Age Gap Relationships

Older

My father was 17 years old.
All good until my mother reached late forties. Then the age gap seemed an abyss. And unfortunately they divorced

My DH God rest his soul was 17 years older than me. We met when I was 37 and he was 54. Age was never an issue and he treated me like a princess. I used to pull his leg when people mistook me for his daughter and he took it quite well as he was always full of fun.
I think it bothered him more than it did me because one day he decided to dye his hair, he bought a jet black hair dye and instantly regretted it because thereafter he earned himself the nickname Alvin Stardust. ? Needless to say he didn’t repeat that and decided to stay with the gray hair lol.
I loved his gray hair. He was a very handsome man and looked a lot like Charles Bronson. He’s been gone 15 years now and there’s no one else for me ❤️

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

My husband is 15 months older than I, so for 3 months he is 2 years older...as I enjoy reminding him... We married at 21 and 12 years later I developed a crush on a 20 year old young man who clearly enjoyed spending time with me at a club where I was a barmaid.... It was only when he kissed me one night that I realised that he was just like my husband when I met him.....

Same age. Though I have friends whose husbands are a lot older and one considerably older. One relationship works one doesn't.
When young age mattered now it is like minds. If your husband is considerably older I think you know what the consequences might be and accept them if and when they happen,BUT would I have thought like that at 20 I don't think so. Depends on how mature you are and what you are looking for when you marry.

My husband is nine years younger than me . Never had any problems . He was 28 when we met. I had 2 children and been out of a horrible marriage . He’s been a fantastic husband and father and we still love each other very much. The only slight problem is a financial one . We cannot retire together. My DH will have ti carry on working .

It is funny isn’t it.. I also have this built in bias that a partner should be older and taller. Is it something to do with “man” being the provider/protector etc?
My ex was taller (I’m only 5’ 2” so not difficult) and I dated a guy a couple of years ago who was just a couple of inches taller than me and it felt very odd. However I have a customer at work who is absolutely no taller than me but has such a fantastic sense of humour that I always wish he were single ?

16 years, it’s has its issues more so now than when we were younger

My husband is 16 years older than me, we've had a perfect 25 year marriage and I couldn't be happier. With a bad marriage behind us both we really do appreciate and care for each other.

I had grave doubts about Barbara Windsor and her ‘toyboy’ husband, but they seemed to be very happy. He stayed with her for better, for worse, in sickness and in health.
My DH was 27 when I met him, but I thought that he was joking. He certainly didn’t look, or act it. I was 21. Our marriage had its ups and downs, but we stayed together for 51 years. He was almost 80 when he died, 5 years ago.

There were 20yrs between my husband and I, however we had 2 lovely children, and 39 yrs happily married until I lost him to cancer 9 yrs ago. My current partner is also older but only by 8 yrs, and to my chagrin he’s much fitter than me and no one ever believes he’s in his 70s! ?

Late husband was 13 years older than me, reasonably equally matched on the brains front. Sometimes, it was an issue - particularly around popular culture. And when his physical, and then mental, health declined, over the last 14 years of our 31 year relationship, it became very difficult.

Current partner is 2 years older, and it's much better. Like LauraNorder, I'm the brainier one this time - but I find I quite like it that way!

I'm 9 months older than my husband. He's my toy boy ?.
We've been together for 45 years .....it was a problem when we met though. He was 14 and I was 15 and I got teased by a girl in my class for dating 'a baby' ??

I do think an enormous age gap can be difficult as time goes by. What doesn't matter when both are still relatively young - say 23 and 43 - can become a huge gulf when one is 63 and one is 83. Having said that, it should concern only the couple themselves as long as they are over 18 and have thought it through. Many people with big age gaps are very happy. I have been married twice and my husbands were/are 5 years older and 3 years older.

