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Husband with memory problems

(2 Posts)
Jeannie59 Sun 31-May-20 11:17:20

Hi GNs
My husband is 15 years older than me, He is 80 in September and I am 64
I have been noticing how forgetful he is getting and I have to repeat most conversations
I am in the situation where my both my daughters live on the U.S and Oz
So I feel on my own sometimes, especially as we are in lockdown
The doctor did the memory test and he had a brain scan before lockdown, the doctor rang with results the other day, and said he is Borderline.
Have any GNS had experienced this and what does border line mean?
She did say, they found nothing un to ward on the scan, and has referred him to the memory clinic, but this will be on hold atm
I also went away to OZ for a month in November to visit my DD and family, I was there for a month and he had a fall out with his Stepdaughter, who was from his 1st marriage, he hadn't seen her for 40 years and she found him last year.
I was sceptical from the start, but it made him happy
Then she sent me a message in oz, to say he had come on to her, and suggested they live together, as she told him she was going to split up with her husband
He told her about our sex life and how it was non existent, and said I was having an affair, which I am not
I must admit, I haven't loved my husband for a atleast 12 years or more and stay with him, through guilt as he is elderly now
My youngest DD doesn't like him and never has.
I was with her when I got the terrible messages from his stepdaughter in Oz.
Dd went ballistic and wants nothing more to do with him
My eldest DD is in San Diego and says he is an elderly scared man
I am so sorry about this being long winded, but I am just so unhappy

sodapop Sun 31-May-20 12:20:18

I can understand how you feel Jeannie59 you didn't say what border line your husband was on..
I tend to agree with your daughter who said he was a scared elderly man. If he has the onset of some form of dementia then he is probably losing his filters and will just say what comes into his head. It's very hard I know not to take things personally.
I would be a little concerned about his step daughter arriving on the scene after all this time. It would be prudent to take care of your finances and ensure you have to be consulted about money changing hands and that you have equity in your house.