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Breastfeeding

(72 Posts)
Newatthis Mon 02-Aug-21 15:22:27

I found this article interesting
www.aol.co.uk/entertainment/laura-whitmore-praised-breastfeeding-daughter-092318157.html
I chose to breastfeed when we had our first child in the early 80's. I was very discreet at all times. I was in my in-laws and every time our child needed feeding every member of the family would go in the kitchen and stay there until I had finished (including my husband!). It was during the period that Prince Andrew was going out with Koo Stark who had made a film which was rather 'risque' which was being aired on TV. Needless to say no one left the living room while watching it! Clearly my in laws found it more embarrassing doing something perfectly natural breast than watching Koo Stark bare all. New mums everywhere should be allowed to chose how they feed their baby, either with formula or breast milk, be able to breastfeed anywhere, provided they are discreet, without discrimination.

JackyB Tue 03-Aug-21 09:54:44

Witzend's story of breastfeeding in church reminds me of DS3's christening. He was born in November and christened on Boxing Day, so the church was quite full and we were in winter coats. The baby started screaming and my MiL told me to give him the breast to calm him!

(I didn't, but mainly because of the thick double-breasted coat I was wearing.)

Aepgirl Tue 03-Aug-21 11:15:04

I breastfed my daughter for 14 months in the late 70s when it was expected to be discreet. When breastfeeding on the beach I found that wearing one of my husband’s shirts back to front kept my modesty and gave my baby an airy slightly darkened area to feed.
My daughter became a breastfeeding counsellor (until the local authority withdrew the funding) and always made the point that women’s breasts were for the benefit of the baby, not for leery men, or for people to dislike. She also said that it was important for both the mother and child to be in a quiet and peaceful place to feed.

grandtanteJE65 Tue 03-Aug-21 11:18:37

I have absolutely no objection to babies being breast - fed in public, but I do object to their nappies being changed in the middle of a café or anywhere else where people are eating!

jaylucy Tue 03-Aug-21 11:41:50

I breastfed my son until he was one. Didn't plan it that way, but my son wouldn't accept a bottle at all, so with advice from my health visitor I went from breast to cup.
My family were quite used to me doing it - I usually had a shawl handy or a top that was fairly covering - it's amazing how I managed to do up the cup on my bra one handed!
Many shops used to have areas that were for feeding mums but these are few and far between now - our last one in my town was in Debenhams!

justwokeup Tue 03-Aug-21 11:46:21

I was usually as discreet as possible breastfeeding my eldest. Everyone had an opinion, which of course they shared, and it affected my confidence. One day, though, I had booked a perm so baby had to come too. All the female hairdressers were cooing over the baby under my cape and one lovely man too. Never one to miss a cuteness opportunity, the baby turned round and gave a sweet smile to everyone. That cured my shyness!

jenpax Tue 03-Aug-21 11:49:55

I an with Luckygirl, all three of my DD were breast fed (mid 80’s and early 1990’s) I went in for extended breast feeding too and I fed on demand so my inlaws had to lump it! I remember once having to sit on the floor of Waterstones with DD3 (1993) feeding her as she wouldn't wait

Christmaspudding Tue 03-Aug-21 11:56:48

I had my children in the 80's and 90's and breastfed them all. I had a very supportive mother who had breastfed her children during the 50's and 60's - to the horror of many around her. She didn't set out to be a "trailblazer", and she wasn't a "hippie"; she just had the common sense to realise that it was natural, time-saving and economical. Unfortunately I had way too much milk and sometimes it was a very messy job, so I did it in private. Most of the time it was in public though, including in church every Sunday smile

Musicgirl Tue 03-Aug-21 12:12:43

My babies were born in the nineties and I couldn't breastfeed my oldest but fed the younger two for nine and ten months respectively. I went straight to a cup for them, too. I was on a beach in 1993 with my second baby when he needed to be fed so l went to a large shelter on the promenade and lifted my top and began to feed him. The shelter had been empty but, at that very moment, a coach load of pensioners came in. All that could be seen of the baby was the top of his head and the elderly people were very complimentary about him.

DianaLouise Tue 03-Aug-21 12:18:47

I am sure when I breastfed in the eighties there were facilities in Boots and also Mothercare with fresh nappies etc.

Hetty58 Tue 03-Aug-21 12:27:11

Newatthis, my own mother was very suspicious of breastfeeding in general - and terribly embarrassed by my decision to do it. I'd just pop a small blanket over my shoulder, baby and breast in company or public.

Once, the family were all in a restaurant when baby number four suddenly woke up, needing a feed. My mother suggested I feed her in the toilet! I refused, hid everything under the blanket, and continued with dinner while feeding. Mother stormed off, finding dinner 'impossible' - as she could still hear the swallowing!

Nannashirlz Tue 03-Aug-21 12:40:20

My daughter inlaw is breastfeeding my 7 month granddaughter as we speak not that you would not notice. She is so discreet. In the 80s when had my boys. I was all for doing it with my first but lady in bed next to me was making all the noises of someone having a very passionate night. I was 18 and I thought no way am I doing that pass me a bottle lol. So she was the reason I never did. ?

