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Bad language

(52 Posts)
Bopeep14 Tue 12-Mar-19 11:22:34

Why do people feel using bad language is ok in todays society. Today i asked workers politely to move their van from outside my house which was parked on the pavement right at the side of my car, and against my front window were my grandson was having a nap, no room for people to get past at all. They were putting scaffolding in the back and it was extremely noisy. The abuse i got was unbeliavable, the f word and the p word and was told i was a t**t, and some people have to work for a living not like you lazy cow,they are working on a house five houses up and there was plenty of parking outside this house, no idea why they parked outside my house.

Colverson Sat 16-Mar-19 18:51:29

I know how you feel its so sad.
I use to go to a local meet up group but the person who recently took it over thinks its the greatest thing to Swear loudly and stick her fingers up at everyone when we are in a public place ie a cafe for coffee ,its vile and people look at us as if we are a sad bunch of low life who cant behave as nice adults.Decided to stop going out with them and sad the other lady gave up but I do understand she is now very busy with a new job

Anja Fri 15-Mar-19 07:36:31

There is a clear distinction between using the language aggressively and offensively and using it comprehensively.

The OP suffered verbal abuse and intimidation. That is totally unacceptable.

There is no reason to call expressive language ‘bad’ in other circumstances and where appropriate. Your post made me smile GabbyG how would you rewrite Lady McBeth’s famous ‘Out, damned spot’ quote?

NannyC1 Thu 14-Mar-19 21:48:42

When people are crude and or aggressively swearing I ask them to write it down, and take it home and show it to the partner/spouse or mother.

GabriellaG54 Thu 14-Mar-19 21:15:14

Oddly? enough, I've never heard my friends or their partners swear...ever. Not even a 'damn'.

GabriellaG54 Thu 14-Mar-19 21:11:30

A few glezga/glesga kisses wouldn't go amiss.

janeainsworth Thu 14-Mar-19 17:55:10

perhaps responding with a few quotations from Shakespeare is the way to go

blueskies Thu 14-Mar-19 15:44:05

I remember my English teacher sixty years ago giving us examples of alternatives to offensive language. “ you flick of mud off the back hoof of a pack horse.” I think that was Christopher Fry but my memory isn’t so sharp.

BradfordLass72 Thu 14-Mar-19 15:33:44

It's not called 'bad language' or 'obscene language' for nothing.

Most of us grew up in a society where only the lowest of the low swore as they do now, and even then might not swear in front of a woman.

Mind you, I've heard even the royal family swear like troopers and they are supposed to be the highest of the high - they are even called 'Your royal Highness' smile

Swearing on TV comes from the 'trendy' producers who think they and swearing are cool.

breeze Thu 14-Mar-19 15:06:33

The aggression would've offended me more than the swearing.

I do hate that it's become so everyday though because if it's undervalued what can you say when you're cross confused

So many tv programmes (including reality shows) sprinkle it into everyday language. It should be saved for special occasions as far as I'm concerned.

I was in the car once with my teenage sons when a white van almost killed us all. In shock I shouted 'You effing...erm….erm… nincompoop'. There was a short silence, followed by 'Nincompoop'! and a lot of laughing. I'm just glad I didn't say what first popped into my head smile

Kim19 Thu 14-Mar-19 14:58:43

Yep, I too turn off the TV. Shame really because I think Fleabag is rather cleverly scripted. However, in days of yore (guess that's where I'm living) clever scripts managed to appear without the verbal sensation\aggression. My biggest no-no is when I'm on the college bus at finishing time. Gosh, the lads and lasses use profanities every other word and no whispering. Yowwee, so horrible.

OldGeezer Thu 14-Mar-19 13:49:57

Yes - wander round to the neighbour who is having the work done after the knuckle draggers have retired to their caves/mud & straw huts for the day and have a sympathetic word with them relating to the vile language they are having to put up with.
And construct a very formal letter to the neanderthals' employer relating to their behaviour - ideally sent 'to be signed for'.
Finally, a word with the local police regarding the intimidating and objectionable behaviour of these individuals, with luck someone will come round and 'have a word' - don't forget you are probably not alone, there's a good chance other people have had reason to complain - the more complaints, the greater the likelihood that the police will wish to intervene.

