Should you let guests know you're not cooking traditional Christmas Dinner

That should read BOG standard not big standard.

I would be very disappointed if I was invited somewhere for Christmas Dinner and then the takeaway menu for the local Indian was handed around. It would feel like a big standard Friday or Saturday night, not a special annual occasion.

Fair enough if that's what you personally want to do. But I wouldn't assume it was OK with everyone else. I think it's information that should be included with the invitation so people can politely decline if they want.

If inviting someone for Christmas Dinner the one main family meal of the year. If you are serving anything other than a Christmas dinner it's ignorance not to inform them. Would you expect me to sit and watch others eat? I can't stand the smell of curry. I don't eat onions which are in alot of vegan dishes and I don't touch spices. It's not just a dinner to have on boxing day. Christmas day is an important celebration once a year. It would ruin my Christmas day. So I stay at home so I can eat what I like not what someone likes. Invite the family by all means but says "would you like yo come to our for an Indian takeaway on Christmas day".

AreWeThereYet

^So the food counts, and counts, and counts. Tell people and give them a choice.^

I so agree. I'll eat pretty much anything except shellfish. I'll never forget being given fresh oysters at a surprise party because my hosts thought they were something special. Much as I appreciate the lovely thought, if they had just checked first I wouldn't have thrown up all over their carpet trying to be a good guest (sorry, TMI there maybe).

Raw oysters are IMO vastly overrated anyway - I’m sure they’d be a lot nicer cooked.

It’s not so long ago that they were considered poor people’s food. IIRC there’s a comment in Dickens’ Pickwick Papers, about poverty and oysters going together. (Sam Weller?).

Yes, if the invitation is to Christmas dinner on Christmas day you should definitely say whether the dinner is traditional British Christmas dinner or if not what is likely to be on the menu.
There is nothing worse than being responsible for avoidable disappointment on a special occasion.

I would like to know if I was invited to a non traditional meal on Christmas Day. That way I could decide whether I wanted to cook something traditional on Boxing Day instead.
I would however be happy to have someone else cook dinner on Christmas Day as I have cooked for over 40 years.

And this is the strange thing, after thinking about it again, if the food was going to be different because someone was from another country and they were serving their traditional Christmas day meal, I might well be inclined to accept,

I would too - because it's likely they would have said on inviting that they'll be cooking their traditional Xmas dishes.

Very different from expecting traditional British food and being served Indian takeaway!

In our family we have a memory of 'The Year We Didn't Have Christmas'. We did, in fact have a turkey dinner, but for reasons not relevant here, everything else was done differently from our usual tradition. And we have never forgotten it.

For many people Christmas is, while things may change a bit from year to year, a time where everyone knows exactly how it will be - and that includes the traditional food. That may vary from country to country.

And this is the strange thing, after thinking about it again, if the food was going to be different because someone was from another country and they were serving their traditional Christmas day meal, I might well be inclined to accept,

I have had turkey and all accompaniments every Christmas in living memory apart from the year we went to our sons and had goose. Nice enough, but I love turkey, sprouts et al.

My assumption is that if I’m invited somewhere for Christmas lunch then it would be a traditional meal, unless I’ve been told otherwise. I agree that the company is the most important bit but unfortunately I can’t tolerate spicy foods so an Indian meal would def not be an option for me. Either I would need to take something or my own, or not eat. I don’t mind if it’s not the traditional meal but I’d probably decline if it wasn’t a meal that I could eat.

I agree with Monica. The Christmas traditions are so important to many of us and connect us back to Christmasses of the past and people now gone. And for many that includes the traditional dinner that people in our families have been eating for generations: a roast turkey or goose, stuffing, potatoes, Brussels sprouts etc. It's a reassuring ritual for many, along with Carol services, well loved decorations, Aunty Maud arriving on the train on Christmas Eve etc

Some people don't feel sentimental about that kind of thing, but many do and 'Christmas Dinner' has a specific connotation. If you're going to serve up a chicken korma or sweet and sour pork then I think you should let guests know and accept that some would prefer to stick to their own traditions.

So the food counts, and counts, and counts. Tell people and give them a choice.

I so agree. I'll eat pretty much anything except shellfish. I'll never forget being given fresh oysters at a surprise party because my hosts thought they were something special. Much as I appreciate the lovely thought, if they had just checked first I wouldn't have thrown up all over their carpet trying to be a good guest (sorry, TMI there maybe).

I think I'd go in the loo and have a little cry if it was something I didn't like for dinner.
I couldn't eat fish, however polite I was trying to be.

If l was being invited for Christmas Dinner l wouldn't buy a turkey for myself so yes l would be very disappointed, if l was told first then l could do my own idea of a Christmas dinner boxing day

It might sound pedantic but I think there is a difference in expectation between being invited for " Christmas Dinner" and being invited for "dinner on Christmas day". If I was not doing a traditional dinner I would tell my guests at the time I invited them. Partly to make sure they liked what I planned on cooking ( I would never cook spicy food without being sure my guests liked it) and that they had no allergies. My DiL to be is allergic to peas and apples, fortunately I checked whether or not she had any allergies before she first came as I had planned on making a fruit salad.

You can get together with family and friends anytime, you do not need Christmas to do that.

But for most people, Christmas is more than that. It is part of the bonding of family and friends by the following of old family rituals that everybody knows and eating the food that everyone expects and putting up with the obstreporous toddler and trying to stop at least one person from drinking too much. The traditional meal with the sprouts that several won't eat and the familiar ltenative for those who do not like Christmas pudding.

So the food counts, and counts, and counts. Tell people and give them a choice.

I think it would be advisable to let people know in advance just so they’re not disappointed. I’d eat whatever is being served but would much prefer a traditional turkey dinner.

Christmas Dinner is a normal meat dinner. If vegan vegetarian or Indian food is being served I personally couldn't eat it. So I'd tell them outright. Thank you so much for the invite, however we are not vegans etc etc and we shall be staying at home now.

Yes l would.But all said and done its about spending time with family and friends and no cooking, thats got to be a bonus!

Yes it should be said to stop disappointments. This traditional meal is only once a year.
When I was living in China, we went to a European restaurant, it wasn’t the traditional meal we all hankered for, although it was very expensive. I searched for several days after, to find a turkey, so we could have our family Christmas meal. (days before food shops)

Absolutely, it’s very rude not to. We really dislike Indian food and I am not vegan and having nut and wheat allergies, a lot vegan food is not suitable and you can have either of those any day.
Christmas dinner is one day, most people do not have Turkey regularly but eat whatever you want just don’t expect other people to do so

Yes, I think any host should give an indication of what is planned for the meal. These days, so many people have health problems, or allergies, I think it would be polite to do so. No host wants to have guests who do not or cannot eat what is offered.
As a "picky eater" I never expect people to accommodate my tastes and would say when accepting, "I hope you won't be offended if I leave something I dislike? I love most vegetables!"

I know my OH would prefer to know beforehand if it wasn't traditional. Partly because he normally go out for a few pub meals beforehand, and often choose other than traditional Xmas, waiting for the big day to savour it. Imagine the disappointment!

Having said that, I'm vegie so normally just love all the varied veg, and stuffing, and cauliflower cheese.

Perhaps the invitation should have been worded “please come to dinner on Christmas Day” rather than “please come for Christmas Dinner”

I would certainly mention it if I wasn’t cooking a traditional Christmas dinner, but TBH I’d be delighted to eat (almost) anything that I haven’t had to cook.