its all in the jeans

Mini Moon....was happily agreeing with your post until your last sentence - "no size 16 for me" OMG, do you consider size 16 to be horrendous? There is no hope for us!

The genes definitely play a big part. Doing genealogy for years and looking at old photos i know there are fat ladies under the crinolines.
Queen Victoria asked her adviser how she could get thinner.
Only eat when you are hungry came the reply. But I'm always hungry said she.
Access to food must be a factor too. Dogs get fat too if they are overfed and horses.
I lost 2 stone at weight watchers once but having achieved my goal much clapping I didn't want to stay on a boring diet. Guess what? It's all gone back on

After the fruit figures I just had to add my two cents. My DM is an apple shape with great legs, but my genes came from my Dad's DM. His mom had 4 sisters and they all had hourglass figures as do I, but every one of us has an hour and a half worth sand in our hourglasses. That's a good family joke for us.

I was pleased when magazines started talking about "apple" shapes or figures. I'm not a pear, or an hourglass......just an apple

I have read somewhere that starvation diets cause the metabolism to kick into some kind of preservation mode. Maybe you are 'underdoing' the eating?
Kim my thoughts too.

I am another who struggles with her weight and always have to be strict with what i eat.No home baking anymore except on special occasions as it is just pointless to have a lovely cake or scones in the kitchen and have to deny yourself. Plus since having issues with my back i am now also struggling to stand really upright as well which makes me look even fatter and more frumpy. There is no pleasure in clothes shopping anymore as nothing ever looks right and anyone who hasn't had these struggles is so lucky.

I reckon I eat about a third of what I ate when I was in my 20's and yet I'm three times as heavy!

When I was a young woman I ate cereal for breakfast with full fat milk, then possibly a mars bar on the way to work, then maybe a cake mid morning. The company I worked for provided a free lunch so that was usually pie and chips, followed by a pudding. Then in the evening I would cook another dinner - perhaps chops, peas and new potatoes for my then husband and myself. I was about a size 10, but I did walk to work and back, which was a good three quarters of an hour walk - all up hill on the way back.

Now I am immense. I don't eat breakfast because I find it makes me feel hungry in the afternoon if I do. I have something like tuna or ham salad for lunch. I've given up yogurts in a bid to try and kick-start my weight loss. Then I eat nothing until tea time when we have a spaghetti bolognase or similar. Any meat I have is less than 5% fat and I rarely eat any kind of ready meal. Even if we have a take away I will opt for a 'healthy' option and do things like take most of the batter of the fish. I have recently started using a smaller plate for my portions because I'm still gaining weight! I do eat chocolate, but not every night, maybe 2-3 times a week. I can't exercise because I'm too fat and asthmatic.

I know people judge me, but I honestly don't know how I got like this. I used to be so fit and slim, but now I hate going out because of how I look.

Poppyred, based on the fact that I know nothing but got lucky, I have read somewhere that starvation diets cause the metabolism to kick into some kind of preservation mode. Maybe you are 'underdoing' the eating? And, I humbly add, what would I know. Just sharing.

Poppyred,are you my twin?

I am constantly watching what I eat, often restricting certain things, aiming for smaller portions, low carb, counting calories, slimming world etc., and trying hard to do at least 10,000 walking steps a day (not pottering about steps) and being active most of the day, yet I'm still 3 stone over what I should be.

Its the yo yo dieting that does for us all.

Each decade takes me further away from the ideal me. I cant see an end to it. I shall battle till my dying day. And this is what makes me angry about fat shamming. The stranger has no idea of knowing where that fat person is on that journey or why. That woman, eating the crisps in public could be having a long awaited treat for loosing several stone. The one who struggles to walk up hill may be on medication that has weight gain as a side effect. More likely its a person who daily worries and has mental battles over every mouthful of food. Not every fat person got there by shovelling doughnuts and chocolate into their mouths every waking moment.

Good for you Kim19. I eat 2 very small meals a day, very low carb and very healthy and do a daily walk of nearly 5 miles and still struggle to maintain my current weight never mind trying to lose weight.

My body is in starvation mode from years of dieting which has got me absolutely nowhere!

Poppy red, nothing smug here. Just huge gratitude that a regime worked for me at long last. The benefits are quite amazing.

