Going bald..

I worried about what people would think when I went from thin and balding to thick with my hair system. I only had lovely comments and wish I'd done it sooner. It's my life at the end of the day.

I'm seeing docs for other health issues, Meryl, which are causing the hairloss, I think.

At the moment my health is the main thing I need to try and sort out, and it's taking what little energy I have, so I've left my hair for now.

Sweetpeasue Thank you. I'm sorry for what you went through/are going through too. It's horrendous isn't it? There have been several threads on hair loss on Gransnet which may help you. I never imagined loss of hair could be so traumatic. I think the reason it has affected me so badly is that, with apologies to those who've heard it all before, was that I had all my teeth taken out through neglect aged 11. It seems doubly cruel. And yes I do feel sorry for myself.

That's the thing isn't it?
To not care if people notice.
Men don't worry about toupees, however noticeable they are.
They wear them with pride.

MissAdventure
Apologies if I’ve missed it in the thread, but have you seen a doctor? In the hope that you could see a dermatologist.
I can’t remember if you said you were still working?
If not, please try to not wash your hair so much, and when you do try to use a natural shampoo bar.

Thankyou MerylStreep. I know you're right. I guess it just takes some courage. Which with one thing and another lately, is running out fast.
I don't use conditioner in mine MissAdventure as I feel it makes it flatter but we all have our own way of trying to deal with it.

Sweetpeasue
And what if people do realise? Wear your wig with pride ?

Mine is so greasy.
The ends look like something from a 70s rock band singer - all frazzled and dry, then the top looks as if I've smeared lard all over it.
The ends are blonde, and the roots dark because I'm afraid to do anything to it.
I think people must question how I can possibly walk around looking so unkempt and grubby, but I do wash it!

Kate1949so sorry you were driven to feel this way. I did get extremely depressed about it for a long time. I can imagine your pain. ?

It is absolutely ridiculous that we should feel like this, *MissAdventure,
I agree.
Theres no 'right' weather either. Sun shines through - exposing. Wind blows-exposing and birds nest. Rain-disaster. Hat on--can't take it off again in company.
Oh dear. Sorry. Actually not sure if many women do have transplants. They're not guaranteed to work of course. The wigs that others have said have worked for them sound good and had me thinking--maybe. People would realise though if I suddenly went from sparse to thick.

It does feel somehow a bit shameful, and it's utterly ridiculous, of course!
That's why I thought I would post about it, because I was sure there must be others it will help.
I'm glad it did.

Incidentally, do women ever have hair transplants?
It's only just occurred to me that I have never heard of a woman having one.

Unless you've suffered with this problem nobody, absolutely nobody can understand the impact it has on your self esteem.
I started with thinning hair at 43. I thought it was stress at losing my mum(Pancreatic cancer) but soon realised it was Alopecia Androgenetica, or the horrible nam male/female pattern baldness. I saw a dermatologist (NHS) and a photo was taken of top of head, before and after, using Minoxidil, which I was given a repeat prescription for to use for 6 months. It made my scalp itch but I persevered and it made no visible difference. This product available in chemists but expensive and if you notice a difference you have to keep using it.
I'm now 65 and I hate the fact my scalp is so very visible with hardly any fringe at all. Also I've got the lovy family gene of early greying. Totally white by 46 so am dyeing it all the time, it looks dreadful after 2 weeks.
The hair system I've looked into Kate1949 but no hairdresser in my area does this.
I do understand how ashamed and humiliated it makes one feel. I'm sorry for those who have this problem and I'm very grateful that you have brought this up MissAdventure. It made me feel not so alone while reading of others feelings.

I have a hair system. I too have compliments about my hair. I can't feel it on my head. I can wash it, style it, wash it in the shower just like everyone else does with their hair. I had to do it. I was suicidal.

I ruled out physical reasons- hair used to be thick but it was getting so thin. I finally was fitted for a topper. Unless I tell a person it's not my real hair, they don't know. I've had strangers tell me how great my hair is. I just smile and say thank you. The stylist I saw has loads of experience with cancer patients, people with alopecia, general hair loss. My only regret is that I waited so long to do this. It's a brilliant solution. Toppers are light weight and easy to put on, and if put on correctly, are v secure.

