Keeping things for best, I’ve turned into my mother! ?

If l said anything to my mother about her not wearing something new she had bought she would say she had put it away so that she always had something new to wear.
When she died l found a beautiful wool coat in the "new look" style that must have been early fifties.. An invoice for £100 was in the pocket dated 1949. There was a pill box hat, gloves and a small black initialed leather handbag . Some amazing black suede heeled shoes must have completed the ensemble. She had been a Wren officer during the war and pictures showed she had been very stylish. Yet in the later years after my father's death sshe did not take any interest in her appearance and took delight in cruel comments to my sister and l about our. To my horror l find myself living in the same fleece, stretchy trousers and walking shoes, wellies or crocs depending on the season . My husband says l must fight it and l am trying!

Oops! My last message was for Candelle! Not very good with replying to messages! Sorry!

I have exactly the same husband!I despair when I see him with his good t shirts on, he buys blue or blue (perhaps 6 at a time), Friends husbands are smart when we go out (not at the moment of course), mine is wearing the same clothes he had on to sweep the garage! ? he will never change!

A couple of weeks ago I was looking at my pyjamas and thinking they were tatty and well worn and I needed to replace ASAP ! I hated the thought of buying at full price as I usually bought them in the sales ! While looking for something else discovered 3 pairs ( for hospital just in case ) 3 pair ( for visiting son and family ) 3 pair ( I had got on holiday ) and that’s not counting the silky lacy ones I thought I could wear on holiday but decided if there was a fire in the hotel there was no way I could be seen in them !!!!

We too recently cleared out my MiL's house only to find numerous new items and gifts - never worn, never used. I am at present moving house and I too was a culprit of this. Some things I will never wear or use so I have made hefty donations to various charities who were all delighted with my offerings. Hopefully they will earn some money for their good causes. Why do we do this? I can understand that some things are unwanted gifts but why do we keep things we don't love. After spending weeks sorting out my hoards I am never going to keep what I don't love.

It was Notspaghetti, but since writing it I realised that DGS and I have made a point of getting 'dressed' when we go for our walks. Making a thing of dressing nicely during the very long summer.
We noticed that it was older people who were 'dressing' and there is one elderly gentleman who is often out on his bike and he doffs his hat when he passes.
DGS school gate is a real mixed bag, the Italian embassy parents look like they came off the catwalk in Milan, and thats just the drivers.!!!!!!!
It is a local school so a real mixed bag.

My parents married in 1934 and after my Mother died in 1981 we found several boxes of coffee spoons, tea knives and desert knives and forks. The wedding gift cards were in the boxes and clearly none of the items had ever been used. I inherited them and guess what - they are still carefully housed in my wall unit and I have never used any of them either!! So am I just a sentimentalist or a carbon copy of my Mother?

Felice that is so sad.
?

I don’t keep things for best. I was buying silver teaspoons as a silver wedding gift for my sister (they were what she wanted). The assistant polished them as she put them in their velvet lined box but told me to tell my sister that she must use them every day and enjoy them. She had recently cleared her mother’s house after her death and found years worth of unused presents.
I do have ‘best’ China but it’s not expensive, just kept so that we have a whole set when visitors come. I also use lovely smellies especially perfume , tho I like to have special scented soaps in my undies drawer.

Think the trouble at the moment is that during lockdown we’re not going anywhere si I just slop around in my oldest jeans and ancient tops! Seems no point in wearing nice clothes!

I try to think about 'What if this were the last meal you were to eat/last time you went out for a meal/last time you entertained? and then act accordingly. I've spent years keeping things for 'best' but now I use the best china, wear the 'special' clothes, and push the boat out for dinner, drinks etc. when anyone comes. When we married, in the late sixties, we were given a set of heavy silver cutlery. I didn't use it at first. but after about a year it seemed senseless to leave it in a drawer, and we have used it every day since. It's still pristine, and I know all my children have their respective 'eye' on it!

