Following the dinner party from hell thread........

We had (pre Covid) a dinner system that includes myself and other half and two widowed friends. We take it in turns to host and cook the main meal, the other two bring starter and dessert. It worked well for us - can't wait to get back to it!

Wow I had brilliant dinner parties back in the eighties. We would have 8 people at a time. I used to love all the preparation for it and it would take all day but I enjoyed it. We would all dress up, the men in dinner suites and the girls in evening dresses just for fun. My husband used to work for a brewery and get the wines and spirits. I remember pouring 20 year old port just in the gravy. The evening would go on and I remember one night people leaving as the milkman delivered the milk. Do I miss those nights NO THANKS I don’t have the energy.

There are a group of us, eight in all who used to live close to each other, and we’ve taken turns to cook a meal for everyone for about 25 years. It would be every few months, and always New Year’s Eve. The meals have got progressively more simple, and although it’s great to see everyone, I don’t look forward to my turn. Putting any sort of meal on the table for eight is quite hard work, and then there’s the clearing up! Perhaps we will think about eating out when we’re allowed, but we’re quite a rowdy lot!

No not interested in dinner parties

In the 70s seemed to be the done thing. Hated them, not only all the cooking but having to get children to bed before the event. Strangely I never had anyone who was vegan, vegetarian, lactose, dairy or gluten intolerant for a meal. Couldn't cope now having to consider all those aspects when cooking.Of course everyone was on a weight reducing diet, nothing changed there.

We have dinner parties. We plan them about 6 to 8 weeks ahead and those we invite we would usually suggest dressing up . Down not have to be black tie but formal. It gives us all an opportunity to do something out of the ordinary. Try it. You will be surprised to find out how much enthusiasm there is for such an occasion.
Best wishes

Dinner parties are for people with staff to do the cooking and serving..I like a long lunch in the garden with Friends/Family and simple good food and lots of booze...

We do, or rather did (thanks, Covid).

Call it 'having people over for a meal', or anything you like but cooking for friends is lovely.

We are in a circle of four couples and it's only a couple of times a year when it's our turn, although I am sure that no one is counting. Poor health means that I have not done quite as many as I should but I am sure that no one is counting. I hope not, anyway....

When being a guest, it is lovely to go to a friend's home and relax, knowing there will be yummy food and wine, great conversation and a warm ambience. It's not quite the same, eating out together (remember that?!) in a restaurant.

Yes, there is much work for the 'hostess' (which sounds much grander than it is as she is also the cleaner, shopper, sous chef, chef and waiter) but it's worthwhile to see friends relax and enjoy your food and the whole evening.

We are all pushing on now but hope to carry on, once Covid has been tamed although it must be only a matter of time before we lose members and I wonder what will happen to us then..... I am sure it will be more difficult but the lure of wanting to please and see your friends have a lovely relaxing evening remains.

We have not yet had an 'Abigail's Party' evening!

Have not had a pot scourer or teabag turn up in our food, either - yet.

I did have one occasion where all six guests turned up and while sitting having pre-supper drinks and nibbles, the door bell rang. On the door step were guests seven and eight. I thought they were unable to join us but must have been wrong. There was a mad dash into the dining room to lay up for ten, find extra dining chairs and to eke out the food. I only did that once and was scarred for life!

Lucca's dinner parties sound good fun!

Yes,, then barbacues in the Summer, love entertaining.Pre covid we had a constant stream of visitors because we moved to Yorkshire.So yes always cooking for people, l enjoy it!

I started cooking for between 10 to 16 people as a student (mostly the lads). I charged the cost of the ingredients, including my own plate and added on a small amount extra as wages. My now DH started coming shopping with me to help carry it all back, which was very much part of our courtship. He then became my sous-chef...
After we became a couple we regularly hosted big gatherings and I always loved cooking for everyone; nothing fancy, usually big vats of curries or chilli, lasagnes etc. Birthdays, New Year's Eves, any chance to have over other people, rooms of (sometimes) sleeping babies and children upstairs, sometimes fancy dress, sometimes with silly games, always with generous amounts of alcohol, were such fun. As we grew older they became less frequent and maybe included more BBQs in the garden, along with more requests to bring either a salad or pudding. I cannot wait to be able to invite friends and family to our new home and start cooking up a huge pot or two of something delicious, to fill the house and garden. I guess some people get a big sense of satisfaction from feeding others, I know I do. As shoulders and wrists become less strong to lift big pots I might have to downsize numbers? At the moment though,being able to shovel tiny pots of home made
mush into my one year-old GCs sounds like a magical wish will come true when we can do it again.

Dinner parties were never my thing . I hated the thought of them.

Friends are unable to drive at night so we were in the process of moving from an annual New Year party to smaller summer parties at lunch and tea time in the garden and conservatory, when covid came. We then, when allowed to, met in the garden; guests brought their own food, whilst I supplied hot drinks and occasionally the guests supplied beer.

Well, not at the moment, obviously! But yes. Two other couples are perfect.

