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Are you interested in other people's babies?

(151 Posts)
Beswitched Wed 05-Jan-22 13:14:15

A friend's daughter is home from France for a few days with her 2 year old son.

Friend arranged to meet a couple of us for coffee so we could see grandson. He was a cute little fellow but quite shy. I played with him a bit and pushed him on the swing while granny went to the loo.

Other friend wasn't hugely interested in the child. She wasn't rude or anything. She remarked how like his mother he was and asked a couple of questions but just wasn't gooing and gaaing over him.

Grandmother has just texted me sounding quite offended that friend didn't pay much attention to her grandson.

But to be honest, this friend isn't really that interested in children other than her own when they were small. I know a few people like that, and that's just the way they are. They're perfectly nice people but other than a few polite questions, they're not bothered about other people's babies.

Just wondering, I suppose, if any of you found that your interest in your own children didn't necessarily prompt an interest in anyone else's?

Anneeba Thu 06-Jan-22 14:21:24

Love babies, toddlers, little children, big ones, young adults; so much energy and sense of fun (get the monosyllabic teenager on their own). Also love all animals, especially baby ones...

Bluedaisy Thu 06-Jan-22 15:38:23

I’m afraid I could no more coo over babies or children than fly to the moon! I had fertility treatment to have my son and absolutely adored him when he was born (still do) but I knew straight away I didn’t ever want anymore. Funnily enough he’s not interested in babies or children apart from his only son but my own father and his mother were the same! BUT give me a puppy ? and I'll coo and go gag gah as much as you like! It’s a good job we’re not all the same.

Calistemon Thu 06-Jan-22 15:49:42

Anneeba

Love babies, toddlers, little children, big ones, young adults; so much energy and sense of fun (get the monosyllabic teenager on their own). Also love all animals, especially baby ones...

Much more fun than many adults, aren't they Anneeba!

posset Thu 06-Jan-22 16:08:11

Phew, I'm so glad I read this thread - I thought there must be something wrong with me for being uninterested in other people's children! I love my own grandchildren but did find them boring when babies, much more interesting as they grow up, but I wouldn't inflict their progress on anyone else!

Oofy Thu 06-Jan-22 16:56:57

Married at 29, but dd didn’t come along till 10 years later. Non -appearance did not bother me in the slightest, but adored her straight away when she arrived. Wasn’t at all gooey about babies before then or since, despite (or maybe because of) working in maternity department. Puppies, on the other hand……….. ! Wonder how I’ll feel when (and if) gc come along.?

Secondwind Thu 06-Jan-22 17:03:35

I really enjoy interacting with children whenever I get the opportunity. Their curiosity fascinates me, their joy in simple things is a real pleasure, but their energy exhausts me!

Germanshepherdsmum Thu 06-Jan-22 17:04:04

Similar to me Oofy except I married at 19 and my son was born when I was 34, never worked with babies or children though and didn’t have the slightest interest until I suddenly decided I did want a baby at 33 and I’m very glad I had that change of heart. Never been interested in any other children though and wondering how I’ll manage if I become a grandmother. I really worry about it as I’m so close to my son and daughter in law but I fear I may offend them.

H1954 Thu 06-Jan-22 18:21:49

Not interested at all to be honest. I just zone out when someone starts talking about babies and showing photographs. Can't say that I'm too keen on having someone's puppy thrust in my face as happened to me quite recently whilst out walking with my neighbour, a friend of hers had a new puppy which she brought out to show us when we passed her house. Why do people think it's acceptable to expect anyone to welcome a dog being thrust in their face licking and slobbering ?

4allweknow Thu 06-Jan-22 19:06:44

Its so hard nowadays to know which way to react towards children. As expressed by OP if non gushing you are scorned and if you do show a lot of interest you could be viewed with suspicion. I would express my thoughts to the adult and only make physical contact in the presence of the accompanying adult.

