Feel the fear and do it anyway

Sandycat

Rosie1959 - if you are struggling to see properly you do know that the seat can be raised to accommodate your height. I’m sure a Jag will have this facility for you.

Lol yes the seat adjusts but the front bonnet is massive it’s just because I don’t drive it so often
I definitely have to adjust it my DH is 6’ 4’ and has the seat fully back when I get in I have to use the electrics to bring me far enough forward to reach the steering

I think our anxiety has increased because of lockdown. Reading through our collective fears and anxieties, I'm okay with most of the things raised, don't love flying but it's a necessity if I want to travel, driving abroad I break out in a sweat as I have little idea of directions. I have recently joined u3a which has meant attending socially distanced meets with new people and it's turned out just fine. Guess I'm not doing too badly, I don't worry about getting work done, getting the car sorted per se-what I do worry about is how covid safe the places and people are when I have to do these things. I am definitely phobic about covid!

Christmas!!.. So many ways to get it wrong. Absolutely dread it.

As far as driving is concerned, I am ok but not great. It helps to be more detached and not measure our phobias or fear in terms of success or failure but somtimes these fears are simply coping mechanisms. If we were to see the folly of driving around in herds in these tin, polluting boxes, using up precious and scarce resources, at such great speed, it might help us understand our anxiety. It is a mad thing to do.
I do it because it is convenient and I dislike crowded motorways. I am fine in France where the density is much less.
I think it is sensible to feel the fear and do it anyway because otherwise we become isolated in shame but it is important to remember that fear is bred out of loneliness either past, present or a fear of future isolation.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I went to M& S a few weeks ago. I got so upset I came out in tears. Also I loved driving but having driven very little over the past 15 months I don't have the confidence in my driving anymore. I've had a driving licence and been driving since 1963 and hate having lost confidence now.

What an interesting thought.

I am full of anxiety, but hide it extremely well.

A lifetime of practise !! Generally I throw myself into stuff and hope for the best.

Oddly the one thing I can't do it stand up to my elder daughter. She is inclined to push me around verbally ( like peas and carrots on a plate, she says) and I get into such an anxious state that I can't even think straight. It doesn't happen all the time, but when it does it's painful.

Well done to all the folks out there who feel the fear but do it anyway.

I don’t fear the car hand wash, I look forward to it! ? I drive up, get in the queue, turn off the engine, jump out leaving the keys in and pop off to the on site cafe for coffee while the guys take care of the car! ?

Those paying £6/£8 for a hand car wash - do you not worry that these men are likely being exploited. How can anything so labour-intensive be so cheap?

There have been so many reports over the years that such car washes are usually dens of modern day slavery.

A motorway is really just another road, only 3 lanes. And statistically it's the safest road to drive on. But I still don't like them! I hate it when the traffic grinds to a halt and then I start to get panicky. Am OK on A roads as you can turn off them somewhere if necessary.

I have a fear of heights. A few years after i lost my husband my sister persuaded me to go paragliding. I was petrified but once I was on my way I loved it. Mad or not?

Noname

I don’t fear the car hand wash, I look forward to it! ? I drive up, get in the queue, turn off the engine, jump out leaving the keys in and pop off to the on site cafe for coffee while the guys take care of the car! ?

I didn’t ask what you have no anxiety about but thanks , no thanks for making me feel small again.

Riverwalk

Those paying £6/£8 for a hand car wash - do you not worry that these men are likely being exploited. How can anything so labour-intensive be so cheap?

There have been so many reports over the years that such car washes are usually dens of modern day slavery.

No it's the going rate around here and it's their own business so expect they are charging what will get the customers in.
We have our cars fully valeted for £40 again own business and has been doing it for years

Hi Inishowen, try and turn your fear of meeting people, so think ,
“strangers are just friends I haven’t met yet!!” ???

It's been so interesting reading your comments, especially as so many fears are to do with driving.
My overcome fear is driving on the right hand side in Europe with a British car, I'm feeling slightly anxious just thinking about it, even though I'm now in the UK.
I know I get far more anxious as I'm ageing - getting to trains on time, driving DH's car, moving house, and also, as a newbie on GN, I also feel anxious about giving my political opinions for fear of being trolled. Hardly anything used to arouse fear.
30 years ago I read the book, Feel The Fear and Do it Anyway - it's been my mantra since then, because after doing it the feeling of having done it negates the fear of it, at least temporarily.

Going to the dentist, absolute terror. I have to leave in a few minutes for an appointment with mine and would prefer to be dragged there than have to voluntarily go myself.

Tomorrow I am watching my youngest daughter parachute out of an aeroplane. Im far more scared than she is. I've advised her to wear brown trousers!

Dentist, this started with the School Dentist, no anaesthetic just straight in with the drill, that fear has stayed with me all through my life. I've been known to make appointments & cancel them. I do force myself to go now.

Lifts, I've been stuck in one, I won't get into a crowded lift.

Escalators, I can manage going up but not down

Motorways, I've always hated driving on busy motorways, I passed my test in 1973. I do drive on them as it's the only way I can see my Mum s she lives in Yorkshire & I'm in Devon (no motorways except the end of the M5)

I have to face my fears head on, lots of other things cause me anxiety but the worst is having an MRI scan, I've had 3, head only but I'm claustrophobic, my worst nightmare

What are you driving Maw? Our local car hand wash is £10 for our SUV.
I hate the phone. Always have. Wish we’d had email and texts when young. Video calling is fine because I can see the person.
Those answer machines turn me into a mumbling, gibberish speaking wreck!

So good to know it's not just me ! Motorways - hate them ! Hand car wash too and the dentist!!!! Why am I like this ?

DENTIST! I'm terrified, and it's something that I only ever do once a decade or so, and yet I know how ridiculous I am. I have even seen first hand what can happen when you DONT go to the dentist. My son ignored a dental abscess, and the infection moved to his heart, and then became a multi system infection that in turn turned to sepsis. 17 weeks in ICU, 11 weeks in a medical ward, followed by 4 in a rehab centre, with the removal of his spleen, and long term kidney damage.

I should get over it. But despite having an abscess I just can't visit the dentist.

DiscoDancer1975

What are you driving Maw? Our local car hand wash is £10 for our SUV.
I hate the phone. Always have. Wish we’d had email and texts when young. Video calling is fine because I can see the person.
Those answer machines turn me into a mumbling, gibberish speaking wreck!

Wash, full valet, wax etc
A year or so ago it was £15, so £22 while a bit of an increase seems money well enough spent to me.

Hate getting a train on my own, don’t know why. Am Okish if I get on with someone else. Made myself get on the train just before first lockdown and she met me on the platform. Terrified but did it . Now not going out much have only been once on local
train one stop with family so no chance to practice.

Don’t mind driving including the M25 and other motorways as long as I know the route. Get anxious driving where I don’t know not make myself as like driving mostly.

Can do email and order stuff online but am anxious about other computer stuff and hate doing online bank transfers, usually get DD2 to do it

She being daughter meant to say daughter first time sorry

Well it used to be flying l would force myself to do it.But since lockdown will not be a problem ever again.Have decided for me it is not worth the physìcal sickness and fear, l vowed never to do it again.
More recently going into restaurants for a meal. l am constantly doing a risk assessment before l can relax but l am getting there.