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(10 Posts)
Bkanche Tue 26-May-20 03:24:19

Husband and I are 70 s with medical conditions. We live in a beautiful beach community.
Our SON and DIL want to come visit with grandchildren. We told them they must quarantine for 14, then they can come and stay as long as they like. DIL decided last night that she wanted to hang out with friends. So she took my 8 year old granddaughter and went off . They practiced no social distancing, no masks, hugged, drank and ate. I told Son today that I was upset by this because it was risky behavior and just delays our seeing them and our grandchildren. Well that went over well. DIL is angry, calling me controlling and judgemental! She says I am causing huge problems in their marriage and they “ will do what they want to do, when they want to do it!” Help!! Am I wrong?

12Michael Tue 26-May-20 06:18:40

It sounds they are not concern , but risk getting the virus like many who ignore the rules .
The Government are trying to Discipline people into it , but they are also setting a bad example.
When you see photographers bunching in a mass , until a 2nd wave happens which it could shortly , and tighter sanctions with a higher death rate could happen .

Willow500 Tue 26-May-20 06:21:19

No you are not wrong - your DIL behaved irresponsibly putting her own family at risk. Tell them you are now unable to have them visit which if you're in the UK they shouldn't be contemplating at the moment anyway.

Furret Tue 26-May-20 06:39:56

Don’t even argue with them. Just explain quietly and sadly to your son and leave it there. Pity you have ‘one of those‘ DiLs.

Hetty58 Tue 26-May-20 06:56:15

Bkanche, just pass on the message (through your son) that you are not 'controlling and judgemental' - just terrified of catching the virus and dying. I wouldn't trust them to isolate now, so any visits are off the agenda until next year.

Davidhs Tue 26-May-20 10:11:11

I can’t imagine why DIL thinks not visiting you is causing marriage problems, on the other hand her visiting friends and not social distancing is exactly what you don’t want them to be doing.
Stick to your guns.

harrigran Tue 26-May-20 11:59:17

No you are not wrong, your DIL is in the wrong.
When the rules were relaxed a little it wasn't because the virus had gone away it just meant that the NHS could cope with the number of new cases.
Your DIL sounds like an uncaring individual, let her stew.

FlexibleFriend Tue 26-May-20 13:01:07

I'd say neither are wrong you just have different priorities. You are looking forward to seeing them and want to protect yourselves. I'd say you're not a priority for your Dil and she wants to see her friends. No point fretting about it.

silverlining48 Tue 26-May-20 14:27:51

Sounds like the poster is in the USA, not sure, but if so there will be different rules

Bkanche Tue 26-May-20 15:41:48

Thank you all! I am just sick over how this got turned around making me the bad MIL! Yes, i am in the US. We are allowed out but with masks and social distancing.