Newgran59 Tue 03-Aug-21 12:53:23

Well said! I breastfed in so many different places and situations, in caves, on boat trips, hairdressers. Always tucked her under a loose t-shirt and just went for it

hilz Tue 03-Aug-21 13:08:09

1980 asked to leave a cafe in case anyone came in. There was only me there and baby discreetly up my jumper! That experience has never left me. Mostly I was very relaxed about where when and in front of whom I fed all my babies. Perfectly natural thing to do. I was discreet and was more stressed about changing nappies when away from home as they were all prone to the odd poo disaster!!
Far too much made over those who won't, don't or can't breast feed though. No mother of a newborn deserves to be made to feel they are doing the wrong thing for their baby providing they are safely cared for ,fed,loved and cherished.

Beanie654321 Tue 03-Aug-21 13:22:06

I'm afraid I never breast fed and to this day I cannot stay in the same place as she one breast feeding. Its OK ladies it's me not you. Im afraid I have some thing that makes me very nauseous when I see some one breast feeding. Tried every thing to change it but it just won't settle. I quietly remove my self from the situation as its up to the individual what they do.

JaneJudge Tue 03-Aug-21 13:29:10

I remember using ladies stores changing rooms if if was cold or wet and in all honesty sometimes i did go upstairs to the bedroom if we had evening guests and i generally always fell asleep blush

It is good it is being seen as more normal though

Growing0ldDisgracefully Tue 03-Aug-21 13:44:45

I didn't get our much while my son was at the breastfeeding stage but remember one horrid occasion when I had gone to the local park, son decided he needed feeding so we were peacefully sitting in the shade under a tree, with a shawl round us, and a vile letching man deliberately came over to sit beside right beside me and leer. I hastily abandoned the feed, gathered son and myself together and had to go home. That so spoiled what should have been a peaceful time at the park, and made me feel so uncomfortable about it that I didn't go out anywhere again except to my Mum's, or friends houses until he was no longer being breastfed.

nanna8 Tue 03-Aug-21 13:59:34

I have had that, too. We were at the Melbourne zoo and I went off in a corner under a tree to feed my baby and this vile man came and gawked at me. Horrible. I stopped the feed there and then and walked away. Mostly, though, everyone breastfed here but I didn’t find that when I had my first who was born in the uk in 1971. I joined a Nursing Mother’s Group in Australia and they were wonderful when I had problems with baby number 3 who was hard to feed, always helping and giving good advice.

Nanniejude Tue 03-Aug-21 14:12:43

Let’s hope nobody in 2021 feels embarrassed or awkward about breast feeding. It’s natural to feed your baby.
Most the girls on Love Island have half their breast out and good luck to them?

Summerlove Tue 03-Aug-21 14:28:24

New mums everywhere should be allowed to chose how they feed their baby, either with formula or breast milk, be able to breastfeed anywhere, provided they are discreet, without discrimination.

Why must they be discreet?

Daftbag1 Tue 03-Aug-21 14:29:09

My youngest daughter was on the end of my nipple for over 3 years and when she wasn't I frequently forgot my boob was out. When it was in its attire I frequently sported wet patches, so discreet? Maybe not but she was happy!

knspol Tue 03-Aug-21 15:00:21

I was with DIL in a cafe when she started breast feeding daughter, she was very discreet with back to most of the rest of cafe but a middle aged couple saw her, looked disgusted and stormed out leaving unfinished drinks and sandwiches behind. I would love to have said something but didn't want to embarass or upset DIL as she hadn't seen their reaction and was a very new mum.

Mistyfluff8 Tue 03-Aug-21 15:05:30

I could never breast feed in front of my in-laws in the 70s as my mother in law made it known she wanted to give a bottle .I stood at a counter once whilst feeding my baby waiting to pay I had a woollen winter cloak brilliant .The best thing I saw was a lady in a restaurant whose baby wouldn’t breast feed dip her nipple in sugar then the baby started feeding hilarious

Unigran4 Tue 03-Aug-21 15:28:15

I had a navel to pube-line C-section for my first DD in early 70s and so found it very uncomfortable to hold her for breast feeding. The nurses immediately made bottles for her and even took her away to feed her. No-one mentioned the rugby hold, no one suggested expressing until I was less sore, it was all just taken out of my hands.

Because of complications with the op and healing, I was in hospital for 3 weeks. By the time I came out I had little milk left and DD was not interested in the hard work (for her) of breastfeeding.

Second DD was a natural birth and straight on the breast, but we met quite a bit of resistance from pubs eating houses and the Wimpey Bar.

So glad times have changed.

Gwenisgreat1 Tue 03-Aug-21 15:41:09

Yes, in the 70s it was actively discouraged, but I decided I was going to breast feed and that was that! I only fed DD1 for six months and the 2nd for 9 months. I did get pretty fed up with the resolute stars from people, though I normally fed at home, in the car, or if in someone else's house was shown to another room. You would have thought it was an illicit practice!!

sluttygran Tue 03-Aug-21 15:55:15

I fed all my babies wherever and whenever necessary, although I must admit that I found it easier and more comfortable in a quiet spot with an easy chair.
Like an earlier poster, I was discreet and didn't 'flap it around'!
I was feeding my eldest one day, and had a visit from a girl who had been in the same maternity ward as me. We had settled down to tea and cake, and baby was contentedly having his 'tea' whilst we nattered.
My friend's three year old seemed very interested in my little one guzzling away, and suddenly remarked, in a very superior way: "We gives our baby proper milk, AND he do have orange juice!"
That was me put in my place!