A paper bag over my head is rather an appealing option, presently.
Thank you.

Thinning hair is awful. Mine was getting very thin, pre Covid, and I was blow drying it most days, which didn't help. I used all sorts of products, none of which worked.
Since Covid I haven't been back to the hairdressers and my hair seems thicker. I think it just needed leaving alone to recover from all the heat damage.
I did buy two expensive wigs, but have thrown them out. They were hard to put on and keep on, and very irritating.
If you are ill and stressed, that in itself can manifest partly as hair loss.
I hope you can find a solution that works for you.

I know what you mean May Bee 70, the envy and the embarrassment. I am in Spain at the moment and I saw my hairdresser here for the first time in a year. I could tell he was shocked by the amount my hair had receded in a year, as was I.

I found if I used too much conditioner it flattened my hair and have started putting in on before I wash it. Quite a large amount and then shampoo it out. That works better for me.

Framilode. Often, when I was at the hairdressers waiting for a trim my hairdresser would be doing someone else’s hair and she’d look across at me and we’d both say ‘she’s got my share of hair, hasn’t she’ . Annoyingly I still have to pay the same amount which adds insult to injury! What I don’t understand is it takes me ages to wash my hair. Probably because I put on so much conditioner as I don’t want to comb through wet hair, damage it and lose even more.

I think when I feel a bit better (if that day ever comes) I do need to see someone, so I know what I'm dealing with, and if it's likely to grow back at all.

When mine was very thin with bald patches, I became adept at hiding from cameras, not wanting to go on holidays, to functions etc. I retired from my job after nearly 40 years but wouldn't have a retirement 'do' because I couldn't bear to be looked at. What a shame. Someone even said to me once 'Poor you. I think I'd kill myself if I lost my hair'. Nice.

Oh yes, mine is receding too, and I already have a high forehead.
The hair that is left has gone totally white, in circles around the thin bits.
I hate it when someone says let's eat out or something, because I have just greasy strands of hair left.
Not the most appealing look.

I am so sorry Miss Adventure, I empathise completely.
My hair has been slowly thinning since I was in my teens and is now very thin indeed. It is also receding quite dramatically.

I have recently been diagnosed with Frontal Fibrosing Alopecia. This is thinning and receding at front and sides which leaves a shiny white scalp where hair was previously.
It also leads to loss of eyebrows and body hair, all of which have happened to me. It is an auto immune condition and cannot be reversed. The shiny, white scalp is scarring apparently.

Now I know that it is progressive and incurable it is almost a relief. I can forget about all the treatments I have tried over the years and the false hope these have raised.

I am going to buy a couple of wigs and tough it out and try to regain the confidence I have lost.

I understand how soul destroying it must be for you and hope this is just a temporary thing. Hair is so important to our femininity and can make such a difference to our appearance. I am ashamed to say I burn with jealousy when I see someone with beautiful thick hair.

It is horrible.
My heart sinks when I see yet another bald patch shining through.
People seem to get quite aggressive about it, too, as if you shouldn't say anything.

Oh Maybee How I agree with your 'supposed to be upbeat' comment. Losing your hair is horrible. I was upset about it at work once when it was thinning. A colleague said 'For goodness sake it's only hair'. This from someone with a lovely thick mop of hair. I have heard women who have had a cancer diagnosis say the worst thing is losing their hair. Now I have lost it all, it's soul destroying. One of the Rolling Stones was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago and said he would rather die than have chemo and lose his hair. That's how horrible it is.

I tie my hair up in a little top knot (it is little cause there’s not much hair, though). The wigs do stay in place. I did wear one a couple of times and people said they had no idea it was a wig. I reckon I worry because I’m always looking at other people’s hair and trying to work out if they’re wearing a wig or not. But, of course, other people don’t do that do they! I might walk the dog in one on a windy day and see if it blows off! No different to wearing a hat which I would be wearing anyway.