I'm on my own, so don't have them or be invited to any, all my friends are in couples so never ask me. Suppose I'd be the odd one out and they maybe think I would feel uncomfortable. We seem to do lunches out instead, just us 'girls'. Roll on the days when we can do that again.

I had to do them in the 60s and 70s, because everyone we knew did. I didn’t question it, and at the time I didn’t even realise that I hated it. All that fuss about cooking......really not my cup of tea. I don’t like staying up late either.

I remember being very grateful to Jilly Cooper, who said “Don’t play social ping-pong” - that is, don’t feel you always have to reciprocate. After that, I didn’t feel so obliged to do what everyone else did.

When we were able to have people in our house, a group of what was 4 couples met regularly in each other’s homes for dinner parties. Now there are 2 couples and 2 single ladies (one widowed, and me - divorced) so we singletons share the cooking between us to carry on our dinner parties - Hope we can start again soon.

Friends round for a meal in the kitchen, no starters, just a simple one pot main and a pud. Good company and conversation, lots of laughs. It’s one of the things I’m looking forward to when this Covid malarkey is over.

We like to have friends and family over for meals but don't stand on ceremony. I'd rather serve up a good quality supermarket fish pie than spend ages assembling my own. One friend was rather snooty at first.. "Oh, I always make everything from scratch ... blah blah blah". However, since the last time we met she has become a regular customer of Cook ready meals. (Tee hee )

We tend not to eat out with friends in the evening nowadays as we struggle to hear one another against the background noise. Lunches in pub gardens are very popular though.

When we’re not in the middle of a pandemic we quite often have dinner parties. Very informal, with close friends, a chance to push the boat out, try new recipes and catch up in our busy lives with dear friends. I have learned to make dishes that can be prepared in advance so I don’t spend ages in the kitchen when our friends are here. We are moving house soon so looking forward to having a better space for entertaining.

Used to, haven't recently, but newish partner and I hope to restart entertaining reasonably regularly once the present unpleasantness is over. House move is on the horizon so getting a proper dining room will help.

Am a believer in dining 18th century style, two courses, first mostly savoury, second desserts and cheese, about 6-8 completely different dishes for each one so everyone at the table can find something to eat, and no more cooking for the rest of the week as the family eat up the leftovers. Bit like Christmas but with a more varied menu!

We did have dinner parties with friends but they stopped when we retired. We had friends around for casual drinks occasionally before covid.
We tend to eat casually most of the time now sometimes not in the same room or different times it depends.
However since we married nearly twenty five years ago I have prepared a candlelit dinner with my DH. It's usually once a month although more frequently recently as it's something to look forward too.
I love our dining room with traditional furnishings matching tablecloth and napkins and lots of flowers in vases. Some would say yuk can't be bothered but I like the effort I theme the meal too. The next meal planned is an Indian Thali with small bowls of delectable food sparkling wine and cocktails.

Can't wait to have a few friends round our table again! Don't really call them "Dinner Parties" any more. Always invite friends who know each other and who can relax and have a larf!

What is the difference between having a dinner party and having people round for a meal?

I don’t know, either! We are part of a group of three couples who take it in turns to host meals, every three or four weeks. I’ve missed it so much over the last year. We have such a laugh - great food and conversation, and we’re not usually ordering taxis home before 2am. I actually enjoy our turn - we all make an effort with three or four courses, cheeseboard and chocs and plenty of wine and liqueurs. We don’t have a dining room, so when it’s our turn it’s an intimate affair round the kitchen table. We have other friends round as well, of course, and sometimes go for a full on house party. Going out for a meal’s fun as well, but a different experience altogether. You can’t move around and chat freely at a restaurant.

We used to have dinner parties when the children were little. As they grew we preferred to eat with them. Until recently we met friends for a meal out somewhere.

When we first moved back to England there was a group of 5 couples who were neighbours and we regularly had dinner parties but as someone said it grew to be too competitive so it lapsed.

Well, no-one has answered my question, but the replies seem to show that some people think having friends for a meal is a 'dinner party' and others that calling it a 'dinner party' is 'posh'. Anneeba - like you, I love cooking for friends.
Until his final illness my dad (working class, as it seems to be relevant) would ask friends for lunch: smoked salmon, beef stew, both with nice bread, plenty of cheese & fruit. Not sure if that is a 'dinner party' but they all loved it, and did the washing up before trundling home.

However, this thread has reminded me that I did once go to a very posh dinner party! The lady who threw it was titled, and we were invited because her husband and mine had done some charity work together. She had no staff - it was all cooked by herself, and was delicious - first time I had Coronation Chicken - made to Constance Spry's original recipe, and I realise now a sensible choice. It remains (and I'm sure will ever remain) the only occasion on which the 'ladies retired'. I had only read about this in books, but she was so courteous so that we didn't get taken aback! We were taken to a very comfortable sitting room, overlooking the garden, where she had coffee and brandy waiting for us.
She had gone to a lot of trouble to give us a nice evening, and her lovely manners also conveyed that they wouldn't expect to be invited back (which indeed would have put us under pressure) but was a 'thank you'.