Barmeyoldbat Thu 14-Mar-19 13:48:06

Parking on the pavement is against the law, take a photo and contact the highways dept to start with. Also contact their boss and put it all on social media saying what a load of foul mouth louts they are and their work is probably of the same standard. Shame you haven't got two cars and you could have completely blocked them.

Horatia Thu 14-Mar-19 13:39:56

I accidently stood on tar that was drying even though no signs were around. A many stood screaming you f---ing bitch over and over as I hurried away as best I could. I reported him to his boss who said he would speak to him. Don't think he'd bawl abuse at a man somehow.

Nvella Thu 14-Mar-19 13:16:55

Swearing doesn’t bother me at all but aggression does and people seem to be so quick to get into a fight in every situation now.

grannyrebel99 Thu 14-Mar-19 12:45:28

The lovely film A Star is Born was ruined for me with "fucking" in nearly every sentence. There's just no need for it and as a previous GNer said it just shows a lack of vocabulary.

MTDancer Thu 14-Mar-19 12:12:27

Growing up I rarely heard swearing and I do not swear very ofter, and always in private. I was taught it was unacceptable to swear where women could hear it.
I never heard my dad swear but he did so in all male company.
It really makes me cringe and we often stop watching a tv programme because of bad language.
We owned a pub in south Yorkshire and we managed to stop the locals swearing by giving them non-swear words to express themselves. We had big, strapping scaffolds saying inebriated instead of pi***d. We gained a lot more custom too!

Chino Thu 14-Mar-19 11:58:36

I loathe the bad language that seems so commonplace nowadays encouraged of course by tv programmes

adaunas Thu 14-Mar-19 11:28:34

Sorry you had to put up with that. Moving the van would have required extra effort so that’s a no. Since you were polite and they showed they were not, try and let it go.
Re the swearing in TV, my DH comments if I let out even a mild swear word, but happily watches programmes where the F word is the norm and got annoyed when I turned it off and said, “I know you don’t like that language!”

maxdecatt Thu 14-Mar-19 11:24:56

When visiting the USA my wife was helping the hostess prepare lunch. The hostess said. "Now this salad needs a good tossing." With that she turned to my wife. "Honey, is Max a good tosser?" My wife looked at me and said. "Well, that is a matter of opinion, why not ask him?" With that we started lauging. The Americans were mystified and asked us what it meant to English people. When told the meaning of what she had asked about me they were all stunned at first, the women were very embarassed and the men howled with laughter.

Nanny41 Thu 14-Mar-19 11:23:26

Dont tolerate the bad language aimed at you, report it to their firm.Bad language seems to be an every day thing unfortunately, especially the F word, where does it all come from, "Bloody Hell" seems so mild these days,I dont think it is even used now.

Margs Thu 14-Mar-19 11:07:55

If you had been a man making this request to them I bet they would have complied, no problem - but a woman is seen as a fair game easy target.

That's the way these sub-species cavemen types think and talk.

A formal complaint to either their employer or even the police. They've asked for it.

Rowantree Thu 14-Mar-19 11:07:46

BoPeep14 how unreasonable of you to dislike being sworn at. Consider it an honour....(not).
Must have been very upsetting indeed for you. It would be for anyone. No need at all to get abusive and use bullying language to you when you were making a perfectly reasonable request. I do hope you complain firmly and please let us know the response. Bang outa order!
That said....personally I don't object to some swearing in everyday parlance as long as it's not in an abusive context. Also I hate the word c**t used as a term of abuse as that feels mysogynistic. I swear quite a bit at home but restrict it in company, depending on who I'm with - and always with DGC.

What you were subjected to was horrible, offensive, rude, abusive and wrong and there should most definitely be Repercussions. Good luck!

gillybob Thu 14-Mar-19 11:03:55

That reminds me of my dad kircubbin2000 who never swears but often uses the word tosser or says they don’t give a toss shock I know he means it as in “thrown away” but it does make people turn around when he says it in public . I would love to tell him but daren’t.

kircubbin2000 Thu 14-Mar-19 10:53:13

My quite prim friend has started using the word twat to refer to silly people. Should I tell her the meaning? I was quite shocked the first time she said It!

Aepgirl Thu 14-Mar-19 10:47:01

That’s not just bad language, but bordering on intimidation. If you feel threatened in any way (verbally or ‘mentally’ you should speak to the police about it.