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Did children once have more freedom?

(108 Posts)
trisher Wed 10-Mar-21 11:39:56

I can remember being left in the house for short periods from when I was about 7 and for longer periods when my brother (3 years older ) was about 11. We did get up to some risky things, science experiments with the gas supply!! We usually found some of our Christmas Presents, and once when bouncing on the settee my brother knocked himself out for a few seconds by hitting the light fitting with his head. (fortunately it wasn't broken).
My grandmother and her siblings always spent a summer holiday at the beach. Their mother took them there, settled them into the rented house and then went home. She had to look after their father. They were sent a hamper of food for each day.
Were you ever left? did you explore on your own?

Gelisajams Wed 10-Mar-21 13:53:04

I was an only child and used to wander by myself for miles until I got to open country. I was only warned of the dangers of the canal - not to mistake the dense reeds for solid ground.
I also used to be given the bus fare to go and visit my grandma. 3 buses, roads to cross and what seemed like a long walk at either end. I was 7! I thought my mother was overprotective.

ElaineI Wed 10-Mar-21 13:52:36

Used to play in the street from about 5 - as stated before much quieter. Few people had cars. Walked to school alone from 6/7. Used to mind my brother and cousin after school when I was 12 (the boys were 6) and babysat for parent's friends from 13. We also would pack jeely pieces and disappear up to the woods and hills (Pentland) all day coming home for tea. Nowadays my heart stands still when DGS2 is a few yards away on his scooter (almost 3). DGS1 is 7 and has just begun to go to the park close to his house with a friend and go round for the friend - both mums watch from a distance. They don't have nearby shops and school is 1.4 miles away so will be a while before they go alone to those places. I remember shadowing DD1 on her first trip into Edinburgh on the bus with friends. She was about 12. She was mortified!!!

trisher Wed 10-Mar-21 13:49:06

You don't say how old the children were on the summer beach holiday by themselves.
muse My grandmother was one of 13 children and one of the oldest. There were several girls before the 3 boys.We have a couple of photographs and the girls look to be 11 or 12, certainly not much older as my gran went into service when she was 13 just before WW1 started. She said all the children were left except the smallest baby who went home with GGmother. They were there about a month and their parents sometimes went at weekends.

Redhead56 Wed 10-Mar-21 13:45:42

Where I still live it was farm land which was mostly eventually built on. My parents chucked us out the door with jam butties and water. We wandered for miles picking fruit and anything else we could get.

When our dad was in work on shifts and mum went to work we were left on our own. Our twin sisters were supposed to watch us but were busy hanging around the Cavern club.

We were playing cowboys and Indians with my brothers wooden fort. We copied a film we watched on tv and decided to make a fire in the fort we very nearly set fire to the house.

My children were never out of my sight and very picky about friends and only went to their houses but I walked them there. My two now parents themselves say I wrapped them in cotton wool if I had my time over again I still would .

Kim19 Wed 10-Mar-21 13:44:41

Yes I was 'let loose' tenish in the morning with strict instructions to be home by five. I usually had some sort of picnic and went with pals either to the beach, open air swimming pool, indoor pool or park. Was taught to seek out a policeman if ever in any sort of difficulty. Happily never had to resort to that.

Amberone Wed 10-Mar-21 13:36:57

I definitely don't envy children today - for all the toys and electronics they possess they don't seem as happy or adventurous in general than we were.

We played out near our houses well into the dark, usually a crowd of us from the nearby houses playing hide and seek and tag. At one point (we moved a lot) we had fields and woods backing onto our houses where gypsies used to camp, and spent most of our free time there playing with the gypsy children. When we lived in front of some sand dunes we spent a lot of our time playing in a burnt out wreck of a car - sometimes I remember it became a ship heading out to see. I can vividly remember my brother erecting a flagpole through the windscreen (garden rake and bit of cloth) and standing on the bonnet, sword help high (broom stick) pointing the way to the sea.

annodomini Wed 10-Mar-21 13:32:26

There was less traffic which allowed us to play games in the street without risking our lives. A big field behind our house and an unused area of my granny's garden gave us scope to run wild and play cowboys and Indians, climb trees and pick blackberries. And there was the beach, five minutes away - within shouting distance for the louder mums - not mine! I walked to school until I was 11 when I was allowed to cycle. My GC have always walked to school. Now the older teenagers are motorised - motor bike and moped. A few of us came back from Guides by bus as far as the chip shop where we each spent 4d on a bag of chips.

Susan56 Wed 10-Mar-21 13:32:10

When we were children our family had a holiday house in Anglesey.We spent all time we weren’t in school there.

We would meet up with our friends in the morning and wouldn’t go home until we heard my mother blowing a whistle in the evening!We had a small boat and would go to see and row to the next bay?we would also clamber over the rocks to meet our friends when the tide was in!We were in and out of the sea all day.

