Nasty greetings cards. I was shocked

At the moment, when there is so much unhappiness around, we need more kindness. For me, Christmas is not about helping firms like Amazon and commercial greetings card companies to make even more money. Charity cards can be funny, or cute, or religious, or festive, and are available on-line. But not usually rude!

I always have a selection of cards that I buy online from a company called Whistlefish. I first found them when we went to Chelsea flowers show a few years ago. I buy enough to qualify for free post once a year and I always have something suitable in cupboard.

I can have a laugh and I'm certainly no prude, but I do agree that some of the cards online are just horrible and offensive. I've seen ones with "You f-ing c--t" on them, and similar. I suppose there must be a market for them or they wouldn't exist. But I wouldn't like to be given one and I can't really see the humour in bad language like that.

I've stopped sending cards at xmas, instead I give to the salvation army for the homeless.Even for my husband I just get last year's out. He can't go shopping as he's disabled and the price you pay on Amazon is a rip off.

Our local hospice has lovely cards - quite a few by local artists - and they have sold more this year already than they did last year. Bice to let people know you are thinking of them.

Why not make your own? Homemade cards are always unique and you can tailor them to the recipient. Items to make cards are so much cheaper than they once were and what an absorbing, productive hobby!

I think you'd have to know your audience pretty well to send some of the cards out there or you could cause great offence. I was certainly quite taken aback by some of the "humour" when I was looking last week for a friend. Some of the cards had me laughing out loud but many were just unkind. However, young people seem to take that in their stride...I think they call it "Bants!"
My two boys have a competition with cards about which one of them is my favourite. It always makes me chuckle especially as the older son was hopeless at sending cards until his younger brother got so good at it! My daughter would never send a card that had words in it which she didn't feel. She wouldn't ever say out loud that she loved me or appreciated me in any way so her cards have always been very special as they often express what she can't. Sadly, she has decided to stop sending them as she is concerned about the earth's resources.

I was given a card for my fiftieth and it said ‘why aren’t you dead yet’ I’ve never forgotten it and found it really shocking and hurtful. I am no way prudish but that was just nasty

I got most of mine from Cards for Good Causes (google it and you'll get it) which normally runs pop-up shops all over the place. They have stacks of cards from all sorts of different charities and do a good online service. The cards arrived promptly and were just as described. The only problem I found was that not all the cards displayed what the greeting inside was, and I do not want anything other than Best Wishes for Christmas and the New Year (or near offer), not Christmas Blessings, or Peace and Joy at Christmas. That's just my personal taste, but there is something for everyone!

boodymum67, I would love to be able to make my own cards, but am totally devoid of anything resembling artistic talent!

About 2 years ago when I was in Hallmark, I noticed just how crude and vulgar greetings cards were, at least in that shop. I did mention this to the sales woman but she merely shrugged, said she hadn't noticed.

Personally, I think all this talk about bodily functions and swearing even on greetings cards is a symptom of the drain into which we're sinking.

We used to be able to laugh until we were cramped at comedy. We were able to understand the difference between non-offensive and offensive and to rise above it. We used to be able to communicate without shouting. I never heard a swear word until I was in my 20s, despite being part of a crowd of boys and just one other female friend. We had crazy times, full of laughter. We misbehaved but never damaged anyone or property. We could understand irony.

The reason? Discipline and self-discipline were all part of family and school life.

Nobody would have thought today's greetings cards in the least bit funny.

I am by no means old by the way!

That's because we're now a nation of slobs to a large degree.

Brother and I send each other a comical card inside with the usual brother/sister one but they're never crude, just comical.

I'm old-fashioned with my cards as I do like the sparkly ones with scenes and buy such boxes of them from the card factory.

Pinkjj27:
I was horrified to hear about the poor woman who took her own life after receiving a nasty card. However mean she was, she would probably have turned into a nicer person if anyone in the office had tried to find out why she behaved in such a way and tried to be kind to her, but sending a cruel card certainly wasn't the way to make her a nicer person and whoever sent that card will have it on their consciences for the rest of their life and will be haunted by their actions..
She must have had a terrible time in her own life to have turned out to be a mean person as nobody is born mean. Trying to understand why she was as she was would have been the best way, not sending her a vile card like that.
Why would you want to upset anyone by sending them a nasty card?