Dianehillbilly1957 Thu 06-Jan-22 19:14:20

Obviously I loved my children, but to be honest I wasn't really over keen on Other people's children, still not!!

valdali Thu 06-Jan-22 19:21:23

Yes I'm interested other people's babies, but even more interesteed in other people's dogs (better at remembering names too)

Musicgirl Thu 06-Jan-22 19:21:58

I enjoyed my own children when they were babies and small children. They are now grown up and l do not have grandchildren although friends do. I always take appropriate interest and admire photos, but I am interested to a point. When it comes to other people’s children, I prefer older children and teenagers - the age group l teach.

Blondiescot Thu 06-Jan-22 19:31:45

Germanshepherdsmum

Similar to me Oofy except I married at 19 and my son was born when I was 34, never worked with babies or children though and didn’t have the slightest interest until I suddenly decided I did want a baby at 33 and I’m very glad I had that change of heart. Never been interested in any other children though and wondering how I’ll manage if I become a grandmother. I really worry about it as I’m so close to my son and daughter in law but I fear I may offend them.

I wouldn't worry about it, to be honest. I was the same - had no interest in babies or children whatsoever until I had my two, and certainly wasn't anxious to become a granny. When my grandson did arrive though, I loved him from the start just as I did with my children. Still have no interest in other people's children or grandchildren though, and if he turns out to be my only grandchild, it wouldn't bother me. If you do become a grandmother, I'm sure you'll be just fine.

Beswitched Thu 06-Jan-22 19:53:30

4allweknow

Its so hard nowadays to know which way to react towards children. As expressed by OP if non gushing you are scorned and if you do show a lot of interest you could be viewed with suspicion. I would express my thoughts to the adult and only make physical contact in the presence of the accompanying adult.

Good point. You're apparently not allowed even touch anyone's baby nowadays, nevermind pick them up or cuddle them. But at the same time you should be fascinated by twenty billion photos and videos of them confused

watermeadow Thu 06-Jan-22 19:54:13

I had babies and children around for twenty three years, my own and respite care children with special needs. I then became a granny.
I so much miss babies and can’t wait to be a great granny. I peer into other people’s prams. BUT I do not want to see dozens of pictures of other people’s grandchildren who I will never know. Real children yes, pictures no.

Yellowmellow Thu 06-Jan-22 20:17:14

No I'm not really interested in other people's babies....but then I don't bore them to death with my grandchildren either

GreyKnitter Thu 06-Jan-22 20:20:21

I love babies and small children so yes, I am interested in them. They are our future!

BRAVEBETH Thu 06-Jan-22 20:51:37

I love babies and children of all ages. They bring me joy and hope whilst caring for mother. My cousin's daughter had a lovely baby called Willow. She is wonderful. Her face is so expressive
Her big sister Olive is a delight and a wonderful sister. She is 5 and has just started school. My mother is in bed all day. She has no interest at all. I do not understand it at all. She refuses to open her eyes.
I love watching babies and children. There was a delightful boy with an older disabled sister. He was so kind to his sister. His mother was very embarrassed by her disabled child

Elegran Thu 06-Jan-22 20:59:41

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Chewbacca Thu 06-Jan-22 21:02:07

Gordon Bennett! Is it a full moon tonight or something?

Calistemon Thu 06-Jan-22 21:03:56

Message deleted as it quotes a deleted post.

Elegran Thu 06-Jan-22 21:06:33

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chewbacca Thu 06-Jan-22 21:07:24

We've had some oddities recently haven't we Callistemon! Just like the old days of onesies and plimsolls! grin

Saetana Thu 06-Jan-22 22:16:32

No interest in children whatsoever - its why I never wanted any of my own - even if you do like children it can be really tedious listening to others gushing over their little darlings (children/grandchildren). I honestly think some people don't realise just how much they are boring their friends and relatives with interminable photos and chat about the rugrats.

Skydancer Thu 06-Jan-22 22:25:23

I could only ever relate to children who were the same age as my own whatever age they were. Now with a teenage GS I find I'm quite interested in his friends even though I'd never have thought I'd be drawn to teenagers. I think it's because I can relate to them in the same way I relate to my GS.