I have become invisible

tinaf1

whywhywhy

I definitely feel invisible around certain people and I never used to. Sometimes I feel invisible on this site.

Glad I’m not the only one whywhywhy

Why do you both feel invisible on this site?

Height doesn’t matter. Hair, clothes, makeup (I don’t mean a plastered-on face full) do. And a big smile.

We live in a society seemingly increasingly geared up to younger people. With an ageing population it’s surprising really. BUt I think it doesn’t help with this feel of being invisible. If you don’t like it Sparkling, perhaps try to work out why exactly things changed at 70. (Let me know as I’m 70 this year!). Could you make further changes now? Even small ones might help. Taking a holiday, joining a group, even contributing to online conversations, all may help to increase your sense of mattering. Can you find just one thing you’re passionate about? Can you meet up with a friend more, or relate to family more? Before you dismiss all of this, think carefully. It’s only us that can change things for us, if this makes sense. Good luck.

What!

I am under 5ft tall, late 80s- watch chance do I have!!?

Sorry but not not

I’m 71 still work part time have plenty of friends ad activities and a loving family. I’m very lucky I know not I’ve always been friendly and I never feel invisible

I’ve been feeling the same lately completely invisible. Text messages that I get from my grand kids just don’t come anymore. It’s sad.

It is very difficult to respond to everyone on the GM thread, there is so much going on. It is not personal. Some posters don't respond for fear of missing someone out.

I have been on the the GM thread for about ten years, but have only recently noticed you posting, why, why, why.

I have only seen you there once or twice. Why don’t you persevere? They seem very friendly.

I’m not a newcomer on the Good Morning thread.

I’m definitely invisible .

Grandmafrench

It's often quite hard not to feel invisible when out and about. It often seems - especially in the south of England - that there is no time for anything now , not even a greeting and a smile. Not important any more. So, after many years of living abroad (where older people do count!) I am tempted to behave a little disgracefully now and then. In England I respond and greet people and make eye contact, I never "grunt" and I always smile. It never worries me that a lot of stressed people might think "nutter". Some day we will all be old and if a very old person speaks to me I NEVER walk past and ignore them : what if mine is the only conversation that person has during the whole day? I will speak to the older cashiers in Tesco who question as to why I am buying so many boxes of Earl Grey Tea and then how do I like living in the sunshine. I don't care if her chatting to me holds up the queue - every single person needs human contact sometimes, we are not robots! Probably heading towards the 'purple coat and red hat' age now, so I don't care, but I welcome a conversation with anyone however young, however old, however short of time I am. We all deserve that. No little child will get a sour-faced response from me when they ask my name or my age and embarrass their Mum. I'm happy to entertain small kids in the Building Society queue whilst their Mothers play with their 'phones....oblivious. Invisibles can strike back! We all need to slow down and start caring and not make anyone feel invisible, ever. Do one small kind thing every day and see how are lives are enriched by that.

I absolutely love your post.. there is in fact a Buddhist practise of speaking to someone and really seeing them, each day..

I don’t understand what you mean by being ignored on here. Not every post needs a reply. I think you posted on the Good Morning thread yesterday or today? I don’t post there but usually read it. It may take a few appearances there before you’re really noticed but when posters realise there’s a newcomer I have noticed they are welcoming.

I make every effort with my appearance. Go out of my way to speak to people etc. This thread was started years ago and nothing has changed. I still get ignored by certain people on here as well. I keep on trying but I’m blooming well invisible at times. 🤗❤️🤗❤️🤗❤️🤗

I have never felt invisible. I do, however, encounter plenty of women who make no effort at all with their appearance who probably consider themselves invisible.

We live in a village and I have never felt invisible, I am 70 this year and when I walk into the village there are very few occasions when I don't stop and have a chat with at least a couple of people , they vary in age from teenagers to people in their nineties. I always say Good morning etc to anyone I see which is often is the start of a conversation, I think it helps as my children all went to the village school and I ran the pre school so I do know a lot of people ,I think you have to make a bit of an effort to engage with people .

I would quite like to be invisible, but can't help myself and talk to all and sundry! It drives DH mad!

Our Parish Priest described me as ebullient, I think he meant to say loud! 😂

There's pros and cons. The time I feel invisible is when I can see men are no longer sussing me out - ie as a woman. That hasn't happened for some years now. The plus side of that is I don't get the occasional obscene gesture (ie referring to the size of my bust - as I'm not exactly flat-chested).

The other plus side is that in my current area I now live in I've been told by woman after woman after woman that men in this area expect to have a woman with more to offer than they have (eg higher level of looks/more financial security/etc). I didn't believe this the first time a woman here told me that - and then a 2nd woman did and a 3rd woman did and so on. They're right too!!!! I'm starting to lose count of how many times I see a woman here who is reasonable-looking and owns her own house and is faithful to the man and the man she's with is awful-looking and doesn't own his own house and is playing around. It's clear here that there are a noticeable number of men expecting to get more than they give. Thinking now of a female friend who owns her own house and he (the live-in man) was supposed to be helping her refurbish it (in lieu of rent) and it landed up with him and a load of old tat of his living in her house, whilst she lives in a caravan in her own garden and puts up with him having "a bit on the side". This is not untypical for what I've noticed here.

Blow that for a lark imo and I wouldnt "trade down" so they can "trade up" - and so I'm not bothered that men per se find me invisible these days.

When my uncle died at (I think) 44, I couldn't understand people saying he was "so young". I thought he was old and had already "had a life".

As a teenager I had a sort-of pact with a male friend that if we were both single at 35 we'd live together to provide "friendship in our old age"
😱🤣

Really, what was I thinking!
I'm sure we would all be invisible to teenager me!

whywhywhy

I definitely feel invisible around certain people and I never used to. Sometimes I feel invisible on this site.

Glad I’m not the only one whywhywhy

I don’t feel invisible but maybe that’s because I engage with people of all ages. I look up when I’m out and about and smile whenever I can.
I actually felt more invisible when I was younger due to low self-esteem.

Babs03 happens a lot in Spain (narrow pavements). I too used to accommodate large groups and often step into the road if it was a quiet street. Then I had a lightbulb moment …. I just stop still! They walk around me every time. Job done.

A 5 year old thread resurrected?
Oh well, I suppose the subject is still relevant today …. 😁

Smile and say hello when the opportunity arises, create the opportunity