I took my family there a couple of years ago and was shocked to realise how far we roamed.My girls couldn’t believe it.I used to collect them and take them everywhere.

At home in Liverpool, my friends and I would pack a picnic and take off on our bikes for hours.

Yes, I definitely think we had a lot more freedom.

EllanVannin Wed 10-Mar-21 13:28:29

Jane43 , same with my two daughters and 2 stepchildren in the early 60's when they all played on the shore near to where we lived. They enjoyed themselves too and I never had to worry about the dangers of the sea as they were all sensible about it and kept together. Buckets and spades and they were off. The usual paste sandwiches and a few coppers for a bottle of pop from the local fancy goods shop.

I did drill into them not to talk to anyone and thankfully I didn't have any scares. I was like a record every day during their school holidays when more people would be around.

I think I spent most of my time hoovering up sand and washing it out of their clothes and emptying their shoes grin We had shells everywhere too of all shapes.

The freedom and independence was so good for them. I certainly can't imagine even sending a child to the corner shop now. Such a horrible world we live in, in comparison.

The youngest of mine is 57.

JenniferEccles Wed 10-Mar-21 13:25:23

Oh we most certainly did, and even my children now in their thirties and forties had masses of freedom compared with children today.

Like all of us of our generation, my school holidays were spent outside playing or going for bike rides. Our mums didn’t have a clue where we were but that’s how things were - a wonderful childhood full of freedom.

My own children had a similar time but I did want to know roughly where they were going and they were always told what time to get home.

My son in particular got into some scrapes including falling in the river once but they survived and were happy healthy children who undoubtedly benefited from the freedom.

I find it quite sad that children today are the first generation to not have the chance of a proper childhood.

Artaylar Wed 10-Mar-21 13:04:51

We definately had more freedom.

I grew up in the 60's. We were one of the first families to move into a council estate still undergoing construction when I was 8. We played out all day on our own in the local park and during (light) evenings and weekends we had much fun building never ending 'dens' in the parts of the estate that were still being built.

From 10 years old I was at home all day while mum and dad were at work - mum started work at 7.30am. During school time I would get myself ready, make my own breakfast and then walk to and from school. During the school holidays our flat would be full of kids from the estate. I was always getting into trouble over this with mum threatening to lock me out of the flat after she left for work at 7am - fortunately that never happened.

From aged around 14 to 16 my best friend and I went on the bus to a different youth club in our town every night, walking several miles home in the dark on the many occasions we missed the last bus.

Casdon Wed 10-Mar-21 13:04:47

No, not here, I live in a rural area and my children and their friends had very similar childhoods to my own. They both went on picnics, bike rides, swimming in the river (very shallow), sledging, tree climbing etc. with their friends from the age of about 10. They had mobile phones, but I didn’t worry about them as they were in groups. The worst thing that happened was when the local vicar called my son and his friends heathens when they knocked on his door at Halloween and gave them an impromptu sermon. I think you have to give them some responsibility, it helps them develop their coping skills.

grandmajet Wed 10-Mar-21 13:04:36

I remember being told never to accept sweets from strangers, but I had no idea why. I thought maybe strangers’ sweets were not very good ones!

Jane43 Wed 10-Mar-21 12:57:21

Grammaretto

Yes far more freedom. I walked to school from age 5 with my big sister and other children joined us but there were more people on the pavements weren't there because there were fewer cars. So it's catch 22.
Nowadays most DC get driven to school so the roads are busier and more dangerous and there are fewer families walking so you have stranger danger.

I must have had danger instilled in me though because I can remember being offered a lift, in the pouring rain by a woman with DC in her car but I refused to get in.. I will have been about 8 or 9.
I called the police once when my DS said he had been offered a lift by a stranger on his way home from football practice. He will have been 11 or 12 but small

I also have a vivid memory of being offered a lift by a man who told me he knew my father. I was about 8 and used to call for a friend who lived a short distance away and we would walk to school together. One day she was ill so I walked to school on my own, it was at dinner time because we went home for dinner and I was walking back to school when the car drew up. I got in the car but almost immediately I began to feel scared. He stopped at the school gates and asked if I wanted to go a ride with him. I said no and thankfully was able to open the car door and get out. My father was a policeman and when I told him he said I must never do that again. He managed to instill the danger in me and I never forgot the incident and realise I was very fortunate that it wasn’t worse.

sodapop Wed 10-Mar-21 12:55:18

I don't remember being left alone at home until I was around 12/13 but did have a lot more freedom out of doors. In the summer holidays we could be out all day with a packed lunch.
I lived on the coast and we spent a lot of time in the amusements and on the beach. I was not supposed to hang around the amusements as my mother thought the people working there were unsavoury.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Wed 10-Mar-21 12:53:10

I think we were less fearful of the bad stuff. We were left alone in the house sometimes with warnings not to play with matches and the like.
When we went out to play at the rec we were told not to accept lifts or sweeties from strangers and to come back before tea time. I couldn't say whether Mum ever worried about us in our absence - we simply didn't think to ask. Simpler times, perhaps.

