Hurtful comment, never forgotten

So much casual cruelty! I’ve been told many times about my footballers legs, but my feet are the only part of my body these days which still look good. Possibly because of boarding school brown lace up shoes when all my other friends were wearing winkle pickers. I’ve often wondered why we humans are so obsessed with what we’re born with. Is it really so important?

My teacher use to shout ‘rusty bun’ across the the classroom, I had red hair & would wear it in a bun.
Another time the school stud asked if I used brasso on my hair, in front of his friends 😩 he went on to ask me out many years later- but gave me great delight to turn him down, said I don’t go for the bald look. I do though as my hubby is bald & very attractive 😊

As long as you are comfortable in your sandals .wear them whoever you want

You and me are the same then .try wearing flat pull on shoes something between sandals and trainers.i am nearly 68 and have flat feet and arches.also bunions.i have never worn ill fitting shoes in my life .but still walk like a flat footed duck so who cares .just be yourself ....words may hurt.but imagine that person naked and laugh at them .if they ask why you laughing .tell them you imagine them naked .or say at least I have feet and not a big mouth..

Mt61

Blinking heck 😩

Quizzer I bet you have the brains?

I did pay £30 a couple of years ago to see a podiatric person in my town
He actually did very little he made some sort of toe separator with some sort of pink plastic stuff (which the dog ended up eating!) Apart from that, he didn’t say anything made me walk up and down a few times, but did suggest some sort of shoes but they were way beyond my price range
When I sit in my back garden, I do wear sandals and I will walk to Tesco’s in them as well but would not go to town in them
Thank you for your interesting and varied comments

Blinking heck 😩

DillytheGardener

I had a similar comment about my hairy arms when I was about 24 (they are fair but lots of hair, thanks dad). I started shaving them and now thankfully have had them lasered off.

Does the laser work on fair hair?

Still devastated by a remark from my less than tactful mother. I was in my thirties, a mother of two little ones, when she was visited by an old childhood friend of mine.
My mother said how lovely she looked and added “of course she was always the pretty one of the two of you”.
It hurt so much then, even if it was true, and hurts still today 40 years on.

Wear sandals Shinamae, get those feet in the fresh air and be proud of all the hard work they have done how many miles have they walked over the years? Put some pretty nail polish on too, when you meet people in the street you look at their faces not there feet no one will notice.

It seems like that mean flippant comment, all those years ago, was a young man showing himself up as immature, thoughtless, and rude. As you were only 15 you took it to heart. I will scroll back and read some of the earlier pages. As you say it’s nice to read comments from those who don’t appear here now for whatever reason.

Can I suggest you get an orthotist or podiatrist to check your feet. Well worth the cost and they can advise what footwear is suitable for you. This stops so many later problems.

I have one foot turning outwards with a bunion too so the toes bump into each other. Rieker boots and sandals are perfect for me as I can get my orthotic insoles into them (fixed with sticky back Velcro in the sandals).

For me one of the decided advantages of being elderly, or old, is that I no longer worry about what I used to perceive as my physical imperfections.

I make sure I am clean, dressed as I find suitable and I wear the shoes or sandals I want to. Make-up or not, as I please.

It is such a relief no longer to look in the mirror and see my too big lower lip and wish it was thinner, to look at my feet and no longer worry that the little toes are squint and my big toes longer than the second and third ones, but just be pleased that they still do their job of carrying me around.

Try if you who have suffered from unkind personal remarks in the past can't look past them and be glad that whatever it is you feel is ugly still works .

He probably meant the scholl sandals!! They made everyone’s feet look awful … still do along with crocs!!! I have feet like hobbits!! But always wear pretty shoes!!

Shinamae - your feet have carried you for many years so nourish them instead of being ashamed. Feet and especially the nails, need to see sunlight and feel the air so find yourself a good podiatrist and keep the skin nourished and the nails in good shape. You might even feel like painting your nails although your podiatrist will probably advise against that but you can buy nail varnish which allows the nails to breathe (this is halal nail vanish and a company called Nailberry sells it I think). Buy some sandals with some arch support - try company called FitFlop - they have a 'wobbleboard' technology that does offer some support for the arch. Good luck - don't let that comment define you - the guy is probably bald, fat and ugly now.

When I was 13 a young lad that I quite fancied called out loudly " oh here comes sparrow legs!"
Since then I have never worn shorts, always wore short skirts with high boots and that looked good. But I hate exposing my legs. I am 73 now

Many years ago sitting in my best friend’s garden she commented I had fat knees was very self conscious for a long while. A friend who met a few years later once asked me why I was still friends with her as she was so bitchy , I’d obviously grown accustomed to her jibes. He thought the reason she picked on me was because she was jealous as most people took to me more than they did her.

I moved to a new area when I was eleven and a girl a year older lived next door. She took me around the neighbourhood (very nice of her) and we bumped into some boys she knew. When she told them my name one of them said “I didn’t realise she was a girl, I thought she was a boy.” I was absolutely mortified and started wearing my mum’s mascara. For the next forty five years I never left the house without some form of makeup. Then during COVID when I could wear a mask I didn’t bother, and now I only wear it a couple of times a week.

Well, I am quite delighted that this thread has been resurrected. I had even forgotten I’d started it. 😭😂
However, there is a bit of sadness because a lot of names that were (particularly back in 21 )we no longer see now for whatever reason and that’s quite sad…😕😕

I have the ugliest foot on the planet! My right foot is hideous (left foot normal, not pretty but more or less normal), I have a mahoosive bunion on my big toe and it’s trying its best to overpower the toe next door. I wear sandals all the time in the summer, if anyone doesn’t like the look of it then it’s just too bad. Buy some pretty sandals and wear them with pride! Your feet are probably just the same as everyone else’s anyway.

Shinamae - and others who've been hurt by cruel words - I feel so sad reading it and yes, quite angry on your behalf. I don't know if you can swear here but what a little t***er! Please imagine him now as a wrinkled old geezer, toothless and potbellied.
My oldest brother once stopped me from entering "most attractive pet with most attractive owner" at a county fair. He said my sister would win it but I didn't stand a chance. She was upset about that which was sweet of her. He grew into a very cruel man by the way.

The only hurtful comment I remember was directed at a drawing I was doing, not me directly. I was about six and had spent ages drawing what I thought was a pretty girl, in what I considered a beautiful dress with frills down to the floor. My grandmother looked at it and said “What an ugly girl”. I was so hurt and I have never forgotten it.

Some of these posts are so sad. I was very lucky and cant remember any unpleasant things said to me. But I can remember saying something very unpleasant to a younger cousin.
I am ashamed.

During covid a friend told me I'd cope better with lockdown because I'm so insular . Never forgotten it , I remember her words every time I see her .

I have very broad fat and flat feet plus bunions, but until today it has never occurred to me that my feet are ugly. Actually, I suppose they are BUT all I care about is finding footwear that fits and is comfortable!! AS for the schoolboy - he was probably at that age when he was rather awkward and didn't know how to make conversation.
Have you tried DB Wider Fit shoes? In this weather I'm wearing their flat mules with a patterned top. Even though I'm only just over 5 feet tall I don't think anyone would think my feet were ugly. And anyway I wouldn't care if they did!!!