To see ourselves as others see us! How do you think others see you?

lemongrove I think you make an interesting point about people not behaving the same with everybody. Of course everyone can have an occasional moment when they act out of character, but I do know people whose behaviour can change depending on who they're with.

paddyann54. Hear hear. My doctor friend has told me that I have body dysmorphia. So not vain or in need of new glasses.

Lemongrove thats not strictly true,I have had body issues my whole life been a size6 and a size 14 and when I look in a mirror I cant see any difference .I know my clothes are smaller but all I see is a wee fat woman .Legacy from an image concious mother who told me I looked fat in my size 8 dress on my wedding day ....and thousands of other times .Now when I look at old photos I see myself very differently from I did back then.Sadly the mirror is still the same it the wee fat woman who looks back

I really don’t want to know how others see me. It would inevitably bear no resemblance to how I see myself and chances are that different people focus on different aspects. The people who matter know me well enough and keep their opinions mostly to themselves

My sympathies Luckygirl3 I too am widowed and wouldn't dream of sharing my occasional despair.

As for how others see me - isn't that something that younger people worry about? I feel that as long as I do my best it doesn't matter what others think - I might have tied myself up in knots about it when I was younger but at my age I've made peace with the fact that not everyone will like me and that's all right.

Not sure I want to know. We all have perceptions about ourselves that may not be accurate.
I have been described as emotionally strong, brave, kind, quiet by different people.
I think I just get on with whatever life throws at me as that is all I can do.

People see me as competent and coping well after bereavement last year - it is all a front - inside, grief stalks my every waking moment. But what is the point in inflicting that on others? - so the act continues..........

Well..we just don’t know do we? Even those close to us may not always tell us the unvarnished truth ( do we actually want the unvarnished truth?)
Unless we are vain or need new specs I think we can all see how we look physically, personality wise it probably depends on who you are speaking/ dealing with as to how we are perceived.
I don’t think we are ever the same with everybody.
Somebody may appear a battleaxe at work and a pussycat at home.

Physically yes. I see myself as an old lined (not wrinkled ..I dream of just wrinkled) dumpy person but I have been told otherwise . Eg slim attractive stylish .
Personality wise I come across as confident and a bit scary I know but I’m actually a mass of insecurities !!
The only thing I think in common is I have apparently a good sense of humour

Physically people see a short, plump, old lady. In my head I see a fit, healthy 20-year old. I have been told I appear strong and confident. Inside I’m a bundle of hopes and fears like most people.

I think there is a disconnection to how I see myself and the way others see me. I see myself as kind, caring, empathetic, non-materialistic and strong (because I've had to be) on the one hand. On the other hand, I am totally lacking in confidence and very anxious and nervous due to life events which has held me back all my life.
I think people who know me understand the way I am. I think people who don't know me so well or don't know my history, think I am kind and caring but also like a rabbit caught in the headlights.

Don’t know you only from here, but would lots be more like you as I know folk accurately see me as I feel sometimes a d that’s. “ lightweight” I’d love to be more active than passive….
I’m a born sheep who will always follow others wait to be told what to do do ……it exasperates me so goodness knows what others feel ?‍♀️