It has to be metabolism. I have always been a skinny no matter what I eat. Both my parents were skinny.

I look exactly like the females in my dad's family, short, heavy and busty.

The study suggests that just 6% of the population have a gene that tells them when to stop eating and so curbs the amount of food they eat. I once worked with someone who could eat half a bar of chocolate, then either throw the rest away or save it till later. My colleagues and I were awestruck at this. May she had this gene.

I also work with someone who, if she feels she is putting on weight, will not eat until the weight has gone back to normal. That may be several days to a week.

Others seem to eat everything in sight all day but then spend every moment of leisure at the gym, pounding the pavements or spinning class

I think if we scratch the surface, there are lots of eating habits that can not be healthy but as the individual looks OK, we don't comment. Yet catch a chubby person with a bag of crisps in public and they may as well be clubbing baby seals.

Yes I agree it is all down to genes. My sister and I both struggle to keep our weight down on a daily basis. Anyone who says “Eat less, move more” ...Well I just want to smack their smug faces! ??

Terrible what child birth and menopause can do... I find to lose weight I have to have one normal meal a day and that is around 6pm the other meal is a big mug of coffee for breakfast around 10am and one piece of fruit for lunch around 2pm.. with lots of green tea all day to stave of hunger pangs...

No but the ones that were overweight to start with might survive longer.

I’ve been searching for an excuse for years and maybe my genes are the issue but then maybe it’s simply I put too much fuel in and burn too little off? My husband is quite possibly one of the fortunate 6% and unfortunately I have eaten to keep up with him, hence obesity. I’m sitting by a swimming pool at the moment and observing a big family who’ve not stopped eating and drinking since they arrived a couple of hours ago. They are all colossal and it may well be their genes but surely it also has something to do with the vast quantity of food they are consuming?

I agree to an extent but I can also tell you from.experience there are no overweight people in war torn countries

I always been fat. My father , paternal grandmother and maternal great aunt all were fat as older adults.
Mother had an amazing figure just stunning for the majority of her life . My maternal grandmother was always of slender build
Dad died at 80 due to a super bug he caught in hospital. Had all his mental faculties.
Mum died a dreadful death due to dementia
Mum and I used to say ' i got dad's fat hopefully dad's brain "
Fat relatives , dad, paternal grandmother and maternal great aunt did not have any form of dementia and all died in the 80s
Slender relatives mother and maternal grandmother both died of dementia

Quite agree Petunia “fat shaming” makes me angry too! I don’t comment on anyone’s life style unless it impacts on their children or me! Or leads to anti social behaviour why do people feel they have a right to comment and judge over weight people ?

Apparently, the population of the UK was at its healthiest during WW2 - because of the shortage of sugar! I think that genetics does play a part - in my family that's a problem with regulating blood sugar, leading to both weight problems and type 2 diabetes. If I eat sugar, I get a huge insulin spike, which leads to feeling weak and hungry and eat more, and put on weight, and so on. I know that I've felt a lot better since I've given up sugar and refined carbs (the weight has dropped off). I eat much more fat now (which keeps me full) and fibre, and hardly any carbs - my GP was horrified until she tested me after a year of this eating to find normal BP and cholesterol. We are all different and need to find what works for us as individuals.

I`m probably what would be termed morbidly obese. When I married 56 years ago, I was 8st 3lbs. I put weight on after each baby, so by the time I had number 5 I weighed 10st.13lbs, and felt enormous. How I wish I was 10st 13lbs now! I weigh almost 18st, but don`t over eat, I just don`t get around too well, so can`t exercise.

Don't forget the skinny Minnies who just don't eat very much.
That was me once - alas no longer! - I just had a small appetite and wasn't mad keen on sweet things, but people,often assumed I could eat loads and not put an ounce on.
Just not the case at all.

That is cruel Daisyboots in more ways than one. Sending healing hugs and
Medications can cause weight gain and loss.
My DH has been having cancer treatment and at first he lost 4stone. He quite liked being skinny but truly he looked sick. Now he's on a different drug which is reversing the cancer to some extent and his appetite is back and his weight with ìt.
I'm sure you are right Lilyflower and it is hard to do.