting us walk to school, go to the park get on buses ‘amongst strangers’. Safer than we all think.

At seven I used to come home from school on a bus with a key round my neck. I was too small to reach the Yale lock so was told to go across the road (the A10!) to Mr Poole the newsagent who used to shut his shop, take me back across the road, open the door for me and hand me back the key. I wasn’t too good at telling time so my father used to leave me a pate with biscuits and an alarm clock set for 5 o’clock so I could watch children’s hour. Then I used to get a kitchen chair to stand on to reach the sink so I could peel potatoes ready for dinner when my parents came home. We had a coal fire which was ready laid for me to light in the winter which was suddenly considered to be too dangerous for me and an oil heater was purchased instead!! And it was all considered perfectly normal!!

Our parents

Smoked in the house
Smacked us when we were naughty
Left us home alone in school holidays ‘don’t open the door’
Didn’t help us at all with our homework
Was on the side of the teacher, every time
Wouldn’t listen to tell tales (from us or others)

And my sister and I loved them very much.
Mum died last year at the age of 86y
Dad died at the age of 47y

Isn’t it a pity that today’s children have so little freedom? Like many people posting here, I used to walk to Junior school on my own and I was never, ever taken to secondary school. My own DD flew unaccompanied to New York to visit her auntie when she was only 8 and the following year insisted on her 6 year old brother going with her. My grand children aged 13,10 and 7 have never even walked down their residential road on their own and because of where they live even the 13 year old has to be taken to school every day . I fear they are missing out on developing independence.

My parents and our respectable neighbours were not aware that the sexual predator was not one of the tramps or a foreign soldier, but was one of the neighbours. People are more aware now.

Getting belted round the head by my parents

Interesting to read similar stories to mine. Lived in the country 'far from the madding crowd' and walked down the road - no path - then across the fields. On the way home had to call in the farm where the cows were being milked to pick up mycan of milk. Then to the bakery for read. Got into trouble for pulling the fresh crust off and eating it! If I was lucky I might get a ride part way home on one of the local farmer's big horses. Then off to the downs to play until bedtime. Can't imagine any child doing that now.

I walked to primary school every day on my own. I started school at Easter because my birthday was in April. In the famous severe winter of 1947 I was 6 and came home at lunchtime with a note from my teacher telling my mum not to send me back in the afternoon in case I got lost in a snow drift. My mother was furious and gave me a penny to go on the bus but I still had to walk home at 3 o'clock. Now schools close if there is much snow.