I never save things “for best” after losing two friends way too young and realising that tomorrow isn’t promised. I use and wear all my purchases right away. Xx

Ten years ago I was given a bottle of a very expensive vodka. Still cannot bring myself to open it as I know once I do it will be gone! It’s not as if I can’t afford to replace it, I can. Marydoll, I’m opening it tonight and will drink it out of my Sunday best Waterford Crystal tumbler, also something I will no longer keep for best!

I recently came across a lovely Jo Malone candle. I realised I had been given it six years ago and must have thought it was “too nice to use”. We’ve been using it ever since to fragrance my furlough. Life is too short, enjoy the good things while you can.

When my mother inherited her mother's royal Copenhagen china - dinner plates, soup plates, dessert plates, coffee and tea service she decided we would use it every day, as my sister and I were teenagers by then, so the risk of it getting broken was less than when we were small.

Now DH and I are using it, or a small portion of it, as every day china.

DH has two good suits and I have a long and a short formal dress in moth balls, other than that we don't have best wear.

I have kept my wedding dress though, though as we don't move in the circles that attend papal funerals, I am not likely ever to need it.

Yes, it seems we all have a habit of putting off the best things for later, but why if we live today? a year ago, I probably came to the conclusion that we need to use the best things and not abandon them, because in 90% of cases we forget about them or they become unsuitable or unnecessary. therefore, you need to use joys now or give unnecessary things to others, with bright thoughts)

A couple of years ago I realised I was walking into charity shops seeing things I liked, looking at them and suddenly remembering why I passed them to the charity shop. I have almost rebought things. In an attempt to stop this, the clothes I really like but don't need (unless they have a great deal of good wear left and are very saleable in which case they do get donated) get cut up and turned into rag rugs. I have numerous rag rugs now, not particularly useful but they take up less space and sometimes the kids want one. As for best? Never really go anywhere these days but I do have one good summer outfit and one good winter outfit just so I don't embarrass anyone. The dog dosn't care what I look like

Just like my mother I used to keep things for best but then had my epiphany moment and thought- why keep for best, enjoy the moment. So I do....always

I grew up in the 1940s and 50s and the motto I learned from my mother was "keep it for Sunday best". This would have been a sensible and necessary motto during the war but I wish it hadn't become so ingrained in me. All my life I've put away "nice" things for special occasions instead of enjoying them at the time - clothes, handbags, bars of nice soap, nice stationery, notebooks etc.

It's taken me 77 years and a pandemic to realise that there is no point in waiting for a "special occasion". Similarly, with making bucket lists. I wish I'd spent less time making lists and more time just getting on and doing things. So, all you lovely gransnetters, "think on" (as my mother would have said).

We had to spend most of the summer in last year's dresses, as new clothes had to be kept for our week's holiday in August.
But we did have to wear something new, if only socks, at Whitsun, for luck.

When Country Casuals was going into administration ( 5 /6 years ago , I know they've come back in a smaller, not so good way ) I had a real spend up - buying jumpers that were £89 /£99 for £20/25 and tops and trousers at M&S prices.
I did go mad buying stacks but put them away ' for best' . Of course they didn't get worn , and I gained weight .
At the first lockdown I went on a strict diet and have lost a good few stone. I got my bargains out of the attic and have turned into a dressed up gransnetter now !

I'm also quite new to Gransnet and really enjoyed this post. My mother would put away the presents I bought her and never use them. She had boxes and trunks in the attic with good clothes but went around in shabby old jumpers and skirts and one black coat.Her sister was the opposite , wore all her good stuff, was always smart and never went out without a hat.
I do keep clothes for going out, and since we're not, I look at them and feel sad, but with cats in the house you just can't wear your best, it wouldn't last a week after a good kneading with kitty paws !

Have to admit I wear just about anything for any occasion!! DH, on the other hand, will see a shirt he fancies, buy it then not wear it until it's well out of fashion. He's still got clothes, and wears them, he had before we married (50 years ago).

Paddyanne.. that’s so sad ?..I think we all could learn from that tragic story.. my mother did the same things with shoes she bought me..by the time I was allowed wear them they didn’t fit..

My mum and gran had a special cupboard for unused Christmas gifts. Many were regifted. I think living through the war made them like this. I tend to keep clothes for best and wear scruffy in the house.