The Argy Bargy Bar...the lease has been secured!

Just been down to Madame Pom Pom’s Boutique ( down by the gasworks) she’s running me up a chic little number to wear tomorrow night, bright orange with black arrows on it.
Thor has decorated the bar for Prison Nite and is dressed as a warder ( think Mr Mackay from Porridge) ....I think he looks quite sexy but Tattoo Terence was in earlier and laughed at Thor, said he looked like a ‘bent screw’! Thor leaped over the bar and he and Tel had a real set to.I shouted ‘leave it Thor, he ain’t worth it!’ ( have always wanted to yell that.)

Doodle...that sounds familiar? I know! It’s Cathy from Wuthering Heights.

AGA it’s cold out here ? please let me in. I promise I’ll be good ??.

The llamas have eaten all the poteen porridge so I have brewed another batch. I have locked Doodle out so she can't add anything.
The cells are ready for lemon to do some man handling.

Huh why am I not surprised lemon

I want to come as Elvis Presley in Jailhouse rock ah ha.?

We could have quite a few cells put into the cellar, there are people who would happily pay a tenner to be manhandled into one and locked up for an hour. I volunteer to do the manhandling.?

I will come and visit you and bring a cake with a trowel in it so you can tunnel out.

Hmmmm porridge eh? Tell you what, let’s have Prison Nite on Friday, I can wear something chic with arrows on it.
You could be a ball and chain Doodle ?

I think I’ll have a pint or two of porridge then please AGA

No poteen this week but porridge available for all (poteen flavoured.) May give a similar result.

I’m not surprised they have watery butts if you keep feeding them poteen. They need some solid food. I think I will prepare some nice stodgy porridge. I’ll just pour all these oats into their trough so they can eat it whi..............er AGA did you say you were using their trough for something

Thor took the Argy vat up to Lemongrove Hall with the aid of the llamas. I need to get brewing up there soon.
I am using the llamas trough to brew this week's poteen. I have rinsed it out in the stinky brook so it will be fine. Don't worry Doodle I have given them the water butt for their drinks but they do prefer poteen as you know and tbh they do have watery butts.

I’d better get a good nights sleep then........anyone seen my marigolds ?

The very same Doodle and he doesn’t have a tooth in his head, even false ones.
Never mind, onwards and upwards, I must leave a note for AGA to get brewing again first thing Monday morning.
I want to see all you scrubbers in by 10 a.m too ......I know it’s early and all that, but have you seen the state of the bar?
There’s still a pile of musketeers under each table.

No! ?. Not Gummy Joseppi, the toothless wonder. I hope he didn’t leave his false teeth embedded anywhere. ?

Oh if only it had been Gnasher.....much worse than that though I’m afraid! It was that toothless old guy from the tattoo parlour.

Don’t worry lemon Gnasher won’t kiss and tell ??

Those cocktails were killers! Have just got my sight back....
Aaaaaarrrrrrrgh! Is that who I spent the night with?!

Oh I’m glad to see everyone is back to normal. I don’t think I’ll be doing any more spells for a while. Is there a handsome fireman down there who can catch me when I come down from the roof AGA? He’d better catch me first because if lemon goes first she will squash him ?

Got on the wrong train so didn't make it to Hogwarts but looks like a good time was had by all.
Lemon and Doodle are still sleeping it off on the roof with the llamas.
Lemonopened one eye and told me to get brewing and Doodle was muttering in her sleep "take me George". I don't know where she wants to go.

Norbert is homesick and crying into the poteen.
At least there's no fire, but he cuts a sorry figure sobbing in the cellar.
He can either join Moaning Myrtle in the girls's lavs, where she is maudlin in the extreme, or can you magic him back to Romania? Forget the quarantine on arrival - that's their problem......

Ok folks I’ve found another spell to bring everyone back.
Alakazam alakazo ? how’s that. ????. Oo er!

Can't sing but I have brought Black Magic chocs. Will pass them round.

Well, if nobody else wants a go ( since nobody seems to be here) I’ll have another go on karaoke.....
Abbra, Abbra, Cadabbra, Am goin’ to reach out an’ grab yer....

But it's going well for some, by the sound of it. Moaning Myrtle in the girls' lavs is the happiest anyone has ever heard her, complete with hiccups snd giggling. Did no one warn her about the poteen?