Two of my children have married partners younger than them. My son hit puberty early and was physically a "man" at the age of 12 whilst his wife is a much younger soul than her years. There are only 3 years between them but he seems older than her. My daughter married a man who was 5 years younger than her. She has always been emotionally immature and he seemed older than his years but actually, I think part of their problems are that he is more immature than we realised. I think he is now regretting settling down early.
My sister went for someone 15 years younger than her...it was a disaster in every sense including his sexuality.
My husband is 5 years older than me and I tease him for being an old man. His first wife was 3 years older than me so he is always threatening to trade me in for a younger model like he did once before. In reality, we are both too set in our ways to each other to bother with anybody else, younger or older.

My second hubby is seven years older than me, it’s worked well. As we get older sometimes I feel like he is in a different age bracket but mostly it’s just grumpy old man syndrome and I tend to be a bit younger in outlook, love him to bits and wouldn’t change him. When I was 18 I had an affair with a man of 30 (I’ve always been attracted to older men), I shall never forget the sheer passion - it could never have been a long term relationship it was mainly physical but I’m glad to have had that experience in my life.

DH is nearly ten years older than me, bee together thirty years, still works for us!

I Watched a documentary not that long ago about older woman - I am talking here about grannies ages approx 75 years upwards who were very interested in what we term as a ‘toy boy’. I just could not and cannot get my head around those grannies getting all excited about having a toy boy, how they would all dress up quite seductively and be all over each other!??. Sorry but not for me. I would much rather a cup of tea, a good book and a doughnut! ???

But age gaps for me personally say 10 / 15 years - I don’t see any problems at all. I know one of my aunts many years ago married a man 30 years older - he was married before. I was told at first the marriage was fine and he treated her like a princess but sadly as they aged it did become a problem within their marriage.

But then I look at my best friend who sadly met some guy same age as herself who made her life a complete nightmare and social services had to help her escape who by then she had a little baby also to care for. Then some 2 years later she met this wonderful man - 15 years older then her. He eventually won her trust. He absolutely adored her and treated her like a princess. They were married for over 30 years. Sadly he died some 3 years ago but my friend’s marriage throughout was very successful and she was so very happy. She has some wonderful memories to treasure.

First husband was 5 years older, second one is five years younger than me. I tell him that if he doesn’t behave I will change him for a newer model!

My ex was five and a half years younger than me. When we got together one of his friends accused him of bath chair snatching! He then realised that was a bit rude and spent the rest of the evening apologising! I found it funny and I'm still friends with him and his wife long since divorcing my ex.

My in-laws were very unhappy about the age difference and MiL once suggested my ex find someone 'younger and slimmer'! I don't know if she knows that he told me. They started dropping hints about babies soon after the wedding and I only gained their approval after producing the longed for grandchildren. They were clearly worried that I was too old at 31!

Eventually the ex traded me in for a younger model but she was fatter than me! MiL doesn't approve of her at all!

My 32year old daughter is currently dating a 50 year old man, although we are trying to be happy for her, we can't help but be concerned for later years when she will still be relatively young and him not so much!

It very much depends on the people I think and how much they are prepared to compromise!
My ex was younger than me - only by a year , but after just a couple of years, I realised he had really only married me as a mother substitute! While I was the one making the decisions, it was fine but when I was the one that needed support, that was when he decided it was ok to go back into teenager mode and stay out until the early hours again!
Whatever the age difference , up or down, if people want a marriage to work , have similar interests or are ready and happy to let their OH do things on their own, I think it can work.

My husband is 17 years younger. We have been together 26 years. Never noticed the age gap, I'm 70, he's 53. We are on the same wavelength. I'm still fit. Good relationship. I had 2 children when we met, he decided he didn't want his own, as he had a difficult childhood, but he's been stepdad to mine and is "grandad" to the 6 grandchildren. It all depends on the people themselves.

Can't see a problem with an age gap, an energy and zest for life gap is much more significant. My 2nd husband is 22 years younger than the first and 6 years younger than I am. I had a very happy relationship with someone 13 years my junior in between brought together by a love of tennis. TBH though I couldn't imagine being married to my DH now as he's not weathered well. I am clearly very shallow!