Funny old world when everything we say is policed, we tread on eggshells when we write on here, get slated if we try to be amusing, seem to offend at the drop of a hat and yet it seems it’s okay to send people crude or offensive ‘greeting’ cards.

I see what you mean Lizbethann about this and you have to really know your audience well. BIL sent a birthday card to his mum which said, 'Wow, 80 years old and not dead yet!' which as you imagine did not go down well. He is university educated and thinks he's jolly clever but is very insensitive to the feelings of others (thin-skinned himself of course) and his poor mum was really upset. I'm not surprised you felt the same way Minxie there's humour and there's just plain nasty.
Poor MIL showed the card to everyone and told them how horrified she was. Whether she also told her un-favourite son I'm not sure but he was most certainly in the dog-house.

I do not understand why some people would consider sending nasty cards. After all, Christmas is supposed to be a festival, and for Christians a time of celebration of the birth of Christ. Some years ago, I was the recipient of an inappropriate Christmas card which I won't describe here as my post would be edited out! I was extremely embarrassed and upset, and fortunately managed to destroy it before DH or our children saw it! DH would have been making blistering phone calls to my workplace as it came from a colleague, admittedly of very limited intelligence, in worktime. However, it was a horrible experience for me.

On a more pleasant note, many of my friends - and relatives - appreciate receiving Jacqui Lawson eCards, so they will get those with the possibility of one of her Advent Calendars as well. And, yes, I have made a donation to a charity to allow for the lack of cost to me!
When I visited our local garden centre recently, I found they had charity cards on sale which actually had Nativity scenes on them which is quite a rarity these days. Others on my card list will get one of those. The greeting inside is "Christmas wishes" which, for most people I know, is far more appropriate than "Merry" or "Happy" Christmas this year.

(That reminds me, sadly, I need yet more sympathy cards. I used my last two last week, which makes an average of around 2 per month this year. Normally I would choose them individually, but at the moment I like to have a stock of cards for all occasions.)

and yes Lizbethan I agree many go too far to be funny

To be honest I have an open mind on greeting cards.

Huguenot, very appropriate name for the times we’re living in and yes I largely agree with your post

We have an 'arty' shop in Folkestone that has a sign warning you before entering. Some are funny, some disgusting and I can't see any humour in many of them. I personally dislike so called funny cards ..as my husband discovered, he only did it the once!

Phoebes

I didn’t send the card.
She was mean and defensive but I always rose above it and never ever responded to her in the same way. I always assumed she was bitter and hurt.
I had sent her a card that year and mine was nice but it was the nasty one that clearly had an impact.
I don’t know if the card was a factor in her ending her life but I do know she never came back to work after dropping that card to the floor.

We never did know who send the card (through the external post) but rumour had it that there was a big group of staff behind it and many thought it was funny even after she was gone. These were academics who should have know better.

Just before lockdown, I allowed myself to go to town and bought my Xmas cards from Oxfam. Their cards are usually made of recycled paper and, of course helps a charity. To my mind Christmas (apart from the religious story) is about helping others.

I often have a chuckle at some of the cards, when I’m browsing. Some of them are very funny, if a bit rude, but I agree that others are really offensive. I think that you need to know someone really well before sending such a card, and be sure that you won’t upset them. Personally, I would rather not take the risk.
As for Moonpig cards, they are convenient, but not very good quality. They are quite expensive, for what they are, but it’s nice to be able to personalise them.
Be warned that postal services are much slower right now, especially abroad. I ordered a Moonpig card for a friend in Western Australia, knowing that they are sent from Sydney. It was delivered five weeks later! Anything posted to Australia from the U.K. is taking ages to arrive. I posted my Christmas cards off three weeks ago, and hope that they arrive in time. It’s becoming ridiculously expensive to post abroad though. I’m tempted to send Ecards instead, but they don’t seem the same, somehow - not even the lovely Jacqui Lawson animated ones

Moggycuddler

I can have a laugh and I'm certainly no prude, but I do agree that some of the cards online are just horrible and offensive. I've seen ones with "You f-ing c--t" on them, and similar. I suppose there must be a market for them or they wouldn't exist. But I wouldn't like to be given one and I can't really see the humour in bad language like that.

Blooming heck! I thought the one I saw, "Now you are an Old Fart", was bad enough!

Art is anything you can get away with - Andy Wahole... maybe that's the quote.