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How would you react (Mil)

(16 Posts)
Nanawind Fri 13-Aug-21 17:07:46

After reading lots of different threads about Mils and Dils I thought you might like to read about my Mil and how I coped.
I'm now 61 Mil is 92.
When we had our first child I was 22 1/2. Mil came to babysit Ds was 3 months old.
She turned up with her DM.
They brought a large bag in this bag was
2 plates
2 forks
2 spoons
2 cups
Tupperware containers with sandwiches
Pork pie
Flask with tea
Pot of milk
Pot with sugar in.
When I told my DM she couldn't understand why I wasn't offended.
In fact we have been married over 40 years and she has only had 5 cups of tea in our home.
Never used our bathroom (she has a great bladder)
What would you have done or said.
Me I just laughed I think DH was more offended.

BlueBelle Fri 13-Aug-21 17:11:19

Why worry everyone’s different made her comfortable and saved you work
(no idea what she turned up with
DM is a pair of boots in my world)

Nanawind Fri 13-Aug-21 17:14:04

She turned up with her mother.

Blossoming Fri 13-Aug-21 17:15:50

DM = Darling/Dear Mother.

I think I would have been highly amused Nanawind

MoorlandMooner Fri 13-Aug-21 17:19:57

I would have thought she was VERY odd and would have eaten the pork pie and the cake.

Oopsadaisy1 Fri 13-Aug-21 17:26:15

They bought themselves a picnic, how lovely, I hope they sat on a blanket and shared it with you!

FarNorth Fri 13-Aug-21 17:42:58

They came to babysit and brought their own refreshments and dishes.
Seems very thoughtful to me - they didn't expect you to provide anything and they didn't have to look for plates etc in your kitchen.
What's to be offended about?

(Unless you knew it was because they thought your house was an unhygienic tip.)

Smileless2012 Fri 13-Aug-21 17:50:33

I would have wondered if she was OCD TBH especially as over a 40 year period she's never had more than 5 cups of tea in your home.

As FarNorth has posted "What's to be offended about?"

V3ra Fri 13-Aug-21 18:00:25

I think that was very considerate of her! As long as you hadn't prepared anything for her yourself?

My mother-in-law and a friend were invited to lunch one time during the early days of our marriage. She turned up with an extra friend as well, no prior notice or asking was it ok.
Fortunately I'd made a pie so I could share it out, but I did wonder what we'd have done if I'd gone with my first plan of pork chops and there weren't enough to go round 🙄

Nanawind Fri 13-Aug-21 18:00:33

Mil is a very unique character.
When we had to start doing her shopping we were given the label/wrappings of everything.
Fruit and veg were only to be bought from a certain market stall. She would know if we didn't.
At the delicatessen we got her 2 slices of roast ham as long as they weren't to big.
And she wanted 2 eggs from the egg lady. (We got 6 and gave her 2)
In 50 years she never went in bil/sils house.

BlueSky Fri 13-Aug-21 18:01:20

Well I would have thought weird but it’s up to her. Same as if I’d been that way inclined when visiting her home. You would be though of as odd though.

Hetty58 Fri 13-Aug-21 18:02:04

Nanawind, it could be that she turned up everywhere well equipped! I have a friend who's rather like that and brings her lunch with her - and I tend to take Yorkshire tea bags with me (can't stand weak, milky tea)!

crazyH Fri 13-Aug-21 18:04:47

Nanawind 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Redhead56 Fri 13-Aug-21 20:48:12

I would not go to such extremes her picnic sounds like a military operation.
When we visit our daughter we just take a little lunch some times. My daughter will often say “mum we do have food here you know” My husband is diabetic and has a rather rigid diet so I usually take a salad I prepared at home. I take tea bags for me she only has decaf. If my son in law is abroad for work I stay a couple of nights and take 🍷wine because they don’t drink!

Nannagarra Sat 14-Aug-21 14:07:52

You are honoured as
- she and her DM brought everything they needed so you didn’t have to go to the trouble
- she trusted you to do her very specific shop for her
- in 50 years she didn’t go into BiL/SiL’s house

You’re obviously her favourite! She sounds a real character!

Germanshepherdsmum Sat 14-Aug-21 14:24:56

Weird but very thoughtful, assuming there was enough food and tea for you too?