Charleygirl5 Wed 10-Mar-21 12:51:47

Out early in the morning with my friends- I am not sure what was done about lunch but I returned home in the evening when I was hungry. We lived in the country- a few houses- my parents both worked full time.

The dog and I were sometimes left on our own in the evenings- no TV in those days. I used to amuse myself by playing with the coal fire! My parents would have had a fit if they had known. I also went to school on the bus at a very early age.

During daylight hours we would go to the local woods and have a picnic there.

We also picked raspberries for cash but my mother said it cost her more in supplying food and drink than whatever I ever earned.

The only thing I was not allowed to do was ride my bike to the local town 2 miles away because I had no idea of the Highway Code. I rode locally only.

None of this would be allowed to happen now.

Jane43 Wed 10-Mar-21 12:46:54

My experiences were similar to yours EllenVannin and I too have precious memories and so did my two friends who sadly have both now passed away. Definitely we had more freedom but I was never left alone until I was 16 and then I had two friends staying with me in the house. From the age of ten, so from 1953, in the school holidays and at weekends I was allowed to spend all day with my two friends and we share some fabulous memories of simple pleasures such as bike rides, picnics, going to the record store and asking to listen to records in a booth, playing lots of different games, fetching shopping for our parents and taking neighbours’ babies for a walk. I never remember saying ‘I’m bored’. My two sons, who are now 54 and 52 also had more freedom than today’s children. They were allowed to play outside with neighbours’ children and make their own way to and from school from the age of 10 and 8 although there was a school bus when they were at middle school. They also enjoyed bike rides with friends, playing tennis at the local tennis courts and generally spending time with friends. I also never heard ‘I’m bored’ from either of them.

Grammaretto Wed 10-Mar-21 12:46:06

Yes far more freedom. I walked to school from age 5 with my big sister and other children joined us but there were more people on the pavements weren't there because there were fewer cars. So it's catch 22.
Nowadays most DC get driven to school so the roads are busier and more dangerous and there are fewer families walking so you have stranger danger.

I must have had danger instilled in me though because I can remember being offered a lift, in the pouring rain by a woman with DC in her car but I refused to get in.. I will have been about 8 or 9.
I called the police once when my DS said he had been offered a lift by a stranger on his way home from football practice. He will have been 11 or 12 but small

timetogo2016 Wed 10-Mar-21 12:43:57

Me and my sister did exactly the same tanith.
We had a great time and never were afraid.
I feel sad for youngsters today,they wouldn`t feel as safe as we did.

EllanVannin Wed 10-Mar-21 12:30:06

Without a doubt we had more freedom.
I'd say from 10 onwards a handful of us would walk the local country lanes to a fishing pond and we'd be gone all day until teatime though we didn't have a clue of the time until one kid would ask a passer-by. This was the 50's. There was no fear of anything or anybody in those days and we had real fun and adventures. Idyllic is the only way to describe it. So happy. If only those times came back sad

A bottle of melted jelly cubes with cold water added and meat paste sandwiches----which I did the carrying of grin.

Grannybags Wed 10-Mar-21 12:24:04

I was never left alone in the house but was allowed out to play all day. I'd disappear for hours, only going home when I was hungry

I went to Primary School on the bus on my own

Oldwoman70 Wed 10-Mar-21 12:19:21

We used to walk to nearby countryside and spend the day there, only going home as it was getting dark. As someone said there was no thoughts about perverts, although we all looked out for each other and we did have it drummed into us that we shouldn't speak to strangers.

Walking to school alone was commonplace. I do recall walking to school one day and a car stopped and the driver offered me a lift - it was a friend of my father. I refused and worried all day that my father would think I had been rude to his friend for refusing the lift. (In fact he praised me and said I had done the right thing.)

I think we grew up to be much more independent than children are today - although I appreciate we do hear more about perverts than we used to so it is unsurprising parents want to keep their children safe.

grandmajet Wed 10-Mar-21 12:12:31

I lived in norbury, south London, in the fifties, and as a child from about the age of 7 would take myself the mile to school with a group of friends from our street. I remember being sent home early one day because there was a very thick smog. There was no way of contacting parents then, we just set off into the yellow swirly fog and found our way home!

muse Wed 10-Mar-21 12:12:20

Never left alone in the house until I was 16 but did go out exploring a lot. We went out as a family a huge amount including evenings. I went out on my bike with friends and took a picnic. Lucky enough to live in very rural part of Derbyshire.

You don't say how old the children were on the summer